


play ball

by racheleigh



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Baseball, Baseball, Closeted Character, Drug Use, Happy Jisung, M/M, Strangers to Lovers, changlix, chill Minho, cute changlix, cute woochan, minsung - Freeform, prodigy jeongin, rocky seungjin, seungjin - Freeform, stray kids - Freeform, woochan - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-14
Updated: 2020-03-16
Packaged: 2020-12-16 10:08:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 63,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21034523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/racheleigh/pseuds/racheleigh
Summary: “Why are you nice to me?”Minho looks almost shocked, looking at Jisung’s wide eyes. From where the older sits on the ground, shoulders hunched over, he looks tired, human.“I mean our teams fucking hate each other, and yet everyday, you stand up for me,” the squirrelly boy laughs, “in your annoyingly unreadable way.” Minho waits for him to finish, “I just can’t seem to get into your head, and you know I thought I would figure it out like I figured out Changbin and Hyunjin, but...” Jisung pauses running a hand through the pond in front of him, “I don’t know.”Minho takes a breathe, smiling to himself, “I guess I just don’t see the point in hating someone like you.”Jisung furrows him eyebrows, almost frustrated by the simplicity of his answer.Minho smiles at the younger’s puffed cheeks and furrowed brow, “I don’t know, you’re kind, and you’re funny. You’re always trying to make new friends, you’re admirable,” He looks up from his hands placed in his crisscrossed legs, “You’re real,” he lifts a hand to move hair from Jisung’s forehead, resting it on his cheek, “I find that beautiful,” he lets out a ghost of a laugh, “You’re beautiful.”where jisung and minho meet playing baseball.





	1. Chapter 1

America.

Jisung was having a difficult time deciding about how he felt about America.

There's a certain thing about the United States, an aura, a feeling foreigners have about it.

His whole life, America was this far away land that was, for lack of a better word, 'cool'. The place where the celebrities and the music came from, the birth place of rap.

Don't get him wrong, he's excited off his ass to finally arrive in the US, but now that he's _here_, he was having second thoughts on how glamorous it would actually be. It honestly hadn't hit him what would _really_ be happening until he landed, now all he could do was sit and stare out the window at the passing plane lanes, trying to take it all in.

He was going to be training in America, with one of the biggest baseball teams in the world.

In a shocking turn of events, this year, the KBO (Korean Baseball Organization) is paying good money for a few players from a few of its teams to travel to America for a few months to be trained and play for one of the most well known MLB teams in America, the Los Angeles Angels. It didn't quite make sense to others when it was first announced, but when you pay attention to baseball as much as the fanatics do, it starts to click. Really, as much as Jisung hates to say it, Korean and American baseball have distinct differences, not only in the way they play, but in skill level.

The program is aimed to improve the KBO's players technical skills and bring back new techniques and opportunities for Korean baseball as a unit.

It wasn't that he was exceptionally nervous to play baseball, that's what he does, and he has to admit where he came from, he was one of the _best_. But he's going to be living and playing in _America_, a place _full_ of hopeful players, trained to a much more intense extent than he was.

Sure, living in the United States was a great childhood dream, but the more Jisung overthought it, this was scary shit.

The culture, the _language barrier_, the pure _idea _of living in a foreign country, it was absolutely terrifying.

But now as he lands in the United States, the trip of a century, he has no choice. All he can do is _try_ to decide how he feels about where he'll be living for the next months, so far he's come up empty handed.

All his teammates tell him is that it's a opportunity of a lifetime, that he should be jumping with joy, to even to picked for this opportunity was an honor, but what awaits him in the home of the free, he is unsure of.

If anything, he has a bad feeling about it.

Whatever is going to happen in his time here, it absolutely can't be good, he can just _feel_ it.

"Yah, Han Jisung, get your ass in gear, there's people waiting to get off this plane." As soon as Seungmin mentions the line of people waiting with their carry ons, forming behind a pissy Seungmin, he scrambles to his feet, grabbing his things.

He slightly bowed to apologize and mustered up a quiet "sorry" in English, only to realize the irony of the two actions put together and feeling a bit awkward.

He wasn't sure he could get used to this.

Checking his bags instead of carrying them on seemed like a genius idea now that he had a hoard of people waiting for him to get out of his seat. If he made the line wait for him any longer to haul his carry on out of the overhead bin, he was sure they would throw a fit. He quickly grabbed his backpack from under his chair and speed walked down the aisle to catch up with the rest of his team. Woojin and Changbin stood near the exit of the plane, waiting for Seungmin and Jisung.

Woojin looked like a mom counting children's heads, quietly whispering all the names accounting for everyone. As soon as he had rounded up all three of his players, he quickly ushered them out of the plane into the passenger boarding bridge connecting the airplane to the terminal gate.

Jisung looked warily at the opening leading to the terminal. The opening seemed to grow bigger as he walked towards it. Seungmin and Changbin talk idly, way too calmly in the squirrelly boy's opinion.

Entering the airport, Jisung could already feel the rush of fear, the feeling of being out of place.

In reality, no one _knows_ he's a foreigner, no one knows how nervous he is, but _he _knows.

Woojin notices the ridged expression on the scared boy's face and comes up behind him to rub his back soothingly. If the oldest was tired, he wouldn't let anyone know, he was the rock, the glue that held these boys together, no chance in hell that this lot would make it even ten minutes without their manager.

"Okay, the shuttle that's taking us to our hotel, should be here already, that means we're speed walking to baggage claim, we don't want our first impression to be the late ones, got it?"

It's almost humorous how Woojin maintains his serious manager voice when in a casual setting, but Jisung only smiles at the older's habits, suddenly spotting the closet bathroom.

"Hey, hyung, sorry if this wasn't a part of your schedule, but I gotta pee." Jisung watches as Woojin's face drops into one of frustration, he groans, "Go pee, be fast, like lighting, we'll wait here."

Jisung does a little victory dance before running off to the bathroom he previously spotted.

When he walks in the large bathroom the first thing he notices is there's many people in there, probably people from the same flight, doing the same as the Korean boy.

It takes Jisung by surprise when he sees him, he almost wants to run straight out of there.

He was aware that other baseball teams from Korea had confirmed they were participating in the program as well, but he didn't quite realize what that meant. The KBO encompasses all of the nation's baseball teams, which are few in number considering their total teams are only a third of what the MLB has. As a result, teams from the KBO often find themselves playing the same teams multiple times a season. It's not uncommon to find friends or rivalry's across teams, and Jisung's team just so happens to find that in the Doosan Bears.

So seeing Lee Know, a very prominent player, the Bear's very own second baseman and star batter, he was quite taken aback. He really only wanted to pee, and he knew he had to be fast, but he couldn't help but stare. Korean baseball royalty was washing his hands while checking his appearance in the mirror, a hand coming up to fix his hair. Of course, maybe Jisung was baseball royalty too, but he would never admit that.

Not only is Lee Minho, an incredible baseball player, he was not bad looking in the slightest, and Jisung had known that for a while. His countless sports endorsements, ads, he's everywhere in the sports world. Advertisement companies see pretty face, muscular body, and famous sports player all in one and croon. It's hard to tell level of attractiveness from across a field, but _Jesus_ he was just on a 11 hour plane ride and he looks like _that_. Plus there was always the thighs, the god damn thighs.

Jisung was fine staring at the man through the mirror, that was until he met his eyes. Maybe it was pure humiliation, but he couldn't seem to look away as Minho's face contorted into one of confusion, then realization, and finally settling with a smirk.

Jisung knew he was wearing his LG Twins tshirt, and he knew that they had seen each other before. Thankfully no harsh words had been thrown each other's way before, but still the intimidating feeling was radiating off the man.

_The Lee Know_ was _drying his hands_ of all things, all while delivering the most smug look imaginable right through the mirror at a star studded Han Jisung.

And he was petrified.

He was frozen in his spot, which happened to be close to the entrance of the bathroom, a rather unfortunate location.

When the man ran right into Jisung, he was obviously sorry, spewing a constant stream of "I'm so sorry"s and "Are you okay"s.

Jisung had a heavy blush on his face, he was so _embarrassed_. The pure fact that he was ran into because he was staring too hard at the man from his rival team, _while he was watching_, it was humiliating.

Jisung barely even manages an "I'm okay" before he quickly leaves.

He wasn't sure he needed to peed quite so bad anymore, it could wait.

—

Jisung didn't know what he was expecting, maybe he thought the air would smell different, or he would immediately be ridiculed for his limited English and overall foreigner aura. But he wasn't, in fact, the airport was so diverse with all different races and languages and in one place, it almost shocked him.

When the sliding doors opened to reveal the car lanes, he found that it looked almost the same as in Korea. Minus the English plastered everywhere and the hoards of diverse people, it was the same, that was good. He can deal with that.

Woojin walks ahead of the group leading them presumably to the shuttle, and of course carrying the most luggage of everyone, taking extra bags from his teammates against their will. Woojin's head darts from sign to sign, he was never really be good at English, but that doesn't mean he wouldn't try.

Jisung tries to help him out by reading a few, but honestly, Woojin was walking way too fast for him to have enough time to process the signs.

That's when Jisung, in his search for comprehension, spots a man holding a paper with something that he finally understood, Korean. There in big bold font was LG 트윈스 and in smaller font below was the English name the LG Twins.

Jisung could recognize that, like it was his first name, Korean or not.

But it was still thoughtful of them to include the Korean, it made him feel more comfortable.

When we made it to the man standing in front of the shuttle, the first thing Jisung noticed was his unbelievably bright smile and _dimples_. He looked nervous, but excitedly so.

He wasn't anything like Jisung had expected, in fact, he was expecting quite the opposite of the boy in front of him.

He was expecting old, grumpy, white guy, not young, smiley, Asian guy.

When the boy spoke up, the first thing he did was _bow_. Jisung was quite taken aback, a quiet ‘oh’ slipping out of his mouth as a perfect 'annyeonghaseyeo' popped out of mystery boy's mouth along with it.

Seungmin said what we were all thinking, in English of course, "You are very good at speaking Korean." Seungmin almost sounded perfect when he spoke English something, that Jisung would always be impressed by.

The grey haired boy giggles in response to Seungmin's compliment, "Ah thank you," a surprising heavy Australian accent peaking through, however he shakes his head afterward, "But I'm Korean." Changbin, who had not previously been listening to the conversation, for lack of trying to comprehend, suddenly flicks his head to catch up when the man in front of them switches, to _fluent Korean_ mid sentence.

Woojin has raised eyebrows as well, feeling comfortable enough to speak Korean around the boy now, "Wait, you speak Korean?"

Chan smiles one of his bright proud smiles again, "Yep." He suddenly realizes he hasn't introduced himself yet, "Oh, uhm, I'm Chan, I'm in charge of driving you around, managing your whereabouts, and translating for you if needed, stuff like that." He trails off sheepishly looking at Woojin, eyes darting around the manager's face. Chan seemed very nervous, it wasn't necessarily bad, actually quite comforting to know that the man in front of him was just as spooked as he was. He was clearly young probably around the same age at the baseball players, so there was no way he was an extremely prominent person in his company, he lacked the professionalism and coldness that Jisung hated ever so much.

Jisung figured he would get along with Chan.

Woojin seems amazed by the situation, not expecting the level of care that the Los Angeles Angels put into welcoming the teams from Korea.

Chan simply ushers them into the shuttle helping them with their bags and doing a cute little waddle to the divers seat. Jisung was curious who put this absolute _ child_ in a position of even a small amount of power, he couldn't help but giggle at his antics.

Woojin, who was sitting in the passenger seat, seemed to be thinking the same thing, "So how did you get this job?"

The standard for speaking Korean in this car made Jisung almost forget he was in the United States, instead of driving to an ordinary away game in his home country.

Chan was trying to pull into the lane beside him and only could laugh nervously, "Well, I moved here from Australia for college, and I'm studying sports management so," he laughs, "For some reason they picked me to be an intern at LAA for the summer," he pauses, turning around again to search for a gap between the moving cars wide enough for him to pull into.

Jisung confusedly looks to Seungmin beside him, whispering discreetly to the boy, "The hell is LAA ?"

The dandy boy continues to watch Chan as he answers, "I think it stands for the Los Angeles Angels."

Jisung lets out a quiet ah of understanding, nodding his head while Changbin starts to snore lightly from the other side of him. He snickers at the older boy's position, head tilted back, mouth wide open.

Chan finally pulls into the lane, focusing on the road as he continues, "They probably picked me for this job because I speak Korean," he pauses changing lanes, "plus they tend go give the interns the less desirable jobs," Jisung watches his face contort into one of worry through the rear view mirror as he realizes what he said, "No-not that I don't want to be with you guys," he is looking in between the mirror at the boy's in the back and Woojin, nervously trying to correct himself, "It's just because I'm basically your chauffeur, I gotta take you to all your meals and I'll get home really really late, you know." He tries to smile but it comes out as more of a grimace.

Woojin finds the boy, hilarious, laughing brightly, Jisung would agree it was quite funny, but not _that_ funny.

He would talk to his manager about that later.

Woojin tries to calm the squirming boy's nerves, "I get what you're saying, don't worry, I wouldn't want to be responsible for these idiots if I wasn't getting paid either." He adds another chuckle at the end.

Chan smiles sheepishly, "I really am sorry, I'm not spectacular at expressing what I'm trying to say in Korean."

Woojin playfully hits the younger's arm, "Hey, you're doing a great job, you're amazing."

Seungmin nudges Jisung, giving him a look clearly saying he had caught on to the same situation forming between this intern and their boss. Jisung laughs quietly, as to not draw attention.

Seungmin silently mouths a "you're amazing" imitating Woojin with his big starstruck eyes and bringing his hands to his cheeks feigning an awed look.

Jisung struggles to keep his laughter quiet, hitting his friend's shoulder, "Only Woojin would fall in love with someone in another country," Seungmin whispers deviously, secretly bad mouthing his older friend.

Jisung giggles like a little kid, "What a sap."

—

Jisung wakes up to loud noises, he must have been asleep for more than half an hour. The car was moving terribly slow, presumably from traffic, the sleepy boy was still coming to when he discerned the sounds from all the shouting, it was definitely the sound of flashing cameras. Jisung finally picks his head up off of Seungmin's shoulder to see what was going on.

He first looks to Chan, who's face has drawn into a frown trying to navigate theough the people surrounding the car, "This usually doesn't happen."

That's when Jisung realizes the hold up is not because of traffic, but because of the copious amounts of paparazzi surrounding their car.

Now, Chan is right, this usually does _not_ happen, baseball isn't the kind of thing that gets a lot of media attention. But when the program was announced, it caused a huge stir in the sports community. Some were against it, some were excited, but good or bad, headlines were headlines, and the paparazzi were going to be all over it.

Of course none of the boys were expecting it, Chan wasn't, maybe Woojin was but either way it was first for all of them.

Chan has a deep set frown, trying to figure out how to navigate and were to park with the least possible issues. When he shifts into park he turns to look at the boy's in the back, "Okay, you guys ready for this?"

Changbin was still blinking awake trying to figure out where they were, squinting his eyes at the hotel and the reporters. Jisung nods his head even though he's undeniably nervous.

Chan smiles reassuringly, "Try to keep your head down, they're going to be asking a lot of questions, probably in English, so just try to get into the hotel as fast as possible."

Jisung must have a terribly nervous look on his face because Chan laughs lightly, "Welcome to Hollywood."

—

Jisung felt sad when Chan left.

He made him feel at home, (despite the reporters and cameras) but as soon as him and his team were alone with their luggage in a fancy American hotel lobby, he soon realized they were a long way from home.

Even just standing in the check in line, the hotel was nothing short of grandeur and modern, giant chandeliers and a grand piano decorating the area. And maybe if you squinted you could see a god damn koi pond around the corner, a royalty that Jisung was sure was very unnecessary in a hotel, but he was sure it would be nice to visit once or twice.

Han Jisung was stuck watching the luggage, waiting in line with Woojin to hopefully get to the room as soon as possible, jet lag was starting to kick in.

Seungmin and Changbin were screwing around on the piano, laughing and having fun, much to the lonely boy's dismay.

Changbin was fairly new to the Twins, traded from the Kiwoom Heroes, a pretty prestigious KBO team. He's an incredible batter and 3rd baseman, he was a little late to the game in comparison to others, but proved that he deserved to be there everyday. Guys who had been playing little league since they were four were sometimes shown up by the Changbin, he was no joke, especially with those biceps.

Not that Jisung was looking or anything, he just had a strong arm.

The problem the boy was facing however, was that he couldn't seem to click with him.

Seungmin and Changbin seemed to hit it off immediately. If you didn't really know them, it might have seemed like they hated each other. Seungmin was either the most loving friend you had or the most scary friend you had, there was no in between. His emotions ranged from a lovely cuddle to threatening a violent altercation with a deadly glare.

But as much as the two seemed to clash, they were building off each other, teasing each other as much as possible with the back and forth they had made for themselves.

They were friends, and Jisung just couldn't seem to find that in Changbin.

He couldn't wrap his head around him, something about him just didn't mix with him. He always seemed tired or angry, and always intimidating.

He was older, and better and _new_.

Jisung loved making friends, but it was so _hard_ to make himself likable to Changbin and it simply bothered him.

So yes, maybe being on luggage duty while his teammates had fun was a bit of a bummer.

Woojin wasn't much help either, the Doosan Bears team manager, a much older guy than Woojin, had found him not too long ago and they hadn't stopped talking since. From the snippets he heard he could tell that the two had to know each other well, very contradicting of the way the baseball players of each team conduct themselves when they're even close to each other.

They weren't fond of each other.

Jisung was mildly aware of the fact that that meant _Lee Know_ and his team were somewhere walking around the _same hotel_. But he simply chose to ignore it, because it did not effect him, right ?

Soon Jisung was at the front of the line, and Woojin had taken a break from catching up with his friend to tell Jisung he was the one who had to request the room keys. The way Woojin had put it was, you speak English for him, you get to room with him. Even the manager knew rooming with him was often times better than rooming with crackhead one and two Seungmin and Changbin.

The choice was simple.

Jisung was fairly proud of his ability to speak English, he had picked up a bit when he had studied in Malaysia, but as any language learner knows, it's still fucking scary when you're attempting conversation with a native speaker.

When the receptionist called the "next in line" Jisung assumed it was his turn. Woojin still followed him, which only made him more nervous, he tried to act confident when he was walking to the desk, head held high.

That's when he saw them.

More specifically _him_.

I mean it would make sense he would see them, walking in their little group, looking effortlessly badass, annoyingly so.

Jisung had lost all confidence he previously had by the time he had met eyes with Lee Know (it bothered him, he still didn't know his real name, this was something he was going to search tonight while he couldn't sleep).

The unnervingly hot man was smirking an evil smile, he obviously was not one to forget things so quickly, much to the squirrelly boy's dismay.

Jisung was watching them from across the room when the receptionist spoke up, "Hello? May I help you?"

Jisung quickly turned his head to the woman in front of him, a petite blonde girl, before flicking his head in Woojin's direction embarrassedly, looking at his managers raised eyebrows, "Ah, yes," he turns his head quickly back in the right direction, "Uh, we need to, uhm, rooms, please."

The girl smiles kindly, "What name would the rooms be under?" She was clearly very forgiving and understanding of the situation.

Jisung in the state he was in had basically forgot all of his English in the span of two seconds. However, he was doing this for some peaceful sleep, this was not promised if he roomed with his other teammates, "Uh, Kim Woojin, or uh, last name Kim."

His boss cutely raises his hand, smiling widely, adding a tiny "Me.", to the end before he moves to take out his ID.

The woman looks like she has fallen in love with him with that, and quite frankly, who wouldn't, "Of course," she pauses as she types in the name, starting to idly talking to Jisung, "There sure are a lot of baseball teams here today."

Jisung turns to find the Doosan bears messing around on a couch across the lobby, Lee Know laughing at something another teammate did. He looks over to Jisung as well, smiling still, joy written on his face. He wasn't sure but it almost seemed like he was smiling kindly at him, a form of a truce, but he was sure he was seeing things.

Jisung turned back to the receptionist who was placing the key cards onto the desk for him, "There sure are."

—


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heyo :)
> 
> next chapter !
> 
> I highly suggest you read this note all the way through, please and thank you :)
> 
> I realized I forgot to put my spiel in the first chapter, so I figured I’d do that now.
> 
> The members of Stray Kids are only serving as characters to portray the story and it does not reflect how they act in real life.
> 
> And MOST importantly, any Sports Teams mentioned in this story are not participating in any of the events, programs, or activities mentioned in this story and it's not representative on how they actually perform in real life! It is purely fictional!
> 
> My brother used to be a manager at a minor league baseball team where a group (I'm not sure on the specifics) had paid the minor league team a lot of money (who wasn't doing that well) to take in a large amount of its players. This was to improve the players and get them acclimated to longer playing seasons (because they are much shorter in China) for the Olympics. That's what this story line is shaped around.
> 
> This does not mean that any teams I mention in this story will or would ever do this, it's simply much easier to use names people are familiar with.

Jisung was sure the first day of a new job had to be terrifying to anyone, but he just knew nothing could ever top going into the Los Angeles Angels baseball stadium to practice with the big leagues (and a fucked up sleep schedule).

He felt like he was walking on air, he was shaking with nerves, he couldn't get the idea of playing with the Halos out of his head.

He could feel it to his core, he knew something would just _have _to go wrong today. Jisung _not_ royally fucking up would be something short of a miracle.

Woojin wasn't surprised he had to drag Jisung out of bed, in fact it was quite common, but long after he was out of bed and slowly sipping his coffee he still wasn't moving. He was standing in the corner of the room, clutching his cheap hotel room coffee tightly in his hands, Woojin was worried he might break the styrofoam cup if he clung any harder. Jisung almost looked like a crazy person, staring off at the floor, wide eyed and tapping his foot.

Woojin had to take the cup calmly out of his hands and pull him into a hug, saying something about doing it for his team, and that he didn't need to worry.

Even now, when Chan's bright smile pulled up shuttle and all, Jisung was still a little shaken, but functional still.

A nice shower and a few more pep talks from Woojin and Seungmin made him at least slightly human, and maybe if you squinted you could see him smile at Chan before he got into the shuttle.

Changbin shuffles slightly in the seat next to him, done looking out the window for the morning. He spots a sleepy Seungmin holding Jisung's hand, and recognizes the situation.

Jisung cannot confirm or deny that he jumps when Changbin speaks to him in the silent car. Seungmin was already nodding off again, the only one who still refused to drink coffee out of the lot and Chan and Woojin were quietly chatting, talking about the beauty of the cloudy grey morning, something only a 6am car trip could bring to the table.

"Hey, I know you're nervous," he has a comforting look on his face, something Jisung is sure he's never seen before, "but it's going to be okay, no matter what happens today, we're still a team, and that means when it comes down to the wire we'll all still have to be there for eachother," he chuckles quietly, not to break the tiny silence barrier in the car, "even the damn Doosan bears."

Jisung chuckles looking down and his twiddling hands, Changbin comfortingly places and hand on the younger's knee, "And if anyone tries to make you feel out of place, I will personally beat their ass."

Jisung giggles brightly, "I don't know if I'm worried about picking a fight with anyone," he sighs, trying to let out his anxiety, "I guess I'm just worried that I won't be good enough for everyone else."

Changbin has genuine look of care on his face, almost a sweet look, "Don't say that."

Jisung starts to spiral, mumbling and messing with his fingers some more, "There's going to be so many amazing American players, people I could only dream of playing with, and did you hear that the Doosan Bears are bringing that one kid Yang Jeo-"

The older cuts him off before he can psych himself out even more, "Hey, hey, what the hell are you even talking about?" Changbin makes the younger look him in the eyes, Jisung pouts, "But he's a prodigy."

Changbin sighs and leans back against the car seat more, "You know when I was traded to the twins, I was this nervous my first day too?"

Jisung raises his eyebrows, large curious eyes, "Really?"

Changbin laughs quietly, "Yeah, I was worried that because I was older and less experienced you might look down on me, like previous teams had," he playfully punches the younger's shoulder, "and you see how that turned out."

Jisung smiles to himself, he tries to think about what he can say to Changbin, for making him feel so much better, and he finds that it was simple, "Thank you, Hyung."

Changbin laughs at the serious moment theyre having, "Oh shut up, it was nothing." He smiles softly, "You know you got a lot more to you than I thought, kid."

Jisung laughs quietly, turns to look away from his hands again, and at the older, "Yeah?"

Changbin laughs too, "Yeah, I'd never seen you _not _happy, always telling a joke, always making a new friend, but never like this, vulnerable, _real_."

Jisung smiles softly at the statement, "I guess I should work on that then."

Changbin pushes the younger's shoulder, as if to tell him he's messing with him, knocking him into a sleeping Seungmin, waking him up rudely.

The two youngest fight briefly, giggling like little kids and livening up the car.

Suddenly today didn't seem like such a hurdle, in fact it seemed quite possible.

—

"Good morning, everyone, welcome to Spring Training."

Jisung was shitting himself.

Spring Training was a big deal in the MLBs, but for those who aren't fans of baseball, they might not know. During the couple months before the start of the regular season, MLB teams play a series of exhibition games and practices to let current players prepare for the upcoming season and allow new players to try out for roster and position spots. Full with early morning practices and games by the afternoon, the Angels host their spring training at the Tempe Diablo stadium in Arizona. KBO teams sometimes spent a few days of their own Spring Training in the states, but never where they actually a part of the whole experience that was MLB Spring Training. This year however the KBO was specifically paying for its players participation in Spring Training, and that wasn't to be taken lightly.

As much as Jisung thought he was over his nerves, as soon as he was on the field with _all stars_, plenty of hopeful new players and the Los Angeles Angels _coach_, he was pretty sure he lost his ability to stand.

There had to be about 40 boys here, most standing next to those they knew, whispering in anticipation.

The Doosan bears stood off to the side, opposite of Jisung and his team, probably intentionally. The squirrelly boy tested himself to see if he recognized all the players, glancing around at the boys while the coach talked briefly.

Of course, he recognized Minho first, he drew his eyes easily. He was also glad he looked up his real name the night before because his real name rolled off the tongue much easier than some made up baseball name. There was a boy standing next to him, whispering and snickering, Jisung wasn't sure he remembered his name but he knew Seungmin had spent many a day relaying to his friend about how _hot_ this boy was. Which I mean he wasn't lying, but Jisung was sure he he wasn't his type.

Then his eyes were drawn to one of the players he was looking forward to seeing the most, Yang Jeongin, or on the baseball field, I.N.

He had a stupid baseball name too, but however Jisung _knew_ who this kid was.

At the beginning of the year there was a huge debacle about who would end up with Yang Jeongin, a modern day baseball prodigy. Teams had been watching him since he was pitching upper 80 mph fastballs at 14, and as soon as he turned 19, KBO teams were dying to get their hands on him. Of course, he ended up signing with the Doosan bears, the team he had been watching since he was old enough to go to games. But now, he was _here_, and it couldn't have been more than a couple months since he was signed and he was already up with the big leagues.

He cranes his neck to look at the other players, the ones on the official Angels roster. He could probably name all of the players on the team, but there were a few honorable mentions. One recently traded from the Toronto Blue Jays, Kevin Moon, a young Korean-Canadian player born in Gwanju and raised in Vancouver. He was particularly interesting to Jisung from the beginning of his career to now, as he slowly makes his way up the ladder.

Then there was Mark Tuan, who Jisung was sure he would piss his pants if he was to talk to him. LA born and raised, made his own way up to the tops of baseball ranks as a right fielder, loyal to his team, and known for being an Asian-American baseball activist.

A true legend.

Jisung was snapped out of his thoughts by the coach, well and done with him not paying attention, "Han!"

It was short and stern, but very coach like, something he could appreciate. He also would take note that he used his baseball name, instead of his real one, (which, in retrospect, he really couldn't tell if it was because he knew his baseball name or if he was just calling him by his "last name").

Jisung had to snap his head away from gawking at his role models to pay attention to the coach, "Uh, yes?" It was stilted, but it sounded fine, he was sure.

"Han, right?" The coach was glancing at a clipboard, most likely his cheat sheet, names pronunciations, etc.

Jisung feels bad for not listening, not only because it was disrespectful but the fact that this could put a target on his back in the future, "Yes, Sir."

The coach only nods, waving it off, not looking to scold anyone, studying the clipboard more before he looks up at his team, "All I ask is that when you're practicing, when you _here_, you make sure you're here. Body and mind. What happens outside this stadium is none of my business, but you're associated with the Halos now, and you have a name to withhold."

The coach takes away his serious tone with a tight smile, "Alright then," he claps his hands together like a classic coach, "And uh," he lifts a hand gesturing to a certain Kevin Moon, "ask Kevin if you have no idea what the hell I'm saying." The field is lit up with light laughter this early in the morning. The coach seems pleased to start the day off right, coaches who truly love their job make better mentors, Jisung could see that in him.

"Oh and, where's that ball boy..." Coach looks around, towards the dugout, "Felix!" Jisung watches as a blonde head peaks up from out of the dugout, clearly standing up from hearing the coach calling him, but unsure if he was just hearing things. He watches with big eyes, until the coach yells again, "Come on, get over here!" The boy looks a lot like most ball boys, young and awkward, sprinting to where's he's called. He runs up the steps and out of the dugout as soon as the coach yells at him, stopping himself next to the man with a slight bounce, a sign of the boy's agility.

Jisung hears the coach attempting to discreetly ask this kid if he's Korean, he watches Felix realize he's standing in front of a hoard of baseball players all with their eyes on him, he almost seems to collapse on himself not liking the attention, "Uh, yes sir, but-" the coach cuts him off before he can finish, "Great introduce yourself to the new guys, you'll be seeing them a lot."

Felix bites his lip nervously, the hands behind his back secretly clasped together anxiously. He's quieter the next time he speaks, Jisung almost doesn't hear him, "But, Coach-" he cuts him off again, "Come on, Felix, we don't have all day."

Felix clears his throat, a surprisingly deep voice erupting. He starts off strong with his Korean, bowing and everything, "Uh, hello, my name is," he sighs, looking up at the sky for answers, " Felix, my name is Felix."

Jisung hears a quiet laugh from beside him, it obviously wasn't the best the language has ever been said, but it really wasn't that bad. Jisung hears Changbin whisper out a subconscious, "cute" along with his giggle. Jisung turns to look at him surprised, Changbin only smiles bigger shamelessly acknowledging what he said, "What?" Jisung and Changbin try to stifle their laughter as to not interrupt.

Felix looks like he's frustrated now, furrowed brows, he switches back to English, a heavy Australian accent decorating his speech, "Look, my Korean-" he stops himself and looks at his coach, "I'm awful at speaking Korean."

The coach looks dismayed, he pats his shoulder, feeling awkward for forcing him to do something he obviously tried to warn him about, "That's alright, Lix." He talks to him like he made a bad play, a forced tight lipped smile on his face.

Felix scurries back to the dugout as soon as possible, probably where he's most comfortable. Jisung couldn't help but feel bad, but he was watches Changbin's eyes trace the young boys path, stupid smile on his face.

Two saps on our hands.

In Jisung's opinion, a field is no place to fall in love, he would never.

—

Today started out simple, coach split people off into groups of two for some catch to get warmed up. Jisung was paired up with some guy on the angels team, the coach's goal was to make his players make some new friends but as great as he was at pitching, he did not speak a drip of Korean, which is understandable.

There were however a couple guys on either side throwing to their partner that he _knew_ spoke Korean. One was Kevin, he had been talking to him idly while he threw back and forth with his partner, to say he was hilarious was an understatement, and he could easily imagine being friends with him in the future.

The other guy however, he was unsure of his name still, he knew it was the guy Seungmin and fallen for 10 times over in lust. He had prince like black hair, something his friend swooned over, and a strong arm.

Jisung debated saying hi, finding out his name maybe, something made him unsure, though he didn't quite know what it was.

Soon, in the midst of his hesitation, Jisung watched the throw from mystery boy's partner, some young guy, travel a little bit too far to his right coming more towards Jisung.

He figured he was being nice, better to have _someone_ catch it than for it to land on the ground, right?

As soon as Jisung began to offer the ball back to the player next to him, he snatched it out of his hand, with a passive aggressive "thanks". He didn't look thankful, he looked more angry, glare and furrowed brow painting his face.

Jisung raises his eyebrows is surprise, not expecting the attitude from the player beside him, the squirrelly knew the boy could make his blood boil, but he figured arguing his first day wasn't worth it. He can't help the snippy tone that peers through his words, "Sorry, I was only trying to help."

He scoffs, "Yeah, well, thanks, but I didn't need your help." He punctuates his sentence by throwing an especially strong pitch to his partner.

Jisung catches his life own partners throw, momentarily stunned by the boy's venom, mouth open slightly, "It's not a big deal, dude." He throws the ball back to his partner, slightly pissed by the attitude coming off this baby.

"I could have caught it, instead you caught it plus you're just being an asshole."

Jisung couldn't believe what he was hearing, the _audacity _of this kid, his eyes open wide letting his words hit him, he furrows his brows, body turning completely to face the other, "I'm sorry, what?"

There's an incredulous look on Jisung's face, clenching his fist around the baseball, trying to stay calm.

Mystery boy starts to stalk closer to Jisung, provoking a fight. This guy may piss the squirrelly boy off, but getting into a fight on his first day of Spring Training wasn't worth this bullshit.

Jisung's eyes are drawn to the other boy's teammates running over from across the field, probably to back up their friend, while _asshole #1_ starts flapping his mouth again, "Did I stutter? You're being an ass."

Jisung looks back at the douchebag, looking him straight in the eyes, "The fuck man, I haven't done shit to you."

Hyunjin advances again, getting up in Jisung's face, trying to intimidate him, "The fuck you haven't, you've been bitchy this whole time."

As soon as he's done talking, he's whipped back by the shoulder, away from Jisung. The squirrelly boy notices its Minho, furrowed brow, "Hyunjin, leave him alone."

_Hyunjin_, that's his fucking name.

Minho looks angry, but not surprised, this Hyunjin kid is probably a stuck up brat with anger issues.

Jisung watches Minho's gaze shift to himself, looking him up and down a couple times, intense look in his eyes, probably sizing him up, "It's not worth it."

His eyes stay on him, watching intently as he turns Hyunjin around to take him away from the confrontation. When he finally turns around completely, Jisung felt like he could finally breathe.

He let out a breath he didn't know he was holding, clenching his fist around the baseball before throwing a deadly pitch, releasing his pent up frustration.

Jisung hears his partner, yelling to him in English, obviously having watched the whole debacle, "You okay, dude?"

Jisung rubs his temples, sighing, he looks up to reassure his partner, "Yeah, I'm fine man."

Jisung jumps when he feels a hand on his shoulder, whipping himself around, probably ready for a fight, adrenaline still pumping in his veins.

The first thing he sees is tufts of pink hair, something rare on the baseball field, meaning it could only be the one and only I.N.

He looks almost scared, awkward, but mostly apologetic, "Hey, I'm sorry about Hyunjin, he's incredibly stubborn, doesn't like help from other people."

Jisung couldn't imagine staying around the kid in front of him, "Oh, yeah, it's fine I'm already over it."

Jeongin smiles awkwardly, "He's not usually like that, promise."

Jisung nods, not sure how much he believes that, "I'm sure he isn't."

The older can't see where else the conversation could go from there so he, starts to turn his attention back to his partner.

"Hey, tomorrow me, Minho and Hyunjin are going in for early work at the batting cages, I'll be throwing some pitches, it'll be a fun way to start the day, plus hopefully a clean slate with Hyunjin."

Jisung opens and closes his mouth, at a loss of words. As much as he'd love to work with Jeongin, he wasn't sure he up to having to interact with Hyunjin quite yet. Plus things were still very cold and professional between him and Minho, "Oh, uh, I don't know."

Jeongin looks like he's begging him at this point, big puppy eyes and all, "You can bring a friend?"

Jisung isn't sure if it's the offer or the eyes that gets to him but either way he says yes, "Yeah, okay, I could use some extra practice."

Jeongin cheers, "Great, I'll ask Minho."

Jisung's mouth opens, shocked by the admission, "Wait you haven't asked yet? Now it just sounds like I've invited myself. What if he says no?"

Jeongin laughs it off with a wave of a hand, "It's fine, he'll say yes, Minho always says yes."

The younger begins to sprint in the direction of his team, full of youthful energy, and bounding.

Jisung chuckles amusedly, watching the kid, he yells at him before he's left hearing range, "You're absolutely crazy!"

Jeongin starts to run backwards in order to respond, huge smile on his face, "It's my charm!"

Jisung laughs again, turning his attention back to his partner throwing a few pitches back and forth. When he looks back to the younger standing with his team, he turns to find Minho looking back at the squirrelly boy, he has a ghost of a smirk on his face, lighting up his features. He obviously listening to Jeongin's proposal, nodding his head every once in a while, while Jeongin's mouth moves a mile a minute relaying the information.

When Jeongin stops talking, Minho turns back to the kid, smiling brightly. Jisung can see him nod his head, and he feels his cheeks heat up belatedly from the staring, he looks back down at his glove tossing the ball between his hands.

When he looks back up, Minho is taking one final gaze, ending spectacularly with a smirk.

He doesn't look away until he hears the coach calling everyone over to regroup and begin the real practice.

Jisung doesn't have time to process much else, but one thing does pass his mind.

Fucking Lee Minho.

—

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heyo !
> 
> hope you enjoyed !
> 
> sorry there isn’t a lot going on in this chapter, a lot of this chapter focused on character building and creation of friendships. 
> 
> sorry if you were disappointed with the lack of minsung in this chap, but I promise that it’s coming. their relationship develops relatively slowly, but it’s worth it in the end, thank you for being understanding.
> 
> and with that I welcome any and all feedback :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey :)
> 
> so I took a week off out of respect for woojin and everything that’s happened. I guess what I really need to say is woojin will not be taken out of this fic. I’m a bit conflicted about the future, but it’s always nine or none. 
> 
> So please enjoy, sorry for the wait :)

Yesterday nights victory was nothing spectacular, in fact the Angels were down by a run for most of the game, only pulling through in the last couple of innings, winning very narrowly by one run. It was mostly played by the guys on the official Angels roster, probably not betting the first game of Spring Training on some new guys.

Jisung didn't end up playing, but Changbin did, and pretty well at that.

However the next morning was rough for the dark boy, he didn't want to get out of bed, he was sore and tired, which usually didn't happen to the older.

Against Woojin's requests, Chan promised to come pick up Changbin a bit later, after he had already dropped off Jisung and Seungmin for early work.

Jisung was nervous.

It was a different type of nervous though.

Granted, it wasn't that uncommon for Jisung, he spent 95% of his time worrying, but today he felt uneasy, sick.

Yesterday, he was excitedly nervous, something that comes from the anxiety of trying something new, the fear of messing up.

But today, no, he felt queasy. Physically upset.

Jisung loves making new friends, and absolutely couldn't wait to talk to Jeongin more, but Jesus Christ he was going to hang out with the guy he almost punched. And the fact that he would probably piss himself if Minho even looked at him the wrong way, didn't make him much more excited.

Jisung and Seungmin were walking into the locker room, bags full of gear and cleats. The Bears had beat them there already having set their bags down and starting to get ready.

Hyunjin was tying up his cleats, meticulously, might he add, and very tight. As soon as he looked up you could see the distaste form on his face before he hung his head to seem consumed in tying his laces. Minho was in the middle of going through his locker when looked up and found the two friends walking in, he looked like he might say something, mouth open slightly, but soon Jeongin was greeting them much more enthusiastically.

He looks up from his phone, suddenly jumping up from his seat at the bench, as he recognizes them, "Hey! I'm glad you came."

He comes over and gives Jisung a hug, friendly, and not necessarily rejected, but surprising for sure. Jisung was not one to shy away from skin-ship, but he had known Jeongin about a day and they were already in the hugging stage.

Jeongin comes out of the hug immediately going to greet Seungmin, smiling cutely, "Hi, I'm Jeongin, you might know me as I.N."

Seungmin lights up, thrilled by the younger's attitude, "Hey, yeah, I know you, you're like baseball royalty by now."

Jeongin laughs bashfully, blushing, never fully knowing how to take a compliment, "I wouldn't say that, I'm no where near that yet."

Seungmin looks like he's gonna argue with him, sort of a 'no you' situation when Jisung directs his attention to the other boys in the room. Hyunjin looked disinterested, scrolling through his phone, typing every once in a while. Minho looked like he finally found what he was looking for, what seemed to be a shirt.

The older looked back to find Jisung's eyes on him, he catches his stare immediately, and smiles, a friendly smile, one to tell him he shouldn't be intimidated. This soon ends as Minho smile contorts into that of a smirk, turning back around to his locker and taking off his shirt.

It was stupid, it was juvenile, and something Jisung swore for never do in a locker room.

The locker room was a part of his place of work, a place to be professional. If he was to be gay, and a baseball player, his personal life and his work life absolutely _had _to be separate. Yet as soon as Minho's shirt left his back, Jisung almost fell forward as he watched his shoulder muscles flex. It wasn't even a classic point of attraction like that of abs or biceps, but Jisung had to have stared for a solid minute.

Jisung was ashamed of himself, it was so _childish_ and _cliche_, it was a sign of lack of self control on his end, and for that he was guilty.

The only thing that made him feel better was that Minho didn't seem to notice. By the time he had slipped back on his shirt Seungmin and Jeongin had stopped talking and the youngest had begun to introduce the other two, "Okay so, this is Hyunjin Hyung, you might already know him," Jisung hears Seungmin gasp quietly from beside him while Jeongin sheepishly adds the last part. The boy looks down remembering the events of yesterday and the threatened fight, "Oh! And this is Minho hyung, best second baseman a team could ask for, and an _amazing_ batter." The youngest punctuates this with slinging his arm around the older's shoulders, showing an obvious friendship between the two.

Minho lets out an _attractive_ chuckle, smiling and shaking his head, "I wouldn't say that."

He was princely, humble, attractive, and fucking talented.

And Jesus what is Jisung thinking.

Jeongin unwraps his arm from his friend, "We're gonna go ahead and warm up while you guys change, we'll be in the second batting cage."

Jisung and Seungmin both are silent as they watch the boys leave. As soon as the door clicks closed, Jisung let's out a breath he suddenly realized he was holding, he sits down on the bench hunched over like he ran two laps.

Seungmin rushes over to sit next to him, getting in his face anxiously, "Are you crazy? _Why_ wouldn't you tell me _Hwang Hyunjin _was coming?" He's got a bewildered look in his eyes, absolutely terrified of being in the same space as his stupid crush.

Jisung scoffs, laughing, "You mean the one who tried to fight me yesterday?" The older gets up to begin changing, laughing and shaking his head at the humor of the situation.

Seungmin follows his friend with his gaze, eyes wide with surprise , "Wait, what?"

Jisung takes out his uniform and cleats, he finds it quite humorous really, "Yeah, the guy you've been drooling over for years is actually a stuck up asshole, surprise."

Seungmin looks disappointed, understandably, "Oh," he stands up from the bench, sticking his hands in his pockets, trying to seem unbothered, "Yeah, I should've known, it's always the hot ones."

Seungmin quickly tries to busy himself by starting to gather his clothes, Jisung looks at him worriedly, he didn't like when his friend was sad, "You okay?"

Seungmin is messing with the button on the shirt he was going to put on, "Yeah, yeah, no I'm fine, I didn't even know him."

Jisung slips on his shirt and then he furrows his eyebrows, "Yeah but you've had your eye on him for a while, it's perfectly valid for you to be a little disappointed."

Seungmin watches his friend lace up his cleats, "Yeah, I guess," he suddenly smiles, "probably dodged a bullet with that one."

Jisung laughs, glad Seungmin isn't too upset as he finishes tying his cleats, "Damaged pretty boys aren't part of our schedule anyway."

Jisung walks over to place an arm around his friends shoulder who still hasn't changed, "Now hurry up and get changed, I can't wait for you to she how much of a prick this guy is so you can stop being sad about him."

Seungmin only laughed, pushing off his friends arm.

—

Hyunjin was _not_ a prick to Seungmin.

And it bothered Jisung _terribly_.

One minute he was telling his best friend that this guy was an asshole, someone that wasn't worth his time. The next, Hyunjin is giving him a turn to bat before him, picking up his helmet for him, giving him _the eyes_.

It was like he was a different person.

A two-faced bitch that's who he was.

Well, Jisung wouldn't say that to his face, but he was definitely thinking it.

Jisung was leaning against the metal fence of the batting cages, rather grumpily at that, arms crossed, watching Hyunjin bat. Seungmin was watching rather intently from inside the cage, cheering him on and talking idly with him.

Jisung turned around preferring to look at anything than the relationship forming between his best friend and the guy that almost punched him yesterday.

Jeongin had gone out with Kevin to warm up his arm before he started pitching today, both pitchers had formed a bond first day of Spring training when they were partners.

The batting cages were no where close to empty, many other players going in for early work as well, a common practice in the major leagues, but Jisung still jumped slightly when he noticed Minho walking over to lean against the batting cages next to him.

"Something bothering you?" He was looking at Jisung very intently, something the younger noticed he did quite often. 

"Jesus, Minho, you scared me." The squirrelly boy held his heart, looking at the older with wide eyes.

Jisung watches Minho's smile form into a smirk, "So you know my name?"

The younger rolls his eyes at the cockiness rolling off this guy, "Yeah, I've heard of you." Jisung tries to play it cool, knowing if he brakes his façade his knees might buckle.

Minho only hums, a sign that he was quiet, only saying things when he needed to, never more, never less, "So whats got you all grouchy for?"

Jisung doesn't say anything, he only turns his head and shrugs, not wanting to tell a man he had never said a word to his problems, ones that he probably had no reason to be angry about.

He feels a finger direct his chin back to face Minho. Jisung didn't know how to feel, angry because of this dude's attitude, or flattered because of the attention.

"You know, frowning causes wrinkles." Minho smiles cheekily, he does have a nice smile, he'll give him that.

Jisung rolls his eyes, tired of the man's persistence, "Are you always this nosy?"

Minho laughs, more of a chuckle, "Only when I think the person is worth talking to."

Jisung looks down, shaking his head. As much he's annoying, Minho is insanely cute, and he can't help but smile. He knows exactly what to say, and he's nothing like the serious mask he puts on to strangers.

Maybe he could tell him what's wrong, there was no harm.

Jisung looks back up, immediately falling back into the older's strong gaze. He looks at him when he's talking to him, very intently, almost to show him he's listening, something that Jisung noticed very quickly.

He sighs before glancing at the boys in the batting cage, "I don't know if you noticed the romantic comedy going on back there, but it's driving me nuts."

Minho turns around to look at Hyunjin and Seungmin laughing and flirting very obviously, "And that's bad why?"

Jisung gave the older an unimpressed look, not surprised at how slow the older is, "Oh, I don't know, maybe I'm not thrilled about the fact that my best friend and the guy who tried to fight me yesterday are probably gonna be fucking by the end of the day."

Minho laughs, a beautiful thing, bright and airy, "Ohh, that makes a lot more sense than what I was thinking."

Jisung furrows his eyebrows, trying to follow the older's train of thought, "What were you thinking?"

Minho waves it off, "Oh no it was nothing."

Jisung slightly shoves the man next to him, something that was probably bold for having just met him, but oddly he felt like they'd been friends forever, "C'mon you gotta tell me now."

Minho rolls his eyes, laughing, "I thought you were jealous or something."

Jisung's eyes widen in surprise, laughing, it was humorous, utterly hilarious, "Of them? Oh god, no way in hell I would fall in love with one of these dudes, too dim witted. When I find the one there's no way he's gonna be in baseball."

Jisung realizes what he says belatedly, he wasn't really concerned, Minho seemed like a cool dude, but sometimes you can never tell. Jisung watches for the older's next move intently, hoping to not get a bad reaction.

Minho is silent for a few seconds, looking at the ground in front of him. Jisung can see the wheels turning planning what to say next, "So you're gay?"

And there it was.

Usually this meant bad things, usually this meant interrogation and hesitation, hidden disgust. No one would actually be homophobic to his face, but it's hard to mask the distaste.

Jisung flushes, he cant just lie, "I mean, yeah, but it's not something I exactly broadcast."

Minho nods, still looking away, head leaning back against the chain link fence of the batting cages, just like his body, "Same."

Jisung blushes more, finding out something like this makes him rosy cheeked and embarrassed, though he's not sure why. He stays silent taking in the information, maybe he misunderstood, now he needed to clarify.

"So you're..." Jisung doesn't get to finish, Minho nods throughout the whole thing, the younger didn't feel the need to finish the question.

Jisung's blush hangs on his cheeks, he wishes it would go away in case Minho decided to look away from whatever he was staring and look back at the squirrelly boy again.

It was weird talking to Minho yet not having his gaze on him, he was used to it now, maybe he missed it.

Suddenly Minho stands up from leaning on the fence and faces the boy, he looks at Jisung's downcast gaze, almost like he's waiting for the younger to find his eyes again.

When Jisung looks up, Minho gets one last look at him before he speaks up, intense gaze back to normal, "See you around, Jisung."

He's walking away from the batting cages before the younger realizes it, he scrambles up off the fence to a standing position, yelling at the older, "Where are you going?"

He doesn't answer.

Jisung finds it annoying how full on Minho can be one minute, and how cold he can be the next.

Bipolar ass.

Jisung crosses his arms, grumpy once again, he hadn't even realized how much his mood had lifted since he began talking to Minho, however he was back at square one.

Jisung turns to a love sick smiley Seungmin calling out to him, it was his turn to bat.

All Jisung could think about was that he wished Minho was here to see him bat, but he guessed there was plenty of time for that.

—

After practice that day they had an hour for lunch before they loaded the bus and drove to the away game for the night. Jisung would like to think he had gotten quite used to the schedule rather quickly, however the seating aspect had thrown him for a loop.

The previous night was a home game, there was no need to bus over to another stadium, but tonight they were playing the Chicago Red Sox.

As soon as he got on the bus he was at a loss of where to sit. Seungmin was sitting with Hyunjin, go figure, Jeongin was sitting with Kevin, Woojin was sitting with Chan.

Jisung still wasn't sure about how he felt sitting next to Changbin, in all honesty he felt he'd rather sit alone than with the older. They may have had a moment, but he didn't want to feel like he was intruding, he almost always sat by himself, he must want it to stay that way.

Jisung plopped himself in one of the seats in an empty row, it was near the middle. He of course knew there were other guys that still needed to board, some who would show up late, but he felt embarrassed that he had to sit by himself. He was so used to being the bubbly kid who had all the friends, he didn't like seeming like a loner, maybe it was the way he grew up.

Jisung opted for looking out the window, preferring looking like he was busy rather than an anxious mess.

Jisung felt a presence at the aisle, somebody waiting, hesitating maybe. The squirrelly boy turns his head to see the ball boy, the one who was forced to speak a language he didn't know in front of 50 baseball players. He already seemed shy, he can't imagine what that must've been like for him. Jisung opens his mouth to say something but the boy beats him to it, "Oh, uh, annyeonghaseyo."

Jisung is momentarily stunned by the fact that Felix is speaking korean after the fiasco that went on yesterday, "Oh, annyeonghaseyo."

Felix who's still standing awkwardly in the aisle speaks up again, still in Korean, "Can I sit here?"

Jisung pauses, trying to process the request, it probably seems like he doesn't want him to. To make up for it he responds probably too enthusiastically, "Oh yes! Of course."

Jisung can only watch Felix sit down, still kind of surprised by this interaction.

The boy is obviously shy, and he seems quite uncomfortable speaking in this foreign language, however he's speaking quite well. Felix's shoulders are stiff, still feeling uncomfortable, he only stares at the back of the seat in front of him, picking at a loose string on his shorts.

Jisung realizes he's should probably say something, he's always the outgoing one, this usually isn't a problem for him, plus Felix seems to be understanding what he's saying pretty well.

The Australian suddenly turned to the boy next to him, having built up enough courage to start up a conversation, "So how old are you?"

Jisung is quick to respond, smiling as an attempt to seem friendly instead of the weirdo look he's giving off, "Ah I'm twenty." Jisung notes that this wasn't exactly something people asked so soon in America as they did in Korea, but Felix still asked.

Felix smiles, trying to relax a bit, "Ah I'm 19, or wait, I guess in Korean age I would be 20 too," Felix smiles genuinely, realizing something, "so we're the same age."

Jisung finds the boy's excitement in this discovery adorable, the sunshine radiating out of this guy was unbelievable, "When's your birthday?"

Felix turns over the question in his head, Jisung had noticed that the boy spoke and thought slowly, as to not say the wrong thing.

"Ah, September 15."

Jisung gasp dramatically, eyes wide, gaining back his charisma as he slowly starts to feel more comfortable with the boy, "Oh for real? Mine in the 14th of September."

Felix's mouth forms an open mouth smile, genuine surprise and happiness grace his face. He says it in English before he realizes it, heavy Australian accent and all, "Oh that's so dope."

Jisung doesn't want him to think he can't speak English around him, so before Felix can even try to say it in Korean, Jisung parrots him, "It is dope, bro."

Felix smiles at the boy's English, feeling more and more comfortable, "Ah you're good at English."

Jisung laughs, finding this humorous, "That's a stretch," he playfully hits Felix on the shoulder, "but you're so good at Korean."

The multilingual boys had already switched back to korean before they even knew it. Felix blushes not being able to take a compliment, “I try,” he picks at the string on his shorts again, shyly speaking up, “I’ve been learning Korean for about a year now, to, you know, get more in touch with my culture,” Felix looks up to smile at his new acquaintance, “so its means a lot to hear that.”

Jisung nods his head, “You’re so good though, why did you say you couldn’t speak Korean yesterday?”

The Aussie blushes deeply, remembering one of the most embarrassing moments of his life, “I uh, I’m not very good at speaking in front of crowds of people,” he laughs sadly as he continues to pick at the string on his shorts, a habit of his, “it was like as soon as I got out in front of all of those guys I forgot everything I ever knew, coach wasn’t helping much either.”

Jisung places a friendly hand on the boys shoulder, “Hey that’s okay, I would probably be nervous too.”

Felix gives a small smile to the squirrelly boy, he appreciates him listening, even if it’s just a bit.

Jisung doesn’t want the conversation to end, he thinks Felix is really cool, he just knows once you get past his shy demeanor he’s a crackhead, “So you’re from Australia?”

Felix laughs, “Oh yeah, I guess you heard my accent earlier,” he gestures to Bang Chan sitting near the front laughing with Woojin, “Me and Chan hyung are actually from around the same area.”

Jisung nods his head, letting out an ‘oh’ of understanding, letting Felix continue, “I’m interning here this summer before I go back to UCLA, I’m interning as an athletic trainer here because I’m doing pre-med.”

Jisung tries to hide his confusion, but he was never good at hiding his expressions. Felix seems to catch on, a look of distaste on his face, “Being the ball boy comes with the job, but what I’m really here to do is wrap up injuries, help pitchers stretch their arms, get them warmed up, stuff like that. The coach just calls me the ball boy though, but you know that’s okay.”

Jisung furrows his brow, “Hey that’s not okay, he’s discrediting you, you’re a smart adult not some kid who wants to run around on the field.”

Felix shrugs, seeming to have accepted it already, “He’s the coach, who am I to tell him he’s wrong.”

Jisung nods, “But, hey, that means I’ll be seeing you even more often.”

Felix smiles brightly, happy to have made a new friend, something he sometimes struggled with, “Yeah and if you’re ever sore and want to stop by the training room there’s always an intern dying to do some medical work for a change.”

Jisung smiles in awe, the boy was so much more than he thought, maybe he could understand Changbin a little more, “I will definitely keep that in mind.”

Then the baseball player notices Felix looking at something. Jisung follows his gaze to Chan and Woojin laughing, flirting really. Jisung furrows his brow at the boy staring at the two.

Felix suddenly speaks up, “Do you think Chan and that guy will get together?”

Jisung is taken aback, “Oh you mean Woojin? I mean yeah, it seems like it.”

Felix returns to the string on his shorts, picking incessantly, turning something over in his head. The squirrelly boy hesitated to ask, “Why, is there something wrong?”

The Australian tries to dismiss it, tries to write it off as nothing, “Oh it’s nothing it’s just a stupid crush, I don’t know.”

Something must have snapped in his mind as he furrows his eyebrows, maybe a little angrily, “It’s just I’ve been trying so hard to get his attention and he only ever thinks of me as a friend but then this guy over here just waltzes in here and Chan is infatuated. All I ever hear is about this guy, Woojin you said was his name?”

Jisung only nods, letting the boys surprise outburst continue, “It just gets tiring after while, emotionally draining, to hear about him- and I’m realizing I’m ranting about all my problems to a guy I just met. I’m so sorry.”

Jisung is quite taken aback by the boys outburst, but rubs his shoulder supportively nonetheless, “That’s okay, this is what extremely new friends are for.”

Felix laughs sadly, appreciating the laugh, “I don’t know, I guess he just thinks of me as a child.”

The baseball player hits the Aussie’s shoulder playfully, “Hey that’s not true, you just need a new man to get you out of the friend zone and laid.”

Felix blushes at the boys crude statement, “I don’t know about that one.”

Jisung shushes him, “Shup up, I’m finding you a rebound as we speak.”

The squirrelly boy quite obviously searches the bus seeing if he can find anyone that had at least a couple gay rumors. There was Seungmin, but he was quite obviously wrapped around Hyunjin’s bitch ass finger, not that he was mad about it or anything. Jackson Wang from China had a couple rumors around him, but he was quick to deny those, either it was a cover up or he was a straight male uncomfortable with his masculinity, either way, probably not the one. The Halos roster was much more unfamiliar to Jisung, so he couldn’t quite say for sure if anyone was even a little gay for sure.

Jisung blushes when he thinks to Minho, even before Minho had told him he _knew_ that Minho had to be at least a little gay, the amount of buzz surrounding his sexuality was like that of Harry Styles, but he never addressed it. Now that he knew for sure, it makes so much sense. He tries to tell himself that’s he’s not being selfish and trying to save Minho for himself, but that Minho simply isn’t on the bus, which is still true, though the intentions are unclear.

Minho is off the list.

Finally Felix lands on the boy sitting right behind him, Seo Changbin. Now, Seo Changbin was a very private guy, not one to talk about who he’s fucking all the time, but Jisung just _knows_ his gaydar goes off with Changbin.

So maybe he was taking a chance with this one, but he could be making a solid friendship with Felix, and this could seal the deal.

He’s speaking up before he even realizes it, “Hey Changbin, you mind if Felix sits with you, I uh,” he finds himself needing to come up with a lie on the spot (probably not a good idea), he watches Felix’s eyes widen in realization of what Jisung was doing, “I promised a friend that I would sit with him on the bus, but there’s no where else for Felix to sit.”

Changbin takes out his ear buds, mouth almost open in surprise at the request, “Oh, uh, sure, of course.”

Felix gets up hesitantly, absolutely wanting to kill Jisung. He walks to the seat next to Changbin sitting down slowly, “Uh, I’m Felix.”

Changbin gives a friendly smile, something not seen everyday, “Oh, I’m Changbin,” he pauses almost shocked that he’s able to communicate with the boy, “You’re really good at speaking Korean.”

Jisung decides he should turn back around when he sees the deep red blush this elicits from Felix.

Jisung now is left with the sinking feeling of not only being alone again, but realizing how much of an ass he would look like if he didn’t have a friend come and sit with him like he said.

Jisung sees that pretty much everyone was already seated, he debated texting Seungmin, but he wouldn’t be surprised if he was already halfway though giving Hyunjin a sneaky handy.

Okay maybe he was being dramatic, but he absolutely cannot stand Hyunjin, the boy that his best friend just happened to fall so deeply in love with within the first 5 minutes of meeting him.

Soon, it’s like an answer comes waltzing straight through the door.

Jisung watches the Doosan Bears manager get up to scold Minho for being so late, he can hear a faint, ‘be early next time or you don’t play’.

This seems to be the only thing that was holding up the bus, because as soon as the door closes the bus driver begins to shift out of park and start driving. Minho obviously is forced to make a quick decision about where he should sit, and all Jisung can do it hope he choses the empty seat next to him (not that he wants him to sit next to him or anything, it’s simply because he wants his lie to be believable).

Jisung weighs his odds, he’s the closet empty seat to the front, so he’s got a pretty good chance he’ll fall into the nearest free seat.

Minho stumbles down the aisle of the moving bus until he spots Jisung’s hopeful eyes, the squirrelly boys heart pounds as he sees the older’s face form a smile, he looked genuinely happy, something that Jisung was sure could kill him.

As soon as he’s in the seat and buckling up, Jisung can hear the humor in his voice, “So we meet again, Han.”

Jisung cringes at the name, wishing he could be referred to as something more friendly than his baseball name, something more comfortable, “Oh god, don’t call me that.”

Minho laughs prettily (though everything he does is pretty in Jisung’s eyes, a certain grace), he probably understands him more than most, “As long as you don’t call me Lee Know, you got a deal baby.”

He finally looks up from getting situated, he has a sly smile gracing his face, looking for the younger’s reaction. Jisung can’t even help the blush that graces his face, whether the name was meant that way.

All signs showed that Minho was a classic flirt never backing down and always had a quick line prepared.

Jisung would be damned if the conversation ended there, but he wasn’t sure what to say. He decided to go with something simple, nothing too weird or lengthy, everyday conversation, “It’s a good thing you say next to me, I thought I was going to be sitting alone.”

Minho was digging in his backpack for something, though it was unclear what. The older looks up from his bag, obviously he always had to look at the younger while he was talking, “You don’t like sitting alone?”

His voice carried a surprised tone, which is weird because most would relate to the dismay of sitting alone. Jisung draws together his eyebrows together in confusion, “I mean, yeah, not something I exactly enjoy.”

Minho seems to stop looking for whatever he was searching for, opting for leaning back in his chair. He looks at the squirrelly boy, smiling softly, “I don’t know, there’s something nice about sitting alone sometimes.”

He glances behind Jisung out the window at the passing city, “It’s kinda calming, maybe I’m just an introvert.” He shrugs his shoulders probably dismissing his opinion.

Jisung breaks into a small grin, “That’s a cool way to think about it.”

Minho laughs, looking at the younger amusedly, “Maybe it’s because I’m cool.”

Jisung laughs brightly, at the boy sitting next to him, “You’re right.”

Minho gazes at the younger’s awed face, searching it silently. Suddenly he playfully shoves Jisung’s face, “Don’t look at me like that, Casanova.”

He takes out a package from his backpack, “Gum?”

Jisung can only blush, there was no way he could be a sap too.

—

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi hi 
> 
> hope you enjoyed :)
> 
> I tried to make up for the wait but let me know what you think.
> 
> Feedback is always appreciated:)


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi :)
> 
> sorry to interrupt, but I quickly want to mention that I almost always update every week on Monday nights, so if you want to check here then, you won’t miss out :)
> 
> okay enjoy !

If Jisung was sure there was something that could calm him down, it was his best friend, but tonight, it seemed it just wasn't working.

Now he knows it seems that he's probably always in a constant state of panic, but you have to know he's absolutely shitting bricks tonight.

Tonight he was playing his first game in Spring training.

"Hey, nothing bad can really happen, it won't be the end of the world."

Seungmin was trying his hardest to calm his friend down, but it wasn't quite as easy as usual.

Jisung knew that several people had suggested that it was anxiety, but he refused to believe it, writing it off as his nature to always be nervous about something.

Seungmin had given up trying to get him to see a doctor about it, maybe try to get some medication that could help, but instead insisted on his friend finding something that would calm him down when he wasn't there.

Jisung takes a deep shaky breath in and out, he almost feels embarrassed that his career was based around baseball, and he was struggling to get himself on the field, "Once I start playing I think I will be fine," he swallows the lump in his throat, "I think."

Seungmin rubs Jisung's back from his seat next to him on the locker room bench. He looks like he may say something but soon they feel a presence in front of them, it was Hyunjin.

Jisung knew what this meant, knew that Hyunjin would want to take Seungmin for a little "pre-game motivation". It had started a few nights ago, Seungmin never being able to say no, and frankly not wanting to. Jisung had tried to tell him it wasn't good, that Hyunjin was using him, but Seungmin was nothing less than stubborn, refusing to listen to him on the claim that it was a no strings attached relationship, friends with benefits if you will.

Jisung knew his friend well enough to know that that wouldn't last for long.

Of course, was only a bit of harmless kissing, something that wasn't too risqué, less chance of getting caught, but Jisung didn't even want to know what they could do when they were alone.

Frankly, Jisung was tired of Hyunjin, and he didn't trust him even when his friends feelings weren't involved.

Seungmin looked up sweetly to the boy while Jisung could only look at him tiredly, he wouldn't use energy to play nice anymore.

Hyunjin studies Seungmin's face for a little bit smirking cockily. He doesn't use words, he only gestures to the exit of the locker room with his head. Seungmin's growing smile drops as he realizes Jisung still sitting next to him, he turns to his friend, seeming to prepare to ask.

Jisung has an obvious look of distaste on his face, he raises his eyebrows, seeming to not be able to do anything, "Just go, I'll be fine."

Seungmin starts, "Are you sure ? I can just-", Jisung cuts him off, "Just go, Seungmin."

The boy smiles softly, probably trying to believe his friends words, because it really wasn't fine, but he wanted to believe it was, "Thank you."

Seungmin gets up heading to the door, leaving Hyunjin behind, not wanting to leave at the same time of course.

Hyunjin lingers in front of Jisung, despite the clear un-want, "Hey, Jisung."

Jisung is almost surprised to have the boy speak to him, his response feels entirely uninterested, "What do you want, Hyunjin?"

Hyunjin scoffs at the disrespect in his tone, looking away before he speaks, "Look we're gonna see each other a lot regardless of whether we hate eachother or not," Jisung could only blink up at the man, not impressed by his dramatics, "so let's just avoid each other as much as possible and pretend like nothings wrong in front of the others."

Jisung wasn't going to complain, as long he didn't have to interact with such a dull and angry man, he was fine, "Okay."

Hyunjin looks surprised, like he was expecting more, a push back, "Okay ?"

Jisung nods, "Yeah, as long as I don't have to talk to you."

Hyunjin raises his eyebrows, he almost looks hurt, probably a bruised ego, "Well then...okay."

Jisung forces a tight lipped smile, nodding again, wanting to conversation to end, "Okay."

Hyunjin finally takes the hint, leaving the awkward conversation to make his way to wherever him and Seungmin hide out.

Jisung lets out a breath, though he's not sure when he started holding it. He rubs his eyes frustratedly, resting his elbows on his knees.

He figured being alone could help him calm down, though he was terribly wrong, maybe Hyunjin distracted him for a bit, but now he was just left with his thoughts.

Jisung spots Minho making his way over to the spot next to him on the bench. His friendly smile made Jisung's heart surge with warmth, loving the way he seemed excited to see him.

When he finally sits down he nudges the younger with his shoulder playfully, "What's got you down, Casanova?"

Jisung blushes at the name, something Minho had been reusing since the day spent on the bus together. 

The squirrelly boy had gotten quite used to telling Minho what was wrong as he asked quite often, "Seungmin's off with Hyunjin again."

Minho lets out an 'ah' nodding in understanding, knowing about the whole set up from Jisung's complaining and Hyunjin's unnecessary explaining.

Jisung laughs sarcastically, "But wait there's more."

Minho raises his eyebrows, looking at the younger expectantly for the drama, "Oh really? Do tell."

Jisung smiles, knowing the humor in it, already certain Minho will get a kick out of this, "Hyunjin just told me that he think we should, and I quote," the squirrelly boy puts air quotes up, emphasizing Hyunjin's dramatic qualities, "avoid each other as much as possible and pretend that nothing is wrong around others."

Minho laughs loudly, pretty smile making Jisung loose his train of thought, "That's _hilarious_. Oh _god_ he's so childish."

When Minho is done laughing he playfully nudges the younger's shoulder with his, "And what did you say?"

Jisung giggles, resting his forehead on the older's shoulder as he laughs at the stupidity, "I said okay."

Minho laughs, eyes brightly, pushing the boy lightly with his mouth agape, "All you said was okay?"

Jisung giggles some more, shaking his head, "Looking back on it, maybe I should have said more," he pauses looking at the older's amused expression, "but would it really have been worth it?"

Minho shakes his head, "I can't believe you sometimes."

Jisung is captured by his gaze as soon it lands on his. There was some sort of haze in the air, joy and tension something buzzing around them. Minho searches the younger's face again, finally realizing how close they are.

Minho lets out a quiet breath, "There's something beautifully messy about you."

Jisung feels his breath catch in his throat, no one could deny the feeling of being called beautiful, "Really ? I would say more messy than beautiful."

Minho smiles lazily, "No, you're definitely beautiful," he gazes at the younger's lips, "pretty really."

Jisung tries to ignore his heart beating out of his chest, he hasn't been spoken to like that in months surely.

Minho pulls back smirking slyly, but replaces the proximity with a hand on the younger's knee squeezing playfully, "But you're definitely still a mess."

It was supposed to be a platonic thing, a little gesture to emphasize his teasing, but Jisung just _knew _that there had to be something more there. All signs pointed to it. Jisung was never one to assume that any gay man automatically liked him, but the blatant flirting had Jisung convinced that at least _a spark_ was there.

Jisung blushes belatedly, shoving his face in his hands embarrassedly like a shy kid.

Minho puts his arm around the boy, resting his head on his, smiling amusedly as he rocks him back and forth, something that could be passed as friendly.

Jisung forgets that he was nervous about the game, immersed in Minho.

But just to be safe, Minho turns his head to whisper in Jisung's ear.

"You're going to do great tonight by the way, I'm sure of it."

—

This was it, the bright lights, the heat still searing into the night, Jisung was playing.

It was halfway through the 5th inning, and the Los Angeles Angels were playing defense.

Neither teams had made a run yet.

Jisung didn't know if he felt good that the score was 0-0, it meant he had been doing his job right, the team couldn't make a run on their defense. But that also meant their defense was just as good, and any slips up led to a lead that could win them the game.

There was a player already on first, waiting for the moment to run to second.

Jisun was nervously adjust his hat as the next batter was getting ready. He glances over at Minho, the shortstop, standing in between third and second base. He's chewing gum, looking _so hot_, without even trying, his hair didn't need to be done for him to look princely. Even on the field he held some sort of grace, a lightness on his feet, a sparkle in his smile.

Minho turns his head to find Jisung looking at him, one foot on the base, hand and glove behind his back. The older couldn't help but think he looked tiny, back in the little leagues, too distracted by a butterfly to notice what was happening in the game.

Jisung can't help but think he loves the way Minho looks at him, like he's longing to be next to him, always looking like he's excited to see him.

Jisung smiles cutely, trying to get a laugh out of the older.

He can tell Minho tries to act professional, stifling his laugh in his hand. When he looks back up he smiles back at him, smirking really.

Jisung shifts his feet and turns the other way to blush hopelessly when the older winks at him.

Jisung can only look back at the man and shake his head as to say a playful, 'I hate you'.

Jisung finally notices that the batter is ready, in position and everything.

Jisung stands up in anticipation, watching closely to make sure he didn't miss anything.

The first pitch was a ball, Kevin straight of up for the second pitch. The second pitch was an out going straight to center field where Hyunjin catches it easily.

Two outs left.

The third pitch was a 'nice fast ball served by Kevin Moon' as the announcer said, leaving the other team with one out and one strike.

Jisung hoped that the batter wouldn't hit it again, that he would just get out, making it easier on himself, relieving a bit of pressure.

Before he knows it, the batter hits a bunt that bounces past Kevin and in between second and third base, right to Minho.

The ball was moving towards Jisung, but the older didn't wan't him to leave the base. The player previously on first was quickly approaching second looking like he was going to slide for it when Minho runs up to him, _tossing_ the ball to Jisung, automatically getting the sliding man out. The batter was still running to first and in the heat of the moment, Jisung had to get the man out. He threw it straight to Seungmin on first base, his friend reaches out, left foot still on first, catching it before the batter is even close.

And they were both out, just like that.

The crowd was going crazy, I mean a double play like that. Sure it wasn't like they gained a run, but they _did _that shit.

That was three outs, the end of the inning, and time for the teams to switch out.

Jisung began to walk to the dugout, smile on his face, not seeing Minho approaching fast.

He almost tackles him, wrapping his arms around Jisung's shoulders in lethal a back hug.

Jisung places a hand on the older's arm as he walks with him, smiling and giggling with the boy.

Jisung feels his breath on his ear before he speaks.

"You're so god damn amazing, Jisungie."

Jisung was still shaking long after he got off the field.

—

If there was anything more attractive than just Minho, it was a concentrating Minho.

He was currently drawing on a restaurant napkin, a talent Jisung was completely unaware he had.

They had just sat down for dinner, a celebratory dinner for the win tonight. Chan had drove them because for the Angels team, it wasn't that big of a deal, but this game was the first game they won where a significant number of the players were from Korean teams.

Of _course _they were going to celebrate.

And of _course_ they requested Korean Barbeque.

Minho walked close behind him the whole time, clearly wanting a seat next to him. Seungmin sat on Jisung's other side with Hyunjin next to him, and Changbin sat across from them, Felix (who tagged along) with him. Woojin and Chan however, were off in their own little world grilling the meat.

Jisung had mentioned in a conversation with Changbin and Minho (who both hit it off very quickly) that Changbin was a mix between a pig and a bunny and Minho found that very funny. Funny enough to begin to draw a pig bunny mutant on his napkin.

He had a serious look on his face trying to make the pigunny absolutely _perfect_.

Jisung knew he probably looked incredibly creepy looking at Minho the whole time he was drawing, but he couldn't his eyes off the way his eyes squinted and his lips curled in concentration.

Minho must have felt his gaze as he turns his head away from his drawing to Jisung, smiling at the boy's obvious pining.

"See something you like, Casanova?"

Jisung blushes and turns his head, "Shut up."

Minho hums, proping himself up by placing his chin on his hand to look at the younger smugly, "Genuine question."

Jisung scoffs, at the direct question, knowing the meaning behind it, "I can't tell you all my secrets."

Minho chuckles at the younger boy avoiding his question, changing the subject, "It's done."

Jisung gasps excitedly, "Let me see!"

Minho giggles at the childish antics, handing him the napkin.

Jisung laughs at the mutant animal he's holding, turning to the older proudly, "Only you could make such an ugly imagination cute."

Minho laughs and shoves the younger's face playfully, directing his attention to the rest of the group. Yoo Jeongyeon, the press manager that came with them to tag along on the Korean Barbeque, was excluding herself to the bathroom.

Suddenly, when she was out of hearing range, Hyunjin was speaking up, "Jesus look at that ass."

Jisung was confused at first, but soon he realized that he was most definitely talking about Jeongyeon's ass.

Jisung couldn't help but feel disgusted, maybe it was because he was gay or maybe it was the fact that he had simple respect for women.

Hyunjin was at the opposite end of the table, but Jisung could hear him loud and clear, "She most definitely would be in my top ten dream fucks."

Jisung had lost his appetite, discreetly turning to Minho on his left, "Jesus Christ, is this how heteros talk to eachother."

Minho chuckles at the statement, not realizing Jisung was not quite joking.

Jisung is almost surprised to hear Changbin contribute, "Yeah i'd definitely tap that." Felix squirms next to him.

Minho clears his throat, preparing to do something, but Jisung can see the humorous look in his eye, "Yeah me too, man."

Jisung's eyes widen, he hits the older's leg under the table, whispering, almost angrily, to him, "What the hell Minho? You don't actually think that, do you?"

Minho has a shit eating grin on his face, "Why, you jealous?"

Jisung rolls his eyes, in normal circumstances, his flirting would have him crooning, but he could believe what he was hearing.

Minho sees the look on his face, "Look I have to spew as much toxic masculinity as possible for people to actually believe I'm straight."

Jisung scoffs, unimpressed, "Yeah, well you don't have to be an asshole to be straight, Minho. Objectifying women isn't cute, it's not funny, and it's not manly, it's just plain gross, so find some other way to mask your gayness."

Jisung turns straight in his chair, preferring to not look at the older. Minho reaches out and places a hand on the younger's thigh comfortingly, "Hey, look at me," Jisung doesn't budge, "Jisungie, look at me."

Jisung takes a deep breath before turning his head to the older, he was turned completely in his chair to face the younger, worried look on his face, "Look you're right, I'm sorry, I guess I'm so used to locker room talk that I don't understand the severity of it, and you're right it's gross and I will never say something like that again. Now don't go cold on me, Casanova."

Jisung can't stay mad at him, he knows that he's apologetic and he knows he definitely didn't mean it. He shakes his head though there's a glint of humor in the way he tries to mask his smile, "You play too much."

Minho chuckles, glad to not have an angry Han Jisung on his hands, "I know, I know, I'm going to be better about that. I can be serious."

Jisung feigns shock, "Oh really? Then you're going to have to prove that-"

Jisung notices Seungmin on his right, silently moving around his food, not eating, only looking at his plate with disdain.

Jisung excuses himself from the conversation to turn to his friend, "Hey Minnie, what's wrong?" He rubs his back soothingly, he could already assume what was wrong, but he didn't want to start up anything.

Seungmin takes in a shaky breath, Jisung can see the tears pooling in his eyes, ready to fall any moment.

Jisung stops him before he even starts, not wanting him to cry in front of every one else. There wasn't anything wrong with that, but Jisung _knew_ Seungmin hated crying in front of others, and it looked like as soon as he started talking he would break.

Jisung leans his head on his friends should, rubbing his back faster, trying to calm him down, "Hey, hey, you can tell me later, don't worry about it."

Seungmin looked up at the boy with glassy eyes, he looked touched that his friend understood him so well.

"Thank you, Sungie."

—

"Okay, tell me what's going on."

As soon as they arrived in their hotel room together, Jisung needed answers.

Seungmin was already sobbing, letting out everything that had been building up since dinner.

Jisung led the crying boy to the bed where he sat him down and held him until he was ready to talk.

About 10 minutes later he was calm, sniffling on Jisung's shoulder, "Do you think he's using me?"

Jisung almost doesn't know what to say, how do you respond to that? Seungmin doesn't let him, "I realized it when he started talking about Jeongyeon, that he doesn't actually like me, that he doesn't _care_, that he's using me."

Seungmin sits up, wiping his eye roughly, obviously in the anger stage now.

Jisung wants to help but he doesn't know to what extent the relationship has gotten to, "Have you guys, you know, gone all the way?"

Seungmin's puffy eyes widen considerably, "No! No, god no."

Jisung looks relieved, "Well then you either need to have a serious talk with him, or you need to cut him off, either way, you can't go on like this, friends with benefits will not work for you, I know you'll just get attached."

Seungmin nods, knowing he's right, suddenly he pouts, "But he's so pretty."

Jisung laughs brightly, bringing his best friend in for a big hug, "I know, Minnie, it's always the pretty boys."

—

It was about 10:30, Jisung couldn't sleep.

After Seungmin fell asleep, not even 10 minutes after they were done talking, Jisung found that he couldn't fall asleep as easily as his friend.

Jisung wasn't left with a lot of options and he didn't want to wake the younger up. So, as any insane man would do, he went for a walk.

He of course wouldn't leave the hotel, but he thought walking around would suffice.

The halls were empty, there was minimal light, but the elevators were still slow like always and you could still hear the trickle of the water in the koi pond. After staying here for an extended amount of time, Jisung knew his way around quite well, there was a pool on the 3rd floor, a nice breakfast place near the reception, and if you asked nicely, the man at the convenience store counter would give you food to feed the koi fish.

Unfortunately, the store was closed for the night, so Jisung would have to visit with the fish empty handed, though he surely could make up for it later.

Jisung walked past the grand piano, pressing a few random keys.

"You know how to play?"

Jisung jumps, turning towards the voice.

It was Minho, surprise surprise.

Jisung clutches his chest, "Jesus Christ, Minho, you scared the shit out of me."

Minho slowly makes his way over, chuckling, "I'm terribly sorry, but I couldn't bare to watch you from afar any longer."

Jisung laughs and shakes his head, "You know, it's starting to seem like you're following me at this point."

Minho smiles devilishly, features lit up coldly by the shiny gray moonlight coming in from the giant windows of the hotel, "I don't see you complaining."

Jisung laughs and gasps playfully, pushing the older's shoulder, "What a creep!"

Minho places a finger over the younger's mouth to shush him as the sound of his voice echoes throughout the place, "Wouldn't want to wake up the whole hotel, now would we."

Jisung giggles, light blush adorning his cheeks, "You're right, that would ruin this alone time we're having right now."

Minho smiles, admiring the younger's face a bit longer than usual. Jisung smiles remembering the older's line from earlier today, "See something you like?"

Minho raises his eyebrows, impressed by the witty comment. He hums in agreement, "Hm, yeah I do."

Jisung blushes looking down at his feet while he leans on the piano shyly, "Not one to shy away from directness are you?"

Minho shrugs his shoulders with a certain nonchalant air to it, "Only when I need to be," he pauses, smiling knowingly, "maybe to counterbalance someone's utter disregard to letting someone know what they're thinking."

Minho pushes the younger's shoulder as to imply that he was most _definitely _ talking about him.

Jisung isn't entirely sure what to say, heavy blush spread across his cheeks, smiling embarrassedly.

Minho saves him, "So, you never answered my question, you know how to play?"

Jisung shrugs trying to act like it wasn't that big of a deal while Minho walks over to lean next to him on the piano, "Maybe a little."

Minho smiles, looking impressed, "Ah a man of many talents."

Jisung pretends to be above it, sticking his nose in the air, "What can I say?"

The two boys laugh, in their own little world, ignoring everything else and pretending like in the morning everything won't change.

"So I'm sure you didn't come down here at 10:30 to play piano."

Jisung scratches the back of his neck, "I, uh, I couldn't really sleep."

Minho nods understandingly, "Ah, me too."

Suddenly Minho stands up from the piano, turning around to face the younger as he talks, "But you're just in luck, I happen to be very good at consoling insomniacs."

Jisung giggles as he walks towards the older, "Are you sure? I could be an especially hard case."

Minho raises his arms to the side to quickly let them fall to his side, "Good thing I'm an expert in cute insomniacs named Han Jisung."

Jisung smiles an infatuated dazed smile, looking into the bright eyes of the older and _knowing_, "I guess I'm in luck then."

—

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi :)
> 
> So I want to apologize to those who may be more unfamiliar with baseball, there was a lot of baseball terminology in this chapter, god knows I’m no baseball expert, but it wasn’t too terribly important. Just know that it was really cool and impressive and that they did awesome :)
> 
> n e ways, thanks for reading !
> 
> feedback is always appreciated :)


	5. Chapter 5

Jisung wasn't sure when his admiration for Minho turned into the likes of a crush, but it definitely had.

Everyday he was looking for the older, asking where he was, what he was doing, and every time he found him, the man was there to greet him fondly and tease him profusely.

He knew it was terribly unprofessional, but Minho has such charisma and charm, something just draws him to the older, like a moth to a flame.

It was a good week into Spring Training, and Jisung was conflicted.

He couldn't think properly with all the things weighing down his mind. He didn't know what Minho was thinking, he didn't know what he wanted, and he didn't even want to know what would happen if they actually got together and the team found out.

But of course that was if Minho was even interested, though probably not, he's surely not the type to falling for people out of the blue.

This revelation of his feelings however was very pressing news, it was almost as if it was going to burst out of him any second.

He had skipped out on lunch with the group today to take a shower early, as he was feeling particularly sweaty, leaving him in his hotel room completely alone with his thoughts.

Something Jisung found to be _very _bad.

Jisung really _really_ wanted to tell Seungmin, he was the first person he wanted to tell, but of course he went to lunch, which just happened to be very inconvenient for him.

The next thing he knew, he was rushing down the hallway to Woojin's room, hair still wet.

The only thing he was sure about was that he absolutely _had _to tell _someone_.

Jisung knocks probably unnecessarily loud, the faster it was out of his system the better he would feel. He needed Woojin to listen to him, needed him to say that it was okay, that he wasn't crazy.

At times like these he wishes he was one of those people that just kept everything to themselves, the ones who felt more secure knowing information stayed with them, Jisung would be _thriving_ right now. Except he was the exact opposite, he gained somewhat of a reputation for this and was always known for being very bad at keeping secrets.

The door swings open, revealing a frustrated Changbin instead.

Jisung tried to look around the older's short figure with wide eyes, trying to spot his manager in the room, "Is Woojin here?"

Changbin looks terribly confused, still holding the door, "Uh no, he went to lunch with some of the other managers be-."

"I think I have a crush on Minho!"

Changbin raises his eye brows in pure shock painting his face, "You, _what_?"

Jisung rushes past the older into the hotel room, clutching his hair from anxiety, "Oh my god I can't believe I just told you that, I was going to tell Woojin and then you were here and he wasn't here and I couldn't _not_ tell someone so my brain made an epic word barf and it just came out," Jisung stops in his tracks to turn around and look at the older who was closing the door tentatively, "I am so sorry."

Changbin approaches the boy slowly, momentarily stunned by Jisung's run-on sentence. He gets him back on topic, "You have a crush on _Lee Minho_?"

Jisung is quick to correct him, pointing at him and beginning to pace, "I _think_ I have a crush on him."

Changbin watches the boy walking back and forth incredulously, "You _think_ or you _know_?"

Jisung pulls at his hair frustratedly before he plops him self on the bed, sighing loudly. He looks away from the ceiling towards the older, pouty look on his face.

His voice grows very quiet, "I know."

Changbin rubs his face tiredly before he calmly walks over to sit next to the worried boy, "Why did you fall for someone on the _one team _who's supposed to be our rival, out of everyone?"

Jisung's lips turn up sheepishly, shrugging his shoulders a bit, "Romeo and Juliet?"

Changbin scoffs hitting the younger's shoulder, "Yah, you can't have a crush on him, you can sleep with him, sure, but you can't have romantic ties to someone on our _rival team_."

Jisung blushes at the older's crude statement.

Changbin sees the blush on his face, face morphing into shock, misreading the situation, "Wait, you've already fucked him?"

Jisung sits straight up, eyes wide, "No! No, no, nothing like that." He trails off at the end, getting quieter and he stares at his hands in his lap.

Changbin looks relieved, "Thank god, with your face that red I thought you had done it multiple times."

Jisung shoves the older playfully, face flushing again. He giggles suddenly, "At least not yet."

Changbin gasps at the statement, shocked by his boldness, "No sir, Han Jisung!"

Jisung raises his hands in defense, eyebrows raises in innocence, eyes wide, "You said I could fuck him!"

Changbin strikes back just as quick, "Yes, but multiple fucks lead to _multiple feelings_, more than just sex. Further proving my point that you can't have a crush on him!"

Jisung covers his face in frustration, falling back on the bed, "I can't help it!" He uncovers his face staring at the ceiling thinking about a certain boy, "He's so charming and handsome, and god damnit he makes my heart flutter, so just forgetting about him is not as simple as you make it seem."

"Look, kid, imagine what happens when we get back to Korea, you'll be playing against him more often than not, how willing will you be to strike out your _boyfriend_."

Jisung only flushes staring down at his crossed feet. He has a point, a very valid one, but he almost feels like he needs Changbin's blessing, like he needs to convince him.

"Haven't you been so mesmerized by someone that no matter how hard you try you can't get them off your mind?"

Jisung expects him to say no, Changbin isn't exactly the lovey dovey type, but to Jisung, it was worth a shot.

Changbin sighs, suddenly softer, "I mean yeah."

Jisung sits straight up, jumping off the bed to stand in front of the older, "You have?"

Changbin opens and closes his mouth, "I'm just saying I know what it's like."

Jisung shakes his head, "No, no, you can't just say that and not tell me who this," Jisung pauses considering his words momentarily, "this _person_ is."

The last thing Jisung wanted to do was assume it was a girl and make Changbin think he had to act like it was a girl, something that had happened to the squirrelly boy multiple times.

Changbin shakes his head getting up to start unpacking his suitcase like he had been doing before Jisung barged in. They had recently switched out roommates to where Seungmin and Jisung were together and Woojin and Changbin were together, much to Jisung's dismay.

"It's irrelevant because I actually know how to separate work and my love life."

Jisung isn't buying it, "Bull-shit, tell me about this lovely person who occupies Seo Changbin's brain."

The older rolls his eyes turning around to look at the boy, sighing, "If I tell you will you go back to your room and eat some lunch before we go to the game?"

Jisung nods enthusiastically, willing to do anything to hear about this guy, er, person (Jisung was absolutely _positive_ his gaydar was going off).

Changbin waits for Jisung to get comfortable as he flops on the bed, belly down, propping his head on his hand like a little kid listening to his grandparent tell a story.

Changbin sighs, "You know Felix?"

Jisung instead of yelling out a yes of affirmation, yells out a gleeful yes of accomplishment, two very different things. Changbin's face contorts into one of confusion, Jisung chuckles nervously, "Sorry, I was just really excited about the fact that was right about you liking guys," He pauses, "which I now realize is very creepy, I am so sorry."

Changbin nods, confusion still written on his face, "Right.. anyways, we've been hanging out a lot and flirting a bit, but," he pauses throwing a shirt into a drawer, "I would never let my career and personal life mix like that."

Jisung pouts, secretly wanting to be a wing man for his friend, "But he's not even a baseball player!"

Changbin walks over the younger, beginning to pull up the boy, to force him towards the door, despite the younger's resistance, "I remember you saying you were going to leave after I told you."

Jisung lets out a medley of 'no's and 'why's as he tries to wrangle his way out of the dark boys grip.

He tosses Jisung out the door, the squirrelly boy turning around as fast as he could, "But think about it, it's not as bad-"

Changbin starts to close the door, Jisung scrambling to keep it open, "Wait, wait, wait!"

Changbin opens the door slightly, unimpressed look on his face, "Okay, I'll drop it," Changbin gestures for him to continue, "I just wanted to say thank you for listening to me today, you didn't have to."

The older's expression softens, smiling almost, "It was no problem, Jisung-ah."

Jisung forms a small smile, unsure of what to say next, so he opts for beginning to turn towards his room.

"Hey, Han Jisung!"

Jisung turns, surprised that Changbin wanted to say something, he hums in response.

"You know you can tell me things right? I know you wanted to tell Woojin, but, I'm always here if you want to talk."

This was the smallest Jisung had ever seen Changbin, he might be shorter, but his personality carried out around him, making him seem always seem taller than he was. But here he was offering something, a kind of friendship maybe, and he looked small and vulnerable, all his walls down. Maybe Jisung felt he could finally understand Changbin, he's just a big baby with a tough exterior.

Jisung smiles gently, touched, "I'll keep that in mind, hyung, thank you, really."

—

"Jesus Christ, Jeongin is insane."

Felix laughs a deep chuckle, "You can say that again."

Jisung lets out another sound of surprise watching Jeongin throw another fast ball, surely competing with those of the hall of fame.

He had been pitching great all night, coach almost not wanting to take him out, he was astounding, incredible really.

Jisung and Felix were in the dug out, leaning on the railing, watching the game with the rest of the team. Another trainer was being ball boy currently, and Jisung wasn't playing today, so they used this time to catch up.

Jisung had been wanting to bring up Changbin for almost the whole game, but he was unsure how to, and frankly he knew it would just sound awkward, "So, uh, how are things with Changbin?"

Yeah, it was still awkward.

Felix catches this feeling, slightly embarrassed as his chin goes to rest on his crossed arms placed on the railing, "Uh, good."

Jisung groans, not wanted to beat around the bush anymore, "C'mon kid give me something to work with."

Felix laughs, looking down the row to see if anyone nearby might speak Korean, if they understood even a bit of what they said their careers could be over, "Well, uhm, I don't know it's kind of weird for me."

Jisung furrows his brows, turning away from the game to look at the Australian, "In what way?"

Felix readjusts, resting his head on his hand to look at the sky in thought, "I don't know, I've flirted with a lot of sporty guys before, it's in my career, but none of them have actually flirted back."

Jisung nods in understanding, letting him continue, "In all honesty I was skeptical about Changbin when you first introduced us, it seemed very, bro-ish, like he was just a straight guy playing around, but now subtle things happen and I just feel like it has to be more."

Jisung giggles, finding the similarity between their situations humorous. He looks back onto the field, longingly looking at Minho, chewing his gum, adjusting his hat. Minho notices the boy looking at him, maybe Felix is still talking, but surely with Minho looking at him like he was the only boy in the world, he just had to be.

Minho raises his eyebrows playfully, tilting his head as to say, 'See something you like?"

Jisung can almost hear him saying it, anticipating being able to talk to him again. The younger shakes his head playfully, while Minho raises his eyebrows, almost to say a sarcastic 'Sure you don't.'

"And I guess with Chan I was so convinced we would have this life together and we'd go back to Australia when we got older, and now to suddenly hop to another guy it seems sudden, doesn't it?"

Jisung turns his head with an audible huh sound of surprise, snapping out of his Minho trance. He hadn't been following anything the younger had been saying but he figured agreeing would be the best option, "Uh, yeah, right."

Felix's eyes widen slightly, "Oh, yeah, you're right, maybe I should back off a little."

Jisung panics slightly, "Wait, wait, well," he pauses trying to piece together some keywords he semi-heard to take back his previous statement, "What I meant was, it may seem too soon for you, but you and Chan were never actually together, he's unaware of this relationship that had supposedly been sparked, so if you're going to move on it's for you, and Chan will be happy for you."

Felix seems to think this over, studying his words, "So you think I should go for it with Changbin?"

Jisung hesitates, he knows Changbin isn't too keen on the whole idea, but god knows he won't let this relationship just die before his eyes, "Well, uh, yeah," Jisung scratches his chin thoughtfully, "I think he will be really stubborn, but I think you just have to keep going, because it will be worth it."

Felix nods thinking, smiling genuinely at his friend, " Thanks, Jisung, god what would I do without you?"

Jisung laughs slightly pushing the boy with his shoulder, "Your job would be a lot more boring."

Felix laughs, face suddenly feigning seriousness, "Okay, now your turn, how are things with Minho?"

Jisung opens and closes his mouth, he wasn't sure what to say. He didn't want to really say anything that could be compromising to him later, considering that nothing had actually happened, he didn't want to be stuck later.

Thankfully, the end of the inning came, giving Jisung a valid reason to not answer. He directs the boys attention to the miffed pitcher entering the dugout, "Look, Jeongin is coming in."

The young boy walked past his friends, straight to the bench where his water bottle was. Jisung plops down next to him, Felix following, patting the youngest on the back, "Jeongin you did great out there."

Jeongin can only spitefully look toward the field, taking a long swig from his water bottle, "Coach is going to keep me out there for fucking ever, I swear to god if he puts me out there for the rest of the game."

Jisung wants to laugh like Felix, though it doesn't quite seem like a joke, but he can't help that it rubs him the wrong way. Yeah, it's great that his friend was getting plenty of play time, and yes he does deserve a break, but Jisung couldn't ever imagine _complaining_ about about something like that. He wishes that coach liked him enough to let him play almost every game, not even play almost the whole time.

Jisung didn't think he was necessarily a bad player, but a lot of things had been weighing him down lately.

He was already struggling with the fact that Jeongin was so much younger than him, yet so much _better_. Jisung didn't consider himself a jealous person, but no matter how close you are to someone, how much respect you have, you will always have that bit of spite for someone who's better than you, it's human nature.

Jisung almost feels angry at himself for feeling this way, hating that he couldn't just be happy for him.

He just wished Jeongin didn't take what he had for granted.

Jisung wasn't really in the mood anymore, he never returned to the railing to watch the rest of the game. He hated that he might be ruining the mood, he was stuck in a cycle of hate for himself and self pity.

Every other thought was something building, something forming a pressure on his head, compressing him into himself. He felt stuck, he wasn't sure if he could leave his seat on the bench until Felix was dragging him out of the dugout.

All he wanted was for his anxiety and jealousy to go away.

And it just wasn't that easy.

—

"I figured you would be here."

Jisung looks up to find him.

He blushes looking back down at the koi pond he was crisscrossed in front of. He had bought food for the fish a couple days earlier incase he wanted to bring some to another one of his night time hotel wanderings.

The boy had skipped out on dinner with the team that night, they had won, so it had to have been a good one, but there was no way he could go with them like this.

Jisung was always the happy one, the one who made the jokes, he wasn't the sad one. Jesus, he can already hear the people asking him if he's okay over and over. The squirrelly boy couldn't bother explaining to people that just because he wasn't in the mood for jokes didn't mean he wasn't okay.

Minho understood him though.

In fact, Minho knew he would find Jisung sat in front of the koi pond at 1 am, looking like a kindergartner sitting on a rug. If that didn't show the boys alarmingly deep understanding of the younger, he wasn't sure what would.

"Glad I didn't disappoint."

Jisung sounded miffed, frustrated maybe, "Sorry that came out meaner than I wanted it to."

Minho stayed silent, simply sitting next to the boy, watching the fish dance around.

Jisung appreciated that Minho gave him space, he knew where the line was, maybe he flirted with it a bit, but he never crossed it, _never_.

After a few minutes Minho lets out a breath, he looks over to Jisung examining his face, noting the pain, the concentration, he was thinking about something.

He lifts a hand up to gently raise the younger's chin, almost giving him the opportunity to take his hand away, "Tell me whats on your mind, Casanova."

Jisung laughs curtly, feeling pathetic, still the name gets to him, "I don't know, it's bull shit," Jisung turns his head out of Minho grip, burying his face in his hands, "it's stupid to even think about, let alone tell you," Jisung grips his hair, taking in a large breath, "God I feel pathetic."

Minho can sense Jisung's panic coming in, "Hey, hey, hey," he places a hand on the younger's thigh, rubbing back and forth trying to calm the boy down, "try to calm down, Jisungie."

Jisung is starting to breathe heavily, shallow and quick, face drawn in pain, fear maybe, "It's so stupid, I can't believe I'm annoying you with this."

Minho shakes his head, reaching out to move the younger's head to his shoulder, holding him, slowly rocking him and rubbing his shoulder, "Listen, you could never annoy me."

Jisung nods against the older's shoulder, trying to breathe normally. Minho runs a hand through the younger's hair, "What ever is bothering you, it's not stupid, if it makes you upset, its perfectly valid."

Jisung can't help the rush of emotions.

Never has anyone ever said something like that to him, _ever_. Maybe it didn't seem like such a big deal, but Minho fucking _got him_, he _understood_. At times it seemed like he knew what he was thinking before he did, and now Minho knew exactly what to say and what to do.

And out of what? The kindness of his own heart? He has no reason to be here, yet here he was, seeking him out, putting his heart on his sleeve for Jisung to feel better.

He felt loved, he felt overwhelmed, and he felt like he really wanted to fucking kiss the shit out of Lee Minho, because god damn he's so kind and perfect.

He can't help but cry.

Minho picks the younger's face out of his neck, cupping his cheeks and rubbing the tears off his face, "Hey, why are you crying?"

He chokes out a sob, almost seeming like he can't breathe, his sobs wrack his body so violently, like he hasn't cried in ages, "You're so perfect and I just wish,"

He stops, silence filled with his cries, he isn't quite sure what he wants to say.

Minho doesn't break his gaze as he holds the younger's face, letting him take his time.

"I just sometimes feel like everyone else is doing so well in life and I'm just doing okay, you know?"

Minho nods, letting the boy take a fortifying breath before he continues, "I wish I wasn't so mediocre all the time, for once I just want to be perfect, like everyone else." Jisung chokes out a sob at the end, squeezing his eyes in an attempt to stop the tears.

Minho at first looks worried, it almost hurt to watch such a beautiful boy have such painful emotions coming out of him. The older's lips curl up into a caring smile, lighting up the dimly lit lobby, "Han Jisung, you are one of the most talented and amazing people I know. You comparing yourself to others doesn't make sense, because you're not the same person. Do you think Jeongin had a choice of whether he was going to play baseball or not? He's been playing nonstop since he was old enough to hold a ball. Hyunjin who has a stick so far up his ass it's amazing how he walks, surely seems perfect, right? We all know thats bullshit, he's got anger issues, commitment issues, and drug problems coming out of his ass. Me? I've been living a lie my whole life, pretending to be straight, pretending to be someone I'm not."

Minho takes a break, Jisung can see the pain in his eyes, he's never seen him like this. The older takes his hands away, "Anyone who seems to be perfect, isn't, because we've all got a story, we've all got things we fucking hate about ourselves and we all pretend that we don't. If you're mediocre Han Jisung, we're all mediocre."

Jisung smiles sadly, still shaking slightly, looking at Minho with admiration in his glassy eyes.

The younger can't think of anything else to do than to just hug him, so that's what he does.

They stay there for a few moments, Jisung's breath slowing, tears drying. Soon they're both breathing in sync, maybe Jisung is relishing in Minho's scent, something so nice to have despite having been on a hot field for hours.

When they pull apart, Minho is quick to place a comforting hand on the younger's knee, soothing him with his thumb.

He speaks up after a few minutes, laughing to himself, "I'm not sure what this is to you but," he finally raises his eyes back up the younger, sporting his notoriously intense gaze, "but you're perfect in my eyes, so perfect, and I can't think of a better word to describe it,"

He directs his focus back at his hands, quieter, a bit flustered, "Flawless maybe."

Jisung can only look at the boy in awe.

Entirely not being able to process anything.

Between his almost-panic-attack, and Minho's confessions, Jisung's mind had started short circuiting.

"Why are you nice to me?"

Minho looks up, almost shocked, mouth opening slightly, looking at Jisung's wide eyes. From where the older sits on the ground, shoulders hunched over, he looks tired, human.

Jisung wasn't sure why he asked him, in reality he would never have had the balls to do that on the field or in the locker room. But somehow sitting on the floor in a dark hotel room next to a god damn koi pond, nothing could seem ridiculous, "I mean our teams fucking hate each other, and yet everyday, you stand up for me," the squirrelly boy laughs, "in your annoyingly unreadable way." They both laugh, Minho waits for him to finish, "I just can't seem to get into your head, and you know I thought I would figure it out like I figured out Changbin, but..." Jisung pauses running a hand through the pond in front of him, "I don't know."

Minho takes a breathe, smiling to himself, "I guess I just don't see the point in hating someone like you."

Jisung furrows him eyebrows, almost frustrated by the simplicity of his answer.

Minho smiles at the younger's puffed cheeks and furrowed brow, looking as intimidating as an angry puppy, "I don't know, you're kind, and you're funny. You're always trying to make new friends, you're admirable," He looks up from his hands placed in his crisscrossed legs, "You're real," he lifts a hand to move hair from Jisung's forehead, resting it on his cheek, "I find that beautiful," he lets out a ghost of a laugh, "You're beautiful."

Jisung blushes deeply, touched, but god knows he would never let an emotional moment go on for too long, "You're going to have to try harder than that if you want to win my heart."

They both giggle like little kids, trying to be quiet in the silent hotel, holding each others stare, silently communicating.

Minho raises his eyebrows heart still airy, "Oh really?"

Jisung giggles and nods his head cutely, "Mhm, I'm not that easy, I have my standards."

Minho's demeanor is still playful even as it shifts to something more seductive, "Then I guess I'll have to do some more convincing."

Jisung smiles devilishly back at the older, daring him, "I guess so."

When he starts to leans in, Jisung is sure his heart stops, his breath hitches in anticipation, all signs that Minho was incredibly experienced in drawing someone in.

Jisung had gone through so many emotions within the last 20 minutes, he couldn't even think about it. His mind could only focus on the nervousness and the butterflies flying around in his stomach, he was inches away from kissing _Lee Minho_. He wasn't sure what it was that made him so impatient, maybe it was the weeks of build up, the tension building, the fact that Minho was the epitome of boyfriend material and had just calmed him down enough to prevent a panic attack (which was apparently a turn on that he didn't know he had) but Jisung could _not _wait for Minho to kiss him, he simply wasn't going to.

He closes the gap before the older can, both sighing into the kiss, letting out anticipation and the touch starvation built up from their trip abroad.

It was gentle, not too rushed, and incredibly patient, much like Minho.

Jisung wouldn't expect any less.

Minho seemed to be savoring the moment, making it personalized to the man in his arms, testing out the waters for what he wanted.

First he ran his hand through his hair, then he stroked his jaw with his thumb.

Everything was so perfectly timed and Jisung was sure Minho could kill him.

It was the most loving kiss he had ever received.

It wasn't a peck, it wasn't rushed, it was a kiss that validated everything Minho had just told him. It was saying that he was beautiful and worth it, enough, and _perfect_. It was saying everything a kiss from Minho would say.

It seemed to go on forever, deliciously so, decorated with gentle hair tugs and lip bites.

When Minho finally pulls away, Jisung is out of breath, eyes still closed, still holding on to the older's sleep shirt.

He takes a heavy breath, "You kiss exactly as I imagined you would."

Minho smiles, putting their foreheads together, eyebrow raising rudely, "Glad I didn't disappoint."

Jisung maybe wants to cry again, purely out of sheer joy, but he won't.

Jisung shakes his head, smiling brightly, big eyes looking right into Minho's, an emotion that couldn't be described settled there, "Thank you, I don't know what else to say, but thank you."

Minho doesn't have to ask why, he knows what it's about, he only nods his head, maybe he wanted to cry too.

"It's all true, it's all true.”

—

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey
> 
> not much to say today except you guys are all amazing !
> 
> I love seeing your comments they always bring a smile to my face 
> 
> anyways you guys are cool
> 
> feedback is always appreciated :)


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi everyone, thanks for being patient with me.
> 
> it’s late and not quite monday anymore, but i was having some troubles writing this one in time. i hope it doesn’t seem too rushed, and hopefully you know this won’t happen in the future. thank you for being understanding.
> 
> also ! i need to put a warning in because there is a panic attack in this chapter and i don’t want anyone to feel uncomfortable reading it, so feel free to skip it, (there’s a warning)
> 
> but anyways I hope you enjoy :)

Jisung was never one to particularly hate mornings, he usually did struggle getting out of bed (much to Woojin's dismay), but once he was up, he was usually up.

However Jisung had quickly learned to never say never because he hadn't even made a cup of hotel coffee before Seungmin had burst out of the bathroom ready to rant.

He had his classic power walk, he had just gotten out of the shower (he insists on taking showers in the morning and afternoon), and he had a displeased look on his face.

"I have a hypothetical situation."

Jisung rolls his eyes, lightly blowing on his coffee before he takes a sip, he knows that this was definitely _not_ a hypothetical situation, but he would humor him, "Shoot."

Seungmin begins to pace and just from the frantic energy pouring out of him, Jisung could feel his own anxiety spiking up, "Okay so let's say you've been talking to this guy for a while."

Jisung nods, bringing his knees up under his chin on the office chair he was sitting in, "Sure."

Seungmin stops to say this part, "And one night you guys decide to, you know," he pauses not quite wanting to say it, _"go all the_ way."

Jisung quickly places his coffee cup on the desk, shocked expression painting his face, "You had sex with Hyunjin?"

Jisung wants to be supportive for his friend, and he certainly wouldn't slut shame him, but god _damn _he just thought Seungmin wouldn't let it go this far. After the events that transpired and his break down, Jisung was sure he would have cut it off, but the next day it was almost like it never happened, like he couldn't let him go.

Maybe Jisung could understand that.

Seungmin's eyes widen, almost like he didn't realize Jisung would catch on, "No! No, this is a hypothetical situation!"

Jisung's eyebrows furrow, putting his hands on his hips, "Seungmin, I'm not stupid, who else would you be talking about?"

He groans, dropping himself to sit on his bed behind him, "Okay, yes, I had sex with Hyunjin."

Jisung's slowly approaches the younger, sitting next to him, suddenly feeling bad for scolding him so soon, "That's, that's a big step."

Seungmin sighs, raising and dropping his hands in frustration, "Yeah, I know."

Jisung isn't quite sure how to word his next statement, "Was it good?"

The boy laughs at his friend, looking down at his fiddling hands, "Yeah, I mean it was great."

Jisung smiles softly, placing a hand on his to comfort him, "Then it's okay, right?"

Seungmin suddenly leans onto his knees, burning his face in his hands, “Yeah, except it's not."

Jisung furrows his brows, "What do you mean?"

The worried boy sounds a bit miffed at his next statement, "Well I asked him what this meant, I asked if he was gay, if he was gonna come out, if we were gonna be public," he pauses, furrowing his eyebrows, "the infamous 'what are we?'."

Jisung almost feels bad, he can feel what happens next, "And I'm assuming he didn't take it very well."

He nods, picking at his fingers nervously.

The squirrelly boy knew exactly what happened, "Well you're suffering from a classic case, you word barfed on him."

Seungmin seems to not know what he's talking about, incredulous look on his face, "What? No I did not!"

Jisung almost finds it funny how unaware the boy is, "Minnie, every time you go through a big life change with someone you tend to inundate them with questions that they're not ready to answer."

Seungmin stays quiet, not wanting to admit that he was right. Jisung decides to continue, "Up until now he was under the impression that you guys has some sort of friends with benefits situation going on," Jisung gets quieter trying to be more comforting and less critical, "you probably just scared him."

Seungmin face palms him self, face drawn in frustration at this sudden realization, "God, I'm so stupid."

Jisung quickly backtracks, "Hey, hey that's not what I meant, it's probably still fine, what did he say?"

Seungmin sighs over dramatically, "Well he just got super squirmy when I started to ask him things, so he got out of bed and started getting dressed, he said he was gonna take a walk," Seungmin grimaces at the memory, "he said, and I quote, 'Feel free to leave while I'm gone'."

Jisung furrows his brows, slightly pissed, "What a douche."

Seungmin laughs sarcastically, "Yeah, I know."

Jisung stands up, hands on his hips, "I'm gonna best his ass."

Seungmin's eyes widen considerably as he stands up to follow him, not wanting him to start something unnecessary, "Woah, woah, Jisung," he places his hands on his friends shoulders, giving him a serious look, "I can fight my own battles, I can figure it out, it's fine."

The boy only sighs, shoulders physically relaxing, "Fine, but this is the last chance I let you 'figure it out' by yourself, you need to end it with this jerk, you deserve better."

Seungmin smiles, glad his friend cared so much, "I know."

Jisung pulls the boy into a hug, trying to ease the air, staying there for a few moments.

Seungmin is the first to pull away, delighted look on his face, "Okay now hurry up, you can't be late for your date!"

Jisung gasps, hitting his friends shoulder, "It is not a date! Early work is not a date!"

Seungmin is already walking back to the bathroom, "A man who happened to have a steamy moment with another man on the floor of a hotel lobby gets asked by the same man to hit some balls with a bat in a cage for an hour, sounds like a date to me."

Jisung is back in his office chair sipping his coffee when he hears this ridiculousness, "It's not a date, Seungmin!"

The boy yells back from the bathroom, "Looks like a date, sounds like a date, smells like a date, must be a date."

"At least let me have some more standards for our first date."

—

"Good morning!"

As soon as Jisung had walked into the locker room, he could feel the energy that was filling the air.

Jisung smiles brightly, it _was _a pretty good day after all, "Good morning, Jeongin."

Minho was next to his locker, but by now he had turned himself around to lean on it and watch the scene while chuckling at the boy's attitude.

Jeongin quickly runs over to give the older a big hug, "How are you today?"

Jisung smiles again, glancing over at Minho's ever present figure, "It's going quite great actually."

Jeongin smiles as well, eyes scrunching up happily, "Mine too!"

Jisung decides to take his athletic bag over to a bench so he could start changing but Jeongin follows him, standing behind him as he begins to unpack, "Hey, are you going in for early work?"

Jisung chuckles, he would be here this early if he wasn't, "That's the plan."

The younger seems to have had this idea before he had even confirmed, "Ah, then I'll just go with you."

Jisung was perfectly set up to stand up straight and give a worried look to Minho standing right in front of him. The older seems to have the same look on his face, seeming to not have a clue how to get out of this one.

Jisung doesn't want to seem rude, and in any other situation he would have loved to hang out with Jeongin, but he had been looking forward to this _all night_. The last thing he wanted to do was have this ruined last minute.

Minho intervenes before he even realizes, walking around the bench and clapping a hand on the youngest's shoulder, "Ah, sorry man, but Jisung promised me some one on one time today to so he could help me with my bunts."

Thankfully, the boy doesn't seem too disappointed, "Ah, that's fine I'll just hang out with Felix while I practice my pitches, no worries.”

Jisung feels bad, he has a guilty conscience. In his defense, they weren't exactly lying, he just wasn't sure how much work they were going to get done, "Next time for sure though."

Jeongin starts to head towards the door to make his way to the field, throwing out a 'definitely' before he leaves.

Jisung chuckles, shaking his head as he starts to get his uniform out of his bag again.

Suddenly he feels a pair of arms wrap around his waist in a back hug, pair of lips close to his ear, "I was so worried I wouldn't be able to spend my morning with you, Casanova."

Jisung grins, blushing softly though Minho couldn't see, "Would that be so bad?"

He turns around in his arms to put his arms around the older's neck, giggling quietly.

Minho feigns shock, gasping dramatically, "How rude."

Jisung smiles cutely before leaning in for a small peck, not being able to stop his grin as he pulls away, "I'm going to have to change, you know."

Minho doesn't waste time going in for another kiss, acting like this was the last kiss he'd ever get, lips moving against his as he talks, “You're acting like I'd have to leave."

Jisung moves his arm to hit the older's shoulder, feigning shock, "Perv!"

Minho is laughing evilly, "What? I've seen you change in here before."

Jisung still has his mouth open in shock, "It's different now!"

Minho laughs loudly, "No it's not!"

Jisung shakes his head at the older, giggling, "Just go get us a batting cage, old man."

Minho gasps dramatically again, "I am only two years older than you!"

The younger pushes the boy towards the door yelling towards him, "And it's the two years that makes all the difference!"

Minho turns around walking to the door, "Unbelievable!"

Jisung laughs brightly and yells before the door closes, "Perv!"

—

"Welcome to batting cage number 4."

Jisung laughs as he closes the gate door behind him, "How cordial of you, Mr. Lee Know."

Minho laughs, walking over to the younger, "Wait until the slow dance."

With this he takes the younger into his arms, spinning him. Jisung blushes heavily, looking around at the other batting cages to make sure no one saw.

Minho lets him go to pick up his gear in preparation for some practice, "Relax Casanova, I scouted it out and no one in the surrounding batting cages speaks Korean."

Jisung laughs as he picks up Minho's bat for him, "Ah, so I can tell you how hot you are all I want?"

Minho takes the bat from him, leaning in teasingly, "Please do."

He smirks as he walks over to the mound, Jisung leans against the chain fence watching him get in position to bat, "Guess all u have to do is avoid doing things that insinuate a realtionship."

Minho stands up straight, out of his crouched, ready to bat position, he looks shocked, "You think I can't go an hour with out touching you in anyway?"

Jisung shrugs, acting uninterested, "If the shoe fits."

Minho laughs, looking around suspiciously, "I think it's purely a matter of not getting caught my dear Jisungie."

He quickly walks over the younger looking to his left again, there was a player in the cage next to them, but he was engulfed in trying to hit the baseballs being chucked at him by the machine.

Minho steals a quick peck from the boy, smiling widely as he pulls away, looking absolutely mischievous.

Jisung hits the older's chest, mouth open, appalled, "Lee Minho! Someone could have saw!"

Minho shrugs, smirking, reveling in the thrill of it all, "But they didn't."

Jisung's eyes widen more at the level of indifference exuded by the older, he feels his heart race at the risky situation.

He's not sure what's gotten into him, but suddenly, he's pulling the older by his collar into a deep kiss.

Jisung was in love with this feeling, whatever it was.

Minho smiles into the kiss, nipping at the younger's lip as he pulls away. They both giggle like little boys, foreheads leaning against each other. Minho speaks up, "As a wise man once said, don't start something you can't finish, and we most definitely cannot finish here."

Jisung opens his mouth to say something when he hears something.

He jumps up, pushing the older away from him, he most definitely heard something.

Minho has a frantic look on his face, he looks around at the batting cages beside him, no one had paid attention a bit to what they were doing, "What?"

Jisung's eyes are wide open, worry painting his face, "I heard Jeongin's laugh."

Minho groans, "I thought we got rid of him this morning."

Jisung raises his hands and drops them to show that he doesn't know, "Yeah, that's what I thought too but clearly not."

Soon enough, not only Jeongin, but Changbin with his arm suspiciously hanging around Felix's shoulders.

Jisung puts on a happy face for the group, crossing his arms, "Hey! What are you guys doing here?”

Minho doesn't seem to even attempt to hide his feelings as he stands straight faced, arms crossed.

Jeongin speaks up first, "I tried to tell them that you were working alone today but Changbin wouldn't listen."

When Jisung looks at Changbin's satisfied face, he suddenly realized, he knows.

This is a ploy!

"Well I didn't want you guys to be all alone out here." He's smiling, he obviously knows he's interrupting, but he clearly has been against this relationship from the get-go.

Jisung had a right smile, trying to seem unbothered, "Of course."

Changbin snickers and whispers into Felix's ear, giggling like 2 year olds.

What a hypocrite.

—

"Channie, do you want to try some?"

Jisung was sure he was going to throw up.

Chan and Woojin had invited Jisung with him to lunch before the game, but the better part of an hour had been spent third wheeling.

They're undeniably cute, that's for sure, but Jisung wasn't sure how much young love he could stand.

They had made it official a couple days ago, so the honeymoon phase was in full swing.

Chan opens his mouth wide, letting Woojin feed him some of his food.

Just to top it all off Woojin picks up a napkin and wipes Chan's mouth when he's done.

Jisung is sure he gags.

Chan then starts to get up, saying something about going to the bathroom, kissing the oldest on the head before he leaves.

Woojin watches him navigate himself to the bathroom, but once he's out of ear shot, he immediately turns to the youngest, "I need some advice."

Jisung is mid bite, swallowing quickly, it was a rare day when Woojin asked for advice from him, "Uh, sure, what's up?"

Woojin sighs, he looks distraught, this worries Jisung, "Is everything okay with Chan?" It was so early into the relationship so he could only hope everything was okay.

Woojin's eyes widen, quickly correcting him, "No! No, nothing like that."

He buries his face in his hands groaning, "I don't know, it’s kinda stupid.”

Jisung furrows his brow at his statement, bringing a hand over the table to rub the older’s shoulder comfortingly, “Hey, it’s not stupid,” When Woojin looks back up Jisung smiles at him softly, “Someone once told me that if something is bothering you, it’s valid, because it matters to you.” He smiles to himself remembering what Minho said the other night.

This brings a smile to the older’s face, nodding in response, “Yeah, I guess so.”

Jisung smiles brightly, resting his chin on his hand, ready to listen, “Yeah, so tell me what’s on your mind.”

Woojin looks up, searching for answers on the ceiling, “How soon is _too soon_,” he pauses looking down at his hands, mumbling almost, “to tell someone you love them.”

Jisung’s eyes widen, that’s not what he was expecting.

He almost wants to coo at how cute the boy is being, the way he made it seem was that he was having relationship problems, but he really just wants to tell the boy he loves how much he loves him.

“Aw, Woojin,” he reaches over to pinch the boys cheeks, “if you love him you should tell him. There is no specific timeyou have to wait, as long as you love him, you should tell him.”

Woojin blushes deeply, rolling his eyes at the younger. Jisung laughs at the older’s flushed face, “And if it’s any consolation, you guys are clearly already so in love that I would be amazed if Chan wasn’t dying to do the same thing.”

Woojin laughs brightly at the younger, looking up to find Chan making his way back to the table, “Hey, baby.”

Chan grins at the name, smiling cutely as he sits down, “Did I miss anything?”

Jisung saves him, “Only that Woojin is an idiot.”

Chan turns his head to look his boyfriend in the eyes, wrapping an arm around his shoulders, laughing quietly, “Oh well I knew that.”

—

“C’mon, that’s gotta be a foul!”

The game was _not _going well, and that was any understatement. The score was 0-7 in the 8th inning, and you could guess who was on the losing side of that score.

Jisung was cursing to himself on the second base, he was feeling quite pathetic.

The Halos have been on a dry streak for the past couple of games and now Jisung was just fed up. His day was going so great with Minho and Woojin and then all of a sudden this game was putting him in a piss mood.

There were only so many days left of spring training and he just felt like he wasn’t contributing at all.

He was rarely on the field and when he was there was a rare moment when they did well.

He felt like he was some sort of bad luck charm and the only thing that could save him was Minho’s overwhelming good luck.

Jisung however knew the importance of paying attention to the game. The batter was swinging a few times in preparation and the pitcher, Kevin, was digging his cleats in the dirt.

Soon Kevin was winding up, throwing a killer pitch to home, the ball wasn’t really going in a certain path but suddenly Jisung realized it was going straight to him.

He figured this was an easy catch, something he does all the time, but all of a sudden it was in his glove, and then it was not.

He had dropped it.

Jisung scrambled to pick it up and throw it to Kevin, trying to get the man running to third out, but it was too late.

They had scored, _again_.

Jisung took in a deep breath.

He did not need to have one of his fucking spaz attacks on the field.

He had to hold himself together, yet all he could think about was how he dug the team further into a hole that they were being thrown into.

Jisung pulls at his hair nervously, shifting back and forth over the base. He looks over to the dugout, finding Minho, trying to stable himself, he had a worried look on his face, like he wanted to jump over the fence and come hug him, like he could tell what kind of stress Jisung was in.

Seeing his face reminds him that all he had to do was get through the inning, make it through three strikes and he could get off the field, he could hug Minho.

— warning: panic attack

The inning was over before he knew it.

He was running that’s what he knew, maybe that didn’t help his breathing. He was running to the dug out, there awaiting was his coach.

He was saying something, in English of course, but he couldn’t bring himself to try to understand him.

What he did hear though, was not comforting at all.

Nice try.

Nice try.

It, it wasn’t a nice try, it was him trying to tell him that his best wasn’t good enough.

Nice try.

He heard it over and over again, and again like a thumping in the back of his head.

Jisung runs farther into the dug out.

His hat was bothering him, he throws it off onto the bench.

Nice try.

He can’t get those _stupid_ words out of his head.

He runs into the locker room, his hands were starting to shake and his heart was pounding.

Nice try.

He paces back and forth next to the lockers, suddenly he realizes his breathing is frantic, shallow, he can’t breathe.

He feels nauseous, his world was spinning and his skin was itching.

Nice try.

He felt hot, he sits down, surely hyperventilating.

He felt like he was in there for hours though he was only there for seconds.

Nice Try.

Jisung grasps his hair, his heart was beating a mile a minute and then suddenly, he looks up and there’s Minho.

Running into the locker room, terror dotting his face, worry overlaying.

Jisung watches him run over, he looked princely like he was here to save the day, maybe he was.

When he sits down on the bench next to him heholds him by the cheeks, looking him in the eyes, unintentionally calming him down with that intense stare of his, “Shit, Sungie, you gotta slow you’re breathing.”

He sounds panicked, like the energy in the room was influencing him too, “C’mon, baby breath with me.”

Jisung can’t take his wide eyes off the older, but he can feel himself starting to let go.

Minho takes in a deep breath, petting the younger’s head trying to calm him down. Jisung tries to breathe with him, tries to slow down his breathing.

Minho shushes him, watching the younger start to calm, start to breath normally, “Another one, baby, big deep breath.”

Jisung takes another deep breath, in through the nose, out through the mouth.

Minho looks like he might be close to tears, but he looks relieved when he begins to breath normally. He brings the younger’s head to his shoulder to hug him tightly, running a hand through his hair, “Jesus you scared me so much.”

Jisung is still breathing in and out slowly, he nuzzles into the older’s chest lovingly, “I’m sorry.”

Minho lifts the boys face to look him in the eye, he cups his cheek with one hand as Jisung leans into it, not being able to take his eyes off of him, “Oh god, you don’t need to be sorry, you did nothing wrong.”

Jisung sighs, leaning back in to hug the older, “Yeah nothing except brutally screw up the game for us.”

Minho shakes his head and kisses the boys hair, “There was no winning that game for us, whether you played or not.”

Jisung laughs, glad Minho kept his sense of humor even now, “Thank you, I don’t think I’ve ever calmed down that quickly before,” he almost feels ashamed to admit it, “not from that big of a,” he says it quietly like it’s a secret, “panic attack.”

Minho smiles to himself, petting the boys head again, “I’m just glad you’re okay.”

Jisung smiles softly, bringing his head up again to look at the older, “I think I could get used to you calling me baby, preferably not just when I’m having a panic attack.”

Minho laughs lightly, “That could be arranged.”

—

Minho was attached to Jisung’s hip from the moment in the locker room all the way to his hotel room. He had even booted Changbin from his place in the van to sit with him on the ride home. However Jisung was trying to figure out how to break the news to him now that they had reached his hotel room.

“I think this is where you have to leave me otherwise Seungmin gets a rude awakening.”

Minho laughs, bringing the younger’s arms around his neck as he hugs the boys waist, “Nooo, don’t make me.”

Jisung laughs, studying the older’s handsome face, “God, what would I do without you.”

Minho smirks, “You were doing pretty fine a couple days ago.”

Jisung rolls his eyes, “Shut up, let me have my moment.”

Minho giggles as he leans in for a kiss, capturing his lips in a sweet kiss as he rubs the boys hip bones soothingly.

Jisung smiles into the kiss, going in for another, pressing himself to the older, wanting to be as close as possible. He relaxes, sighing into it, playing with the hairs at the back of Minho’s neck.

When the older pulls away, he puts their foreheads together, smiling lightly.

Minho hums, pulling away to look at him fully, “What do you say we go out to see LA tomorrow, we have a day off.”

Jisung’s eyebrows raise, “We do?”

Days off during spring training were few a far between, most of the time it was practice, lunch, game, repeat, so a day off surprised the boy.

Minho laughs at the boys surprise, “Yeah, you need something relaxing,” he looks at the younger considering it, “I’ll take you out for lunch,” he suddenly smiles, “we can call it a date.”

Jisung can’t hide his smile, he looks thrilled, “Hmm,” he feigns hesitancy, “I _guess _so.”

Minho tickles his sides in retaliation, Jisung squealing only to cover his mouth realizing it was late and people in the neighboring hotel rooms might not like to be awoken by his yelling.

Minho takes away the younger’s hand, raising his eyebrows, “So?”

Jisung gives him one last peck, smiling brightly, “It’s a date.”

—

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for bearing with me, i hope it was still okay. 
> 
> i’m not really sure how i feel about this chapter, but it is what it is.
> 
> feedback is appreciated:)


	7. Chapter 7

You'll never guess but, Jisung was nervous.

He was excited, don't get him wrong, he was going on a _date_, with _Lee Minho_, but if he made it through this day without having a heart attack it would be a miracle. He had a lot of experience with keeping his cool while freaking out inside, considering this was the story of his life, but today, he wasn't sure he would be able to contain himself.

He had gotten up unnecessarily early, despite it being his day off, maybe it was his brain prematurely making his heart race, but he was dressed and ready before he even knew it. It seemed early considering it was dark, but it also could have been the black out curtains shielding the light.

"Yah, Han Jisung, why are you up so early, bro we don't even have practice today.”

Seungmin was rubbing his eyes, bed hair poking up everywhere. Jisung's eyes widen from where he was sat on his bed, tying his shoes, "Ah, sorry I tried not to wake you up."

The boy sits up in bed, sniffing tiredly, yawning, "What time is it?"

Jisung picks up his phone, checking it, he wasn't sure either, "Its already 9, it's not that early, drama queen."

Seungmin's brows furrow in confusion, seeming disturbed that Jisung was the one telling him this and not the other way around.

Jisung rolls his eyes, waving him off as he goes back to finish tying his shoes, "Agh, just go back to sleep."

Seungmin shakes his head, trying to rid himself of the sleepiness, "No, no, I'm up, I'm up." he scoots himself to sit on the edge of the bed, rubbing his eyes again, "Where are you going?"

Jisung opens and closes his mouth, "I'm not sure."

Seungmin gives his friend a dirty look, dumbfounded, he knew it was early, but he was being terribly vague, "The hell is that supposed to mean?"

Jisung blushes, messing with his fingers nervously as his friend walks past him to the bathroom.

He yells from the bathroom, sound of the sink turning on and off every once in a while, "I have a question."

The squirrelly boy is almost relieved that Seungmin dropped it so quickly, he'd rather save the embarrassment for later, "Uh, shoot."

Seungmin walks out of the bathroom, hair slightly less messy, toothbrush hanging out of his mouth. The boy takes it out to talk, but still is slightly incoherent with all the toothpaste in his mouth, "Let's say a guy-"

Jisung groans loudly, "Kim Seungmin, we all know who you're talking about so do us all a favor and skip the hypothetical, just tell me what happened." he pauses looking at the boy leaning against the wall idly, still brushing his teeth, grimacing, "And finish brushing your teeth first."

Seungmin rolls his eyes at his friend, reluctantly returning the bathroom to spit out his tooth paste.

The boy walks out, arms crossed, coming to sit at the edge of Jisung's bed with him.

Jisung waits a few moments, hoping he would stop being stubborn for a second, finally growing patient, "Seungmin just tell me what happened."

He sighs dramatically, "Hyunjin claims that he's," he holds up air quotes, "'fluid', that he just," air quotes again, "'goes with the flow.'"

Jisung furrows his brows, failing to see the problem, "And?"

Seungmin has a shocked look on his face, like he was expecting a bigger reaction, "And that makes no sense!"

Jisung can't help the confused look painting his face, surely looking lost.

His friend rolls his eyes, like he was amazed he even had to explain himself, "He likes guys, he's gay!"

Jisung can't help but laugh, it was comical, almost like it was a bit. However the other boy failed to find the humor, "What?" he shoves his friends shoulder, he's still laughing, "bro, what's so funny?"

The boy gets a hold of himself, smiling still, "That's just _not_ how that works."

Seungmin furrows his brows, silent for a second, "Then how the hell does it work?"

Jisung chuckles, shaking his head, "You're the worst gay ever."

The boy hits his friends shoulders, scowling at him, "Shut up."

Jisung rolls his eyes, sighing in preparation, "Look, just because you like guys doesn't mean you're gay," he pauses trying to figure out how to say it, "a lot of people say sexuality is a spectrum, some may be completely straight, some may be completely gay, but Hyunjin, for example, is somewhere in the middle."

Seungmin looks like he's struggling, like he is can't wrap his simple head around it, "No, yeah, I still don't get it."

Jisung rolls his eyes, standing up to make his point, pacing, "Let's say there's a world where the stereotype is you either like cake or you like ice cream."

Seungmin's eyes widen considerably, pouting, "But I like ice cream _and_ cake."

Jisung gets an excited look on his face, pointing at his friend, glad he said that, "Precisely, my dear Seungmin! There are some people who like both ice cream and cake, there are some who like neither and _don’t_ forget about _ice cream cake_."

Seungmin's nods along, loving the set up for this one, "There are also people who prefer cake, but every once and a while, they won't mind to have a little ice cream, and vice versa."

“I'm not getting the connection here."

Jisung looks up, searching for how to word this, "Well, in Hyunjins case, if someone handed him some ice cream, he would gladly take it, but if someone handed him some cake instead, he would would have no problem, and I'm _sure_ he would _love_ ice cream cake."

"He goes with the flow, Minnie, he likes whatever he comes across that's fuckable."

Seungmin opens his mouth, clearly going to say something, Jisung starts before he can, "And _no _I'm not saying he is going to fuck desserts, we're done with the analogy."

Seungmin pouts, disappointed, "All I'm saying is your view on sexuality is outdated, you've been spending too much time in the sports world."

Jisung ends, sitting back next to his friend, smiling satisfied. Seungmin still has confusing knitting his brows, "So, Hyunjin isn't gay, and he's not bisexual because he would have just said that, so what is he?"

Jisung shrugs, "I mean, it's not really my place to say, but I'm guessing he just chooses not to label it."

The boy opens his mouth to speak yet again, but is cut off by a knocking on the hotel door.

Jisung hops up, maybe he wasn't as nervous anymore, Seungmin's ditzy personality calms him quite well.

Seungmin stands up with him, following him to the door, "Wait, you never told me where you were going."

His friend only turns around, smiling at him before opening the door revealing an excited Minho, smiling prettily, "Hi there."

Jisung leans up for a peck, wrapping an arm around the older's waist for a hug.

Seungmin looks between the two, eyes wide, "I am not quite used to that."

Jisung laughs turning around, standing opposite of Seungmin now, arm still secure around Minho, "Well, you're going to have to soon."

Minho chuckles attractively, or at least in Jisung's opinion, "Sorry to steal him away on your day off."

Jisung waves it off, "He probably had a dick appointment with Hyunjin anyway."

Seungmin hits his friends shoulders, "No, actually I do not! And don't start spreading that around."

Jisung sticks his tongue childishly, "He probably already knew with all that ogling you do."

Seungmin looks ready to retaliate when Minho pulls the boy in his arms back, "Okay you two, as much as I would love to watch you guys scratch each others eyes out, I think we should go."

Jisung waves smugly to Seungmin as he walks away, Minho's arm around his shoulders.

He tries not to blush when Minho tells him his face is too pretty for it to get scratched up.

—

"I can't believe you got us a taxi, Chan is free, taxi is expensive."

Minho rolls his eyes as he helps Jisung out of the taxi, closing the door behind him, "I didn't want to bother Chan, it's his day off too, he would have a much better time hanging out with Woojin than being our personal chauffeur."

Jisung blushes deeply as he realizes Minho wasn't going to let go of his hand after he was done helping him out of the car.

"Plus I wanted some more alone time with you."

The younger blushes, profusely, Minho intertwining their fingers didn't quite help either.

It was the first time he had held Minho's hand.

It was nice, lovely really, it made his heart flutter, but Minho seemed fine, calm. Under such heartwarming circumstances Jisung was completely amazed that Minho could keep his cool so easily.

He was very sly really, slipping his hand in ever so quietly, Jisung was holding the older's hand before he even noticed, "You're very slick, you know."

Minho looks down at the boy walking next to him, smirking, "I have no idea what you're talking about."

Jisung opens his mouth to say something, but soon the older is bringing their intertwined hands up to his lips, kissing Jisung's hand gently.

The younger flushes, big smile on his face, but Minho still pretends to be unphased, "So where do you want to eat, we have all of LA at our disposal."

Jisung looks around at the city street they were walking down, awed by the busy sidewalks and vibrant stores, "God, how does anyone even chose."

Minho laughs, smiling graving his face as he leans down to kiss the younger's head sweetly, "Lets just walk around and when we see a place that looks good, we'll eat there."

Jisung nods cutely, looking up at the older lovingly. It amazed Jisung that he could be with Minho so openly without judgement, that no one was judging them, holding hands, being who they were. It was crazy how comfortable he felt in a foreign city, but maybe it was just the boy keeping his company.

Jisung spots a store, huge department store windows, and in it was a crazy display with colorful summer clothing.

Minho notices the boys stare, "You wanna go inside?"

Jisung startles, looking back at the boy holding his hand, eyes wide, "Oh, uh, I was just looking at the display."

Minho shrugs, "We can still go inside, we have no specific destination, Casanova."

Jisung smiles, he was sure he was falling in love with this easy going feeling, not having anything to worry himself about.

—

"Here try some of this."

They had settled on a a burger place, after going back and forth between the Korean Barbeque place across the street for what seemed like half an hour. They finally decided on the burger place as they could wait to get Korean food when they went home.

The thought that they merely had a week or so left of spring training broke Jisung's heart, he wasn't quite ready to leave.

Jisung leans over slightly to be fed by the older who was holding some fries. Jisung chews, eyes widening, "Jesus those are some damn good fries," he returns to his plate, poking a tater tot with his fork, "taste this."

Minho looks adorable as he opens his mouth expectantly. He chews while his expression slowly grows into one of delight, "Shit, that's good, what's that called again?"

Jisung smiles, laughing cutely at the boy talking with his mouth full, "Tater tots."

Minho nods in approval, continuing to eat his own dish.

As much as Jisung didn't want to admit it, he realized that Minho and himself were kinda being _that couple_, like a Chan and Woojin kind of couple. Yet as much as he would have hated this in any other situation, he couldn't quite bring himself to care, spending time with his—_well_ with Minho was beyond expectations.

Jisung suddenly laugh, he contains himself, he smiles like he is going to share this joke, "You know, Seungmin tried to tell me that day we went in for early work was our first date."

Minho almost chokes on his food, leaning forward to laugh, "That's hardly a date, the first one has to be better than that."

Jisung points at the older, eyebrows raised, agreeing, "Yes! That's what I said."

Minho laughs brightly, staring at the boy in front of him, “Ah, damn.” He looks away, smiling at something.

Jisung laughs at the boy, slapping his arm playfully, “What?”

Minho shakes his head, looking back at the younger, “You’re so cute, Han Jisung, it’s not fair.”

Jisung blushes, hiding his face in his hands like a kid, “Shut up!”

Minho giggles, intertwining their hands across the table, “You know I’m right.”

Jisung has a shy smile on his face, looking down at their hands, playing with the older’s fingers, “Thank you for taking me out today.”

Minho smiles, raising their hands to place a kiss on the boys hand sweetly, “I’m glad you came.”

Jisung stays silent, soaking up his time with Minho. He realizes that maybe they were so lovey doves it was sickening, but he was just so _happy_. It was like he was in a story book where nothing could go wrong, and he was the main character. Everything was perfect.

Minho suddenly speaks up again, “You know what makes me upset," the boy across from him only hums in response, "it's our day off and Jeongin is spending his time practicing."

Jisung looks up suddenly from his food, concern knitting his eyebrows together, "He's what?"

Minho nods sadly, moving around his fries, "Yeah, I know."

"Did no one want to go out with him?"

Minho shrugs, "I asked him what he was going to do today and he said he was going to the field to throw some pitches."

Jisung frowns deeply, "That sucks."

Minho shrugs again, "Kid needs to learn to be reckless every once in a while, he's been eating, sleeping, and breathing baseball his whole life, he was never a teenager."

Jisung is about to say something when it seems Minho gets an idea, "Oh god, what?"

Minho seems like he's proud he came up with the idea, however he's got excited written all over him as he leans forward like he's telling a secret, "Let's take him out tonight."

Jisung opens his mouth, shocked, "What? No! You mean like to a bar?"

Minho only nods, smiling devilishly at the plan forming before his eyes.

Jisung furrows his brows, shaking his head, "No way! You have to be 21 here anyway."

Minho seems momentarily fooled by this, until he suddenly waves it off, "We'll just find an 18+ club, theres plenty in LA."

Jisung narrows his eyes at the boy across from him, "This can't be a good idea."

Minho smiles brightly, Jisung can't seem to stay mad at that, "It's a _great_ idea my dear Jisung, you just can't see it yet."

—

"Why am I here?"

Minho tsks at the youngest, hands placed on his shoulders as he practically pushes the boy farther into the club, "Because you're 18 and have failed to meet too many milestones."

Jeongin rolls his eyes, "I told you I wasn't really in the mood."

Minho pats him on the back as he lead him to a couch, "It's either now or never kid."

Jeongin slumps onto the couch, swatting away Minho's hands. The oldest comes to sit next to the boy, Jisung following suit, sitting on the opposite side.

Minho places an arm around the young boy, looking out a the crowd in front of them, "Okay so what we feeling, a little dancing, a little drink?”

Jeongin throws the boy's arm off him, rolling his eyes once again, "None of the above."

Minho sighs, standing up, reaching for Jisung's hand, "C'mon, Jisung-ah, lets go get a drink."

Jisung hesitantly grasps the older's hand, standing with him. He feels bad that he's leaving the younger, but he figures Minho is just giving him some space for a second.

Minho leads the boy, dragging him through the groups of other people, but holding onto his hand tightly as to not lose him.

When the people thin out the bar is nearby, the couple walk up to the bar slowly. Jisung hooks his chin around the older's shoulder, pouting slightly.

The bartender comes over eventually, asking for Minho's ID, he wasn't really sure what he was saying, but he could take a guess.

The man looked at the ID in the light, making a joke about how he just recently turned 21, of course it didn't quite reach Minho so he just smiled and nodded, Jisung silently laughing on his shoulder.

As the bartender leaves, Jisung complains quietly, "Why couldn't we go to a gay bar? This place is full of hets."

Minho chuckles as he gets out some money to pay the bartender, "I didn't want to assume his sexuality, being so quickly immersed in a gay bar would probably scare him. Gotta let him test the waters first."

Jisung sighs, nodding, "Ugh, I hate it when you're right."

Minho smiles sweetly, turning his head to capture the younger's lips in a kiss, "Because it happens so often."

Jisung rolls his eyes playfully, stealing another quick peck before sitting down at the bar with the older.

Minho looks towards the couch, finding Jeongin and a girl, obviously she was shy, but she was flirting nonetheless, "Look, Jeongin’s already got game, she's pretty."

Jisung looks surprised at how quickly he drew someone in, but then again, he was young and attractive, these things didn't take long, "Should we go save him?"

Minho shakes his head, smiling slightly, proudly maybe, "No, not yet, let him have a bit more fun."

Jisung nods in agreement, directing his attention to the older, propping up his chin on his hand, "You're cute."

He may be mistaken, but the younger was sure Minho was blushing, giggling even, "What a change of attitude, Casanova. I feel like this should be the other way around."

Jisung laughs, shrugging, _"Excuse_ me, I can be direct."

Minho giggles, roughing up the younger's hair, "Not exactly one your strong suits."

Jisung pouts, patting down his hair in an attempt to fix it, "I take it back, you're not cute, you're mean."

Minho opens his mouth, feigning disbelief, "Aw, c'mon Casanova, you don't mean that."

Jisung crosses his arms, turning away from the older on his barstool. The older wraps his arms around the boy from behind, squeezing the life out of him while he kisses his cheek, "Okay! Okay! I surrender!"

Minho turns the boy around, leaning towards to boy, placing his hands on his knees to come over and kiss him, lingering there for a few moments.

Minho pulls away slightly, looking back and forth between the boy's eyes, slight smile gracing his face, a glint in his eye. Jisung suddenly jumps up, breaking whatever trance, reaching for the older's hand. Minho only stares at it, unsure of what the boy is asking, "C'mon, let's go dance." he gestures to the moving masses behind them with his head, smiling devilishly.

Minho gets up, holding the offered hand, smirking, "Aren't you scared we'll scare the heteros?"

Jisung laughs, throwing his head back as he does so, "I think the only thing we'll be doing is showing them up with our superior dance moves."

Minho laughs brightly, eyes raised as he stands in front of the boy finally on the dance floor, "Oh really? And you're a good dancer?"

The pair have already started to idly move to the music, not wanting to be the only ones standing in the middle of the dancing crowd, "When I need to be." Jisung shrugs nonchalantly, but there's a glint in his eye.

Minho nods sarcastically, lip hitting out, "Okay, I believe you," he takes the younger's arms, placing them around his neck, "I guess we'll find out though."

The pair knew the music was meant for grinding, but neither wanted to over step bounds, it was still _very new_.

Minho leans his forehead against the boys, intense stare and all, maybe it was the light, but his eyes looked darker tonight, more mysterious. Jisung couldn't help but find the boys lips tempting, as always. He figured kissing him would be a safe bet, considering this had been established as a perfectly good pass time, he couldn’t help the twist I’m his stomach though.

Jisung leans in and he can feel the older's grip on his waist tighten in anticipation. At first it was light, something they were used to, but Minho seemed hard pressed to control himself, deepening it quickly.

It was a slow kiss, as always with Minho, leaving more to be desired everytime. Jisung figured he could get used to making out with him, it was quite nice.

The older slyly brought the younger's hips to his, making the younger gasp in surprise. Minho let his hands roam the boy's back, slowly making his way down to his ass, squeezing slightly.

It took the boy by surprise, making him moan slightly onto the older's tongue. Jisung, as much as he was loving this, did _not _want this to happen at a club, he held more respect for himself than that.

Minho in response to the younger pulling, leaned down to kiss the younger's neck sweetly, probably understanding, "Mm—Minho, can we—" the boy spots something over the older's shoulder, "Shit, is that—is that Hyunjin."

Minho immediately turns himself around, looking in horror to find the mentioned boy.

Hwang Hyunjin, was off in a corner, women surrounded him, men as well, it was a sight. But what really caught your eye, was Hwang Hyunjin organizing a _line of coke_, with his credit card. Jisung couldn't help but stare when he leaned down with his rolled up dollar bill and snorted it, without even blinking, no hesitation.

Minho breaks Jisung out of his stars, hitting his shoulder gesturing that they needed to go, "Shit, do you think he saw us?"

Jisung's eyes were still wide, not finding it in himself to move, opting for Minho to drag him by the arm in search of Jeongin, "Jesus he’s too coked up to notice."

Jisung laughs sarcastically, not bothering to respond.

As they approach the couch, Minho stops dead in his tracks, “Jeongin get up, we gotta go.”

Jeongin has wide eyes when he pulls away from the girl he was kissing, seeming like he was caught doing a crime. He scrambles up, not even giving a second glance to the girl who was previously on top of him.

Jisung heard Minho whispering under his breathe, “What the hell is going on?”

—

The previously sunny California day, had unexpectedly turned into a rainy one while they were out. However much to their relief a cloud had passed, and their was a moment of relief, leaving only a damp street glowing a purple neon hue, lit up by the endless city lights.

Jeongin walked in the middle, sullenly, he was weirdly quiet considering he almost always had something to say.

Minho and Jisung had been eyeing each other for most of the walk, trying to convince the other to talk to the boy, figure out what was wrong.

Minho was the one who caved, not being able to resist his man's puppy dog eyes. He rolls his eyes before he speaks up, "C'mon man she couldn't have been _that_ bad of a kisser."

Jisung's eyes widen, this was _not _what he was supposed to say. Jeongin laughs sarcastically, shaking his head, "It's not that."

Jisung and Minho share a look of concern before directing their attention back to the youngest. The squirrelly boy looks timid when he asks, "Do you want to talk about it?"

Jeongin smiles tightly, looking between the two, "I guess so."

Jisung smiles softly, nodding to the boy.

Jeongin gives both boys a serious look, "But you seriously can't tell everyone."

Jisung and Minho nod attentively.

They reach the bus stop, Minho was not paid enough to afford _another taxi _all the way back to the outskirts of LA, they were taking the bus.

Jeongin slumps down on the bench, the couple coming on either side of him. He's silent for a few moments, watching the passing cars, the water kicked up by the wheels.

"I got offered a spot on the Los Angeles Angels official roster."

Jisung gasps, that was big fucking news, "Holy shit, Jeongin, that's great!"

Jeongin sinks into himself, he seems to shake, whether the cold or his emotions, it was unclear.

Jisung furrows his brows as Minho watches silently concern lacing his features, "Whats wrong?"

Jeongin sighs, twiddling with his fingers nervously, "I don't know, I guess I just feel like I would be ending up like all the other great baseball players of Korea, leaving my country for the big leagues, leaving my home."

Jisung frowns, he hadn't really thought about it like that.

"I have a life in Korea, my family, my friends, a _contract_." He leans his head back against the wall of the bus stop, bringing his hands up to rub his face tiredly, "It's hard to just _leave_."

Jisung looks down at his hands, he had been expecting to give advice to the younger, to console him, but, he wasn't sure what to say.

Jeongin laughs sarcastically, "Yeah, I know, me and my first world problems." he leans forward, placing his elbows on his knees, propping himself up with his hands, "I just don't know what the fuck to do."

"I think you should take it."

Minho was straight faced, something that he was good at, never the emotional type, "I think you'll regret it if you don't. It's going to be hard, but it's your dream, right?"

Jeongin has a look on his face, though it wasn't quite describable, conflicted maybe, "I—" he opens and closes his mouth, like he wasn't sure, "yeah, it is."

Minho furrows his brows, "Is it?"

Jeongin looks down at his hands, "I've been thinking about that a lot lately, you know, is this really what I want to do?"

He laughs sarcastically, sadly maybe, "At first I thought I was crazy even questioning it, of course it is, but then I questioned it, for the first time in my life."

"Is this really _really_ what I want to do?"

He sniffs, maybe because it's cold, maybe because he's sad, "And I'm pretty sure I had a mid-life crisis, not _really_ mid-life, but you know what I mean. I was fucking terrified, because what the hell else would I do, I barely have a high school education, and I don't know shit about anything else."

"And it was tearing me up and yet I couldn't say anything, because I'm not allowed to tell anyone about this was a _special offer_ extended _specifically to me_, and we wouldn't want to _upset any of the other players_. I haven't been myself these past couple of days, I've been over compensating, trying to ignore it, been weirdly chirpy, annoying maybe."

Jisung rubs the boy’s back comfortingly, shaking his head, as if to disagree, Jeongin could never be annoying.

"But it all kinda hit me at once, and I was sitting on a couch in a club, by myself, er, at first, and then I was being approached by some girl, and, and I was kissing her, which was _awful_ by the way, and—" he seems like he wants to cry, maybe he will, "_god_ I just am so tired."

Jisung brings the boys head to rest on his shoulder, letting the boy cry, he needed to.

Minho rubs the boy's arm up and down comfortingly, tight smile on his face, "You don't have to decide now, Jeonginnie, you just don't have to."

—

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi! 
> 
> i made it! slightly concerned my chapters are getting worse and worse, but i literally had the whole break to work on this and could not get inspired. so here i am finishing the chapter about 10:47 pm my time (still monday) with a botched editing job and a confusing story line, that is probably shitty.
> 
> but you can’t say i was late this time! 
> 
> ps. i feel kinda bad i made seungmin so dumb in this lmaooo he’s actually so smart idk where this character development is coming from
> 
> anyways thank you for supporting anyway ya’ll dope as hell.
> 
> feedback is appreciated:)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i’m so sorry for the wait !
> 
> i will let you read before i bombard you with excuses :)
> 
> also i accidentally left in a song that i used to get me in the mood for writing that section, so i just left it in, feel free to listen to it with that part of you want 
> 
> enjoy :)

It was a day Jisung and Seungmin had dreaded.

They were switching rooms.

It was approaching the last week of Spring Training, and Woojin was forcing everyone to switch rooms one final time.

It was weird to think about, how close the end was. Yet the future of the relationships that have been made here, seemed unclear.

It was like no one wanted to talk about it. You went to practice and a game every day and when it was over you were one day closer to going home. It was scary.

What would happen?

Jisung felt like he was flying yet at the same time he felt that baggage was pulling him down. The problems, the issues, the gossip, the _cocaine addicts_.

Jisung was not sure how he was going to tell Seungmin. He deserved to know, _obviously_, but it wasn't a comfy thing to bring up, and it certainly wasn't something he could just tell him out of the blue. The problem with switching rooms was the less he saw him, the less he'd want to tell him. It was like the universe was telling him he shouldn't.

Except he should.

He just didn't quite want to.

"Woojin, do we _have_ to?"

Seungmin was practically hanging on the older's arm, begging him to let him stay with Jisung. Woojin rolls his eyes, roughing up the boys hair, "Yes, you have to."

Seungmin looks up at the ceiling suspiciously, "Whaaat if you suddenly change your mind?" The boy heavily nudges the oldest, trying to bribe him with a 20 dollar bill. He wiggles his brows suggestively, "this is like more than 23,000 won, a fair sum if I do say so myself."

Woojin looks unimpressed, pushing the younger off of him, "You will survive for a week without sleeping in the same room."

Jisung hears the butt end of this conversation as he drags his suitcase out of the hotel room into the hallway. The boy drops his bag as he runs over to his friend, holding his arm while giving him the saddest look he could muster, "C'mon, Woojin, buddy ol' pal, look at us."

Woojin stares at the pair, arms crossed and unamused, "We can't just _separate_," Jisung's eyes are wide as he talks, like he's begging, "we are two peas in a pod, cut from the same cloth," Jisung stretches for another idiom, cringing as he thinks, "uh, birds of a feather?"

Seungmin shakes his head, even he knew it wasn't going to happen. Woojin sighs as he rubs his eyes, almost speaking to himself, "I knew you guys would be a pain in my ass to separate." Woojin claps his hands together, manager mode on, "Look, Jisung, Changbin is in room 1927, _please_ take your stuff there so we aren't late for practice _again_."

Jisung does one final pout, trying to gain the older's sympathy, "But—" Woojin gives him a look, one that's says he is _not _playing, "Fine."

Jisung hugs his friend dramatically one last time while. Woojin rolls his eyes, "You're the worst!"

—

"Lee Felix! You better be in here!" Jisung

bounds into the athletic training office, bright energy filling the room. He wasn't going to let the morning bring the rest of his day to a halt, this very well could be a glorious day waiting to happen.

Felix peeks his head out of a door, like he was hoping he was hearing things. His eyes widen, smiling when he sees Jisung standing in the hallway. He shushes him, still not being able to contain his laughter, "Shhh, keep in mind this is still a work place, not a playground."

Jisung feigns confusion, responding sarcastically, "Well it would be so much more fun if you worked at a playground," he begins to ponder, scratching his chin, "although that would be weird, that's how you catch a case."

Felix narrows his eyes at the older, entirely unimpressed with his jokes. His focus shifts to his bosses office, trying to crane his head to see if he had noticed them yet, however Jisung's yelling had probably alerted him as soon as he walked in. The Australian grabs his friend by the arm, taking him into an examination room quickly, "I gotta look like I'm doing my job or I don't get my credit."

Jisung is thrown like a rag doll onto the examination table, as Felix grabs a clip board. The Australian plops onto his rolling chair, switching to English, "Okay so what brings you in today, I'm sorry, what's your name? Han Jisung?" he tops it off by horribly pronouncing the boys name.

He looks unimpressed, blinking at him, "Ha _ha__, _you're _so _funny." Felix smiles nicely, like a true doctor, "Ah, I'm so sorry to hear that _your arm is sore from all the extra batting you’ve been doing_, you must be over working yourself."

Jisung opens his mouth, obviously going to protest, but the Aussie continues before he can start, "No worries, all you need is a bit of physical therapy." He adds a smile at the end, perfectly selling the domestic doctor sense.

Jisung doesn't argue when Felix begins to massage and work his arm, as much as he wouldn't like to admit it, his arm _had _been bothering him. Felix talks to him idly as he works, focused look on his face, "I can't believe you haven't come in here yet, some people come in here every morning."

Jisung shrugs, "I don't know, I didn't grow up with one, I rarely use the one at the Twins, I guess I'm stubborn."

Felix furrows his brows, "Theres nothing wrong with taking care of yourself, you're not a pussy or whatever toxic masculinity has told you just because you're taking care of yourself."

Jisung looks down at his lap, "Oh, yeah, yeah, I know, you're right, it's probably just me." Felix nods, smiling slightly, "Just making sure."

The boy watches his friend, move his arm around, rolling his shoulder back, "It's crazy to see you just like a doctor." Felix corrects him quickly, _"Athletic Trainer."_ Jisung rolls his eyes, "Whatever, same shit," the boy giggles once more, "you just seem so mature in doctor mode, contrary to every other interaction I've ever had with you."

Felix laughs, smile bright, "Just you wait until I graduate."

"I'll be there!" His joy quickly muted. Jisung smiles sadly, realizing he might not see his new friend after this. He quiets noticeably, "We will try to see each other again, right?"

Felix hits the arm in his hands, scowling at his friend, "Are you crazy? Of course we will."

Jisung smiles at this, shaking his head, it was cool that he had made so many friendships and relationships that he could see lasting beyond this three week period, "I changed my mind, maybe I won't want to see you."

Felix pinches him, making Jisung flinch, slapping his hand away. When he settles his demeanor changes, "So, hows the mans?"

Felix seems to choke, maybe he snickers, "I have no idea what your talking about." Jisung scowls at the boy, "Dude, just tell me about Changbin."

Felix furrows his eyebrows in concentration, maybe confusion too, he massages a bit harder, "I don't know," he lets go of the boys arm frustratedly, "It's so _good_ sometimes, and then all of a sudden it's so _cold_." Felix hops up onto the examination table with his friend, staring down at his hands, "I think he's struggling with this whole thing, like he can't make up his mind. Does that make sense?"

Jisung opens his mouth, about to ask him to elaborate, but Felix doesn't let him, "It's like he's searching for the right thing to do, and some days it's seems he's found this in me, like he's living his life freely with me. Then some days, it's like his usual aura, his spirt, it draws itself in, like he's afraid of me."

Jisung thinks Felix's words are beautiful, but they've been chewed over, like he's been thinking about it a lot, "Have you talked to him about it?"

Felix shrugs, "It's seemingly impossible to approach someone about something about that."

Jisung nods, knowing the difficulty. Felix ponders again, thinking out loud, "I think his head is in it, he spends all his time thinking about us, I just know, good or bad, but his heart isn't, and that's the problem. I guess it feels like he's forcing it, and I don't want him to force it."

Jisung sighs, knowing Changbin makes this harder than it has to be, "I think a lot of his problem is that he can't seem to wrap his head around it, he's holding himself back, he's scared."

Felix nods, thinking hard, "I get that, but if it's so hard for him why would he start this?"

Jisung smiles softly, small chuckle, "You can't quite choose who you fall in love with."

Felix rolls his eyes at this, he was still not satisfied. Jisung wraps an arm around his friends shoulders, squeezing him slightly, "Someone's gotta be the one to change him, and I think it's you my dear."

Felix groans loudly, "Why'd I have to get stuck with him?"

Jisung laughs, pushing the younger playfully. Felix seems to be in a better mood, trying to look at it positively, "Is Minho ever like this with you?"

Jisung shakes his head, smiling at the thought of the boy, "No, no not yet, I mean, I don't think he would but, it's only been a couple weeks you know? Everything's still so new."

Felix laughs shaking his head, "What am I even talking about, you guys are basically perfect."

Jisung shakes his head, "Don't jinx it."

—

Jisung was trying to stay positive, a lot of things had happened today, and the game was pretty shit, but one thing he was sure of was that seeing Minho after a long day could completely turn the tide.

Minho, however, looks like he's seen a ghost, shuffling over, eyes wide. Jisung approaches him hesitantly, "Are you okay?"

Jisung had waited a while for him to arrive, there was no one else in the locker room, but still Minho was acting entirely weird, "Minho?"

He shakes his head to clear his features, however the amazement was still heavy on his features, "Yeah, uh, I—I," he has a small smile, "one of the coaches just told me that he would be interested to have me on his team."

Jisung's eyes widen, he immediately goes to hug the boy, "Holy shit, Minho! That's amazing!"

Minho is still a stick, like he's unable to move, the boy hugging him moves him to a bench, sitting him down, "Minho! That's fucking insane!" Jisung is completely faced towards the older, hands on his thigh comfortingly, "Minho?"

He clears his throat, finally moving, letting his head fall to where he looks at the hands on his legs, "This is crazy."

Jisung laughs, he nods, "Well yeah, I mean you have a lot to think about."

Minho's demeanor changes, he furrows his brow, looking to the younger, confused, "What do you mean?"

Jisung is equally confused, he opens and closes his mouth once, "Well uh, you know leaving your home, your family," he gets quieter, "or _me_,” he shakes his head, bright smile reappearing, "it's just a lot to think about."

Minho scoffs, shaking his head, "I have nothing to think about."

Jisung smiles, there was no way he could just give this up for him, "Minho, are you sure—"

Minho cuts him off, "I'm going to take it, and you're not going to stop me."

Jisung feels like he was slapped in the face.

His breath hitches, his mouth is frozen open, "W-what?"

Minho scoffs again, standing up, letting Jisung's hands leave his body, "Look, Jisung, I have to take this."

Jisung furrows his brows, feeling small from where he is on the bench, looking up at this Minho, "I _get_ that, but," he takes a fortifying breath, hating how shaky his voice already was, "I just thought you would be a _bit_ more hesitant to just _leave_."

Minho shakes his head, pacing, "Jesus, look how high and mighty you've gotten, we've been together, what, two weeks? And you think that I should give this up over you?"

Jisung stands up, incredulous look on his face, amazed by the bullshit he's hearing, "Now that's just not fair."

Minho laughs sarcastically, face unreadable, something between anger and cockiness, something the younger had never seen before, "All's fair in love and baseball, Jisungie."

"Oh shut the fuck up with you're vague cliche bullshit, you know that's not what I was saying." Jisung can't express his anger, this whole thing was fucking insane. The complete 360 of the mood, the conversation, the man he knew.

Minho watches the steam practically pouring out of the boys red ears, fueling him maybe, "Then what _are_ you saying?"

Jisung feels his confidence diminishing, he feels the effects of Minho's biting, slowly breaking him down, "I—it just seems like you don't give a shit about anything that has happened between us all of a sudden, like you can just give up on me like that."

Minho has a look in his eye, whether it's sadness or guilt, he didn't look himself. He shrugs, "If that's what I must do."

Jisung feels his heart drop, like he can't move, his heart starting to beat out of his chest, and his breathing starting to become uncontrollable. He reaches for a breath to say something, yet nothing comes out, he _can’t_ breathe.

He suddenly feels like the room is closing in on him, with that _man_ in here with him, whoever the _fuck _he is, "I can't do this right now."

Jisung has to use the wall to find his way to the door, his vision was dotting, he was only distantly aware of the tears on his face, running viciously along with his dripping nose.

Minho can only watch from behind as he watches Jisung fall apart, "Wait—Jisung, hold on—"

Jisung's body is wracked with a sob, unable to breathe properly, feeling like he's in slow motion, "No, Minho! This all meant nothing to you."

He slowly turns around from facing the door, hatred on his face, "And you just proved that."

Jisung feels like a little bitch, like a little boy again. He hates that he can't control himself, his tears, his breathing, his fucking anxiety, and that he can't remain strong.

He wants to be strong.

Minho looks like he's about to walk over to the boy, concerned, like he fucking cares.

Jisung sobs again as he looks at his face, the one he thought he could fall in love with, the one he thought was the thing that he felt held a future beyond Spring Training.

"Don't fucking come near me, Minho."

Jisung pulls at his hair, feeling like a crazy person.

He just wanted to breathe.

"You know what, maybe I should have known you were just going to end up being a piece of trash man, someone who would have just left me, played me. Maybe I should have known when you played around with Hyunjin, when you objectified our senior, all the flirting, how fast this all happened."

Jisung's hands are trembling and he's so hot, his head is light.

"Maybe I was convincing myself that the reason it all happened so fast because it was _real_, that this was some kind of fate."

Another sob shakes through him, "You're just someone who's so uncomfortable with yourself that you have to project it onto others, and maybe if you got out of the closet for more than the few minutes you spend with me, you wouldn't be so fucking toxic."

"Jesus Christ I can't believe I thought you were different."

Jisung's head is hazy, the hyperventilating maybe.

He feels arms wrap around him from behind, Seungmin's voice maybe.

All Jisung remembers is the shock, the wide eyes, maybe a single tear, a still Minho.

Maybe it made him more sad.

—

Seungmin takes him away from the locker room, he's not sure where, all Jisung knows is he's on a couch, curled into his friend's chest pathetically.

Chest heaving, it sounds like he's underwater. His heart is beating so fast, he's scared, he's scared he might pass out, he's scared.

Seungmin strokes his back, trying to make him look at him, breathe with him.

Jisung can only remember when Minho did the same, how quickly he could talk him off the ledge.

Jisung sobs, almost yelling, trying to do something to let out all the emotions pressing at his temples and his chest, "I need Minho."

Jisung presses his head into his friends chest, eyes squeezed shut, "Fuck! That bitch doesn't even care," his breath hitches, "and here I am crying like a baby over him."

Seungmin rubs his arms and back comfortingly, repeating, "I know, I know."

—

good guy by julia jacklin

Jisung woke up in bed, head resting on a familiar shoulder.

He doesn't quite remember when he fell asleep, but he his comforted to feel Seungmin's fingers running through his hair and a movie softly playing in the background.

"Well good morning, sleepy head."Seungmin turns his attention away from the TV, soft smile on his face, "How'd you sleep?"

Jisung laughs sarcastically, a short pathetic thing, "Like a rock."

Seungmin laughs softly, brushing back his hair comfortingly, "Good."

Jisung begins to stretch, sitting up a bit, "What time is it?"

Seungmin furrows his brow as he checks his phone for the time, "It's 12:13."

Jisung's eyes widen, "Am or pm?" either way wasn't quite good, if it was pm he and Seungmin had slept through practice and if it was am his sleep schedule was entirely fucked up.

Seungmin giggles, "Am, you fell asleep as soon as I calmed you down, which was around like, 9pm."

Jisung feels relieved that he hadn't been asleep for too long, yet he still hated that Seungmin was up so late, "Minnie, you should go to sleep, I can't believe you stayed up for me."

His friend laughs, waving it off, "I just wanted to make sure you were okay," he pauses, sullen look on his face, "you were really shaken up last night."

A dark look grows on Jisung's face, recalling the night before, maybe he had blocked it out.

The boy grows quiet, picking at a string on the blanket while his head rises and falls with his friends breathing. The boy is still petting his head idly, face drawn in confliction, "Do you want to talk about it?"

Jisung takes in a sharp breath, he wasn't sure if he could. He looks over at Changbin's sleeping form in the other bed, silent and peaceful.

Seungmin hugs his friends head to his chest, "You don't have to if you don't want to."

Jisung shakes his head softly, leaning into the boys hand to imply he could continue to play with his hair, "No it's okay, I tell you everything, I have to tell someone or I'll go crazy."

Seungmin only nods, letting him take his time, to think.

Jisung takes a fortifying breath, looking up at the ceiling as he relaxes into Seungmin's shoulder some more, "He—well, one of the coaches, they said he had a good chance of getting offered a spot on the halos."

Seungmin is silent for a few moments processing that, "Oh.."

Jisung shakes his head, "Yeah, I know what your thinking, but it's not true." he pauses quieter this time, _"I was genuinely happy for him."_

"But it was as if he wouldn't even hesitate to completely disown me for a spot on the halos, like he didn't care at all."

"I think that's what hurt the most."

Seungmin nods, letting him continue, "I don't know, it was one big shit show, neither of us were listening to each other, and we were both hurting and then I was starting to panic and I _literally_ could not talk to him anymore or I'm sure I would have passed out."

"I just need someone to tell me that I'm not crazy, that I wasn't in the wrong. I can't help but feel dramatic for falling apart about something like this, it just, it _hurt_."

Seungmin pets his head, breathing calm, "You're not crazy, Jisungie."

Jisung pauses, looking at the window, the only thing semi lighting the room was moonlight peaking from behind the curtains, leaving a gray cast to the room.

Jisung furrows his eyebrows, deep in thought.

"Was it too much to ask?"

Seungmin runs his fingers through the boy's hair, shaking his head, "No, not at all. He wasn't even willing to try, he was in the wrong."

The boy can see him when he closes his eyes, the boy that he had first met, his princely hair and his boxy smile.

He sighs.

"I think I might have been fine with everything else if he hadn't been so cold, so polar opposite to every moment I had ever shared with him before."

Jisung laughs pathetically, "Maybe I was just being lied to the whole time."

Seungmin holds the boy tightly, shaking his head, "I don't think so."

Jisung turns his head to look up at the boy, "Really?"

Seungmin nods, "I think a lot happened, and I think there was a lot of misunderstanding, maybe the offer was going to his head, I'm not sure."

Jisung blinks up at his friend as he seems to come to a conclusion, "But I think he's a good guy, something about him tells me that this will pass, that it will be fine."

Jisung smiles at this, turning back around, soft smile stuck on his face.

"Maybe you're right."

Maybe it was because Jisung was tired, but he felt that it was time.

"Also your boy toy is a fucking coke addict."

Seungmin laughs curtly, "Yeah, I know."

—

"Jisung! Come here!"

Jeongin was cute, and that got him many places, but there was no way he was going to that batting cage.

Felix and Changbin were off in their own world leaning against the fence, flirting very obviously. Felix was biting his lip, looking at the shorter with a certain look in his eye. It seemed the boys leaned towards each other, like they were magnetically attracted.

Jeongin's eyes were lit up, cute smile calling him over.

Jisung would have went over to practice with them if not for the one man standing with them.

He looked forlorn, a sad look in his eye as he stared hopelessly at Jisung.

Minho looked tired, like he hadn't slept at all the night before, however Jisung couldn't bring himself to sympathize.

Jisung looked conflicted, maybe scared, his eyes were wide as he looked at the group in the other cage.

He opted for turning around and walking to the opposite end of the batting cages, as far away from him as possible.

Jisung had a habit that when he was upset about something, he would work himself to death. It wasn't very healthy, but it was as if he was punishing himself, pushing himself to the limits.

He also had a habit of running away from his problems.

The squirrelly boy clutches the athletic bag hanging on his shoulder tighter as he speed walks away. He heard the tread of someone running after him, but he refused to turn around.

If it was Minho, he wasn't sure he couldn't contain himself any longer, he might explode.

Jisung felt the hand on his shoulder and almost reactionary he flings himself around to knock off the hand.

As soon as he sees Jeongin's hurt expression he softens, he didn't mean to lash out on the sweet boy, "Oh, shit, Jeongin I'm so sorry."

The boy only shakes his head, soft smile returning, "It's fine Hyung." A look of concern grows on his face, "Are you okay?"

Jisung takes a sharp breath, everyone knew the effect of those words when everything was in fact _not _okay. However he holds himself together, giving the younger a small smile to assure him, "Yeah, I'm okay, Innie."

Jeongin seems to silently understand, "You want to practice with me?" He gestures you the empty cage theyre standing next to, "I promise not to annoy you too much."

Jisung smiles the biggest he has in a while, "You could never annoy me."

Jeongin smiles brightly, pushing into the cage, letting Jisung set up to bat.

"Thanks for not questioning anything, I'm just going through some stuff."

The younger smiles at him, waving it off, "Of course, I'm not gonna force you to tell me anything you don't want to."

He steps forward towards the older, more serious look on his face, "I'm always here to listen too."

Jisung smiles at the boy, ruffling his hair, "I know you are."

The older changes the subject quickly, not wanting to talk about Minho, "So, you thought anymore about your offer?"

Jeongin's smile falters for a second and Jisung almost regrets bringing it up, "I—well, not really."

Jisung furrows his brow, instantly feeling guilty, "Hey, I didn't mean to stress you out by bringing it up, it's a lot to think about."

The boy cringes hearing himself repeat those words.

Jeongin pouts against the older's shoulder, "No, no, you're right, I need to make a decision soon."

Jisung pulls away to put his hands on the younger's shoulders, looking him in the eyes seriously, "Just don't make a rushed decision just because you think you have to."

The boy smiles, nodding, "Don't worry about me, you worry about _him_."

Jisung thinks he may cry.

—

He was tired, that's for sure.

He had practiced all morning and barely had time to get lunch, then he was in the game, which true to their losing streak, they lost, though Jisung wasn't quite on his game either.

Truthfully, he couldn't bring himself to care, maybe he was being dramatic, but he couldn't help but not be in the mood for baseball.

He just wanted to sleep.

Jisung had made it up the elevator without seeing Minho at all, and he didn't room on the same floor as him, so the chances of seeing him were very slim.

He couldn't wait to sleep, groaning tiredly as he pushed into the room, almost leaning against the door.

All he had done was walk into his _own_ hotel room, yet here he was walking into something he wasn't supposed to.

"Oh Jesus!" Jisung is frozen in surprise as Felix climbs off of Changbin, clearly interrupting an intense moment.

Felix's lips were swollen, and both their chests were heavy, whether it was the shock of being walked in on or their previous activities.

The bed and their hair were both equally messy, but it appeared nothing too racy had happened yet.

Jisung snaps out of his frozen state,rubbing his eyes to hopefully rid himself of the sight, "Shit, I'm so sorry."

Jisung closes the door quickly, leaning against it as he breathes almost raggedly. He felt his anxiety flaring up from such an embarrassing moment. It's feels that every time he closes his eyes he sees it again, feels his cheeks heat up in embarrassment.

"Why can't anything fucking go right?"

Jisung stands there for a few moments contemplating what to do.

He couldn't quite go back in, and he couldn't stand outside all night.

The boy leaves the door, returning to the one spot that felt like home when his own room didn't.

Sauntering the halls, hand scraping the walls, he walked. The elevator ride down to the lobby was quiet, like the rest of the hotel, feeling empty.

When he reached the koi pond, he could help but admire its beauty. In a big hotel, in the middle of one of the biggest cities, here sat a koi pond, peaceful, _beautiful_.

Jisung passed the piano, hating the way it stared at him, reminding him of the way Minho smirked at him, his charming smile lighting up the dark hotel.

He took his usual seat in front of the pond, looking at himself in the reflection.

He laughs at himself, pitifully really.

He looks tired, his eye bags looked as if he hasn't slept in days, though he's gotten plenty. It feels like there's a cloud around his head, gray and looming, all the thinking he's been doing maybe.

He remembers Minho.

He remembers when he told him he was beautiful, when he was real.

At that moment it seemed like he had been telling him that this wouldn't happen.

Jisung hits his reflection, disturbing the pond, rippling out from him, no longer peaceful.

The tears come before he knows it.

"What the fuck are you even crying about, Jisung?"

He tugs at his hair, willing himself to stop, hating the pity and hatred he felt for himself.

It hurt.

He felt stupid.

But the weeks spent with Minho felt like months, therefore he would cry his eyes out.

The person he had trusted so quickly, could switch up on him just as quickly, and remind him that nothing happens just like that.

He punches the ground, he stands up, he paces.

Nothing can express his emotions except the tears running down his face.

The more he feels like a child, the more he hates it.

He makes his way to the elevator.

Though he was sure he didn't, he wanted to see him.

He was debating whether he should go up to his room or stay, maybe he was waiting for him.

At the same time thinking of what Minho did to him made him angry, but only because he couldn't stay mad.

Jisung was biting his lip nervously, standing idly next to the elevator.

"Jisung!"

He turns to his name, startled, he knew his eyes were swollen.

The older only gulps, he looked out of breath like he had been running, like he was distraught.

Jisung is cold, distant, like he doesn't know him, maybe he doesn't, "You okay?"

Minho lets out a heavy breath, like he was laughing, "Uh, no," he pauses, hands sitting on his hips, "I saw you and I realized I really wanted to tell you something," he shakes his head, "and I was worried you would get into an elevator before I got there."

Jisung looks to the elevator buttons, neither were lit up, he quickly scrambles to press the up arrow, not wanting to seem suspicious.

Jisung smiles softly, realizing something, though hating it, "I guess I was waiting for you."

Minho smiles before a serious look forms on his face, grim, "Jisung-ah," he takes a step closer, "I'm sorry."

Jisung's smile drops, chest aching a little bit, "Is that all you have to say?"

Minho shakes his head, hands in his pockets as he looks up from the ground, "No, not at all." he looks up to the ceiling for answers, "in fact I'm struggling to say everything I want to say right now."

Jisung scoffs, finding it almost humorous, he looks down at his shoes, sniffling lightly, "And that's supposed to console me or something?"

Minho shakes his head with a worried brow, "No," he looks at the floor, something Jisung isn't used to, "no, what I wanted to say was—."

The elevator dings, the younger snaps his head to the opening doors. He looks back at Minho's worried face, he was silently questioning the boy. Jisung thought that he was regretful, but he wasn't very good at expressing himself, and he wasn't going to forgive him so quickly as before.

Jisung walks into the elevator, turning around the watch the boy stand there, a war being fought in his mind.

It's almost that Minho's mind lags, he quickly runs into the elevator as the doors begin to close.

Jisung has hurt and confusion in his eyes, but he doesn't break his stare with the older, challenging him.

Minho takes a breath, "I was an asshole."

Jisung laughs at this, cold, "That's a fucking understatement."

Minho nods, face grim, "Yeah, I know."

"I don't really know what happened."

He rubs his face, Jisung realizes how tired he looks, "I don't know if it was the offer," his voice sounds shaky, _"or if I was scared."_

Jisung stands in the corner of elevator, arms crossed defensively. He could feel the tears coming, the strain on his face to hold them back, to be strong.

The boys chest heaves, he looks distraught, "I think in my mind, I knew if I took you into consideration, I wouldn't take it."

He looks at the ground, brow furrowed, like he's thinking as he talks, "You can't be something I think about," he looks to the ceiling trying to plan his words, "I—," he sniffs, finally looking the boy in the eyes again, "I knew I would stay for you."

Jisung looks at the boy, he's shaking, he looked small.

Human again.

Minho was slowly unravelling, "All I know was I was selfish and _mean_ and," he sniffles, seeming like he may cry, "and not myself."

Jisung feels a couple tears fall from his own eyes, it hurt to see the boy he cared for so deeply fall apart in front of him.

Minho's tears start to flow down his face, like he's been holding them for months, "I'm just so fucking _sorry_."

Jisung moves before he realizes it, arms falling to his sides as he takes a step forward. He wanted to give the boy a hug, he wanted to hold him, make him stop crying.

Minho hastily wipes his tears, hating how vulnerable he felt because of this one guy, as Jisung wraps his arms around him.

A sob wracks through his body, the older covers his face with his hands, feeling ashamed.

Jisung can't help but wipe his eyes with his thumbs quickly giving him a look that everything would be alright, before engulfing him in a hug again.

Jisung rocks the boy back and forth in his arms as tears fall gently from his own face.

Minho never stops the string of sorrys pouring out of his mouth.

Jisung tells him it's okay.

—

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's been two weeks, i know 
> 
> i've just been so stressed between school and dance these last few weeks that i had no time to update.
> 
> i truly want my work to be good, and to me it will always be quality over quantity (and school over fics lmao) i’ve seen the natural decline in quality of my chapters lately and it’s purely because i haven’t been able to put in the time that i want.
> 
> at some point updating became another one of my homework assignments which i just didn’t want.
> 
> so i took a break from updating until holiday break to let the chapters be the best they can be :)
> 
> thank you guys so much for understanding and thank you so much for waiting :)
> 
> love you guys :)
> 
> also hope you enjoyed it and thought it was worth the wait
> 
> but this ones kinda sad :(  
(things get fluffier next chapter don’t even worry)
> 
> feedback is always appreciated :) <3


	9. Chapter 9

"Do you have snacks?"

Jisung had only just walked into Minho's room, yet he seemed to feel right at home immediately.

Minho was still by the doorway, standing hesitantly as he closed it. He felt slightly awkward, he was sure his eyes were still swollen, and they hadn't talked for a day, but all of a sudden Jisung was acting like nothing had happened. When he found out his room was occupied, he was offering up his room before he even thought about it.

"Uh, no, not really."

Jisung pouts before plopping himself down on the older's bed.

Minho walks further into his room, putting his things down, frowning at the pouting boy, "Uh, but we could order some room service?"

Jisung gasp, eyes wide as he jumps up from the bed to run straight towards the older's arms. The younger wraps his arms around the older's neck, "You are a genius." he smiles at him lovingly, giving him a surprise kiss. Minho looks shocked as he wraps his arms around the smaller's waist, "Where did all this energy come from?"

Jisung studies the older's face, slight pout on his face, "I guess I missed you."

Minho laughs quietly, smiling brightly, "I missed you too, Casanova."

They stay like that for a few moments, silly smiles sitting on their faces.

Jisung breaks the stare by giving him another peck, "Can I borrow some clothes to sleep in?"

Minho giggles, patting his side to signal it was time to let go, "If you insist, freeloader."

Jisung gasps dramatically as he watches Minho walk to his dresser, "I am _not _a freeloader!"

Minho returns with some sweats and a hoodie in his arms, smirking playfully, "If the shoe fits." He puts the clothes in the boys arms, before kissing the side of his head, making his way to the phone to order some room service.

Jisung walks into the bathroom to change, leaving the door ajar so he could continue to talk to the older.

Minho stares at the menu hopelessly, never had he ever put in any effort to try to understand even a bit of English, "Uh, you know what you want?"

"What are my options?"

Minho studies the menu, eyebrows furrowed, "Uhh," he squints as if this will help, "I have no idea what the fuck this says."

Jisung snickers from inside the bathroom, returning to the room dressed to look over the older's shoulder as he wraps his arms around his waist, "Hmm," Jisung reads the menu slowly, unaware of the boy staring at him and his cute focused face.

"Just get two cheeseburgers."

He turns to look at the older's adoring face, "Don't look at me like that you might make me fall in love."

Jisung smirks as Minho's eyes search his face hopelessly. The younger gives him another sweet kiss, "You mind if I take a shower?"

Minho shakes his head, stupid smile on his face, "No, go ahead."

Jisung scowls at the boy, a look meant to be intimidating only coming out cute, "Don't you dare start eating without me."

Minho laughs, putting his hands up innocently, "I wouldn't dream of it."

—

Minho reaches over to the tray on his side of the bed to feed the younger a fry, while Jisung giggles as he scrolls through his phone crisscrossed on the bed.

Jisung graciously takes the fry, chewing with a smile still ever present on his face.

Suddenly the boy spots something on his phone, he gasps, looking over to Minho excitedly, "When is your birthday?"

Minho has a confused look on his face, but he can't help but he can't help but grin at how cute the younger is, "Uh, October 25, why?"

The older laughs at the boy as he giggles at his phone like a child, "What, Casanova??" He pokes his sides in an attempt to draw the information out of the younger.

Jisung giggles again looking between his phone and his man while he squirms from the tickling, "Lets see, Virgo and Scorpio sexual and intimacy compatibility."

Minho groans, rubbing his eyes as Jisung laughs loudly at the reaction, "What? This is useful information!"

Minho has his mouth open like he might say something, he looks conflicted. Jisung snickers, "You can't tell me you don't want to know."

He seems like he might protest, but instead he scoots up on the bed to rest his head on the younger's shoulder to look at his phone with him.

Jisung begins to read out loud, laughing through all his words, "This is a very interesting couple in the domain of sexual activity, one of them hiding their sexuality, and the other acting as sex itself." The younger gasps dramatically, "Minho! You Scorpio! Are you trying to take my sweet innocence?"

Minho blushes hard, hiding his face in the boys shoulder, "No! No I'm not!"

Jisung opens his mouth, beginning to act offended, "Oh so you wouldn't?"

Minho takes his face out of his shoulder to look at the boy's face, "I mean, consensually, hell yeah."

It's Jisung's turn to blush, screaming, "Ahh! You're such a Scorpio!"

Minho laughs as his facade breaks, bringing a finger up to the younger's lips, shushing him, "Shhh, we're going to get a noise complaint!"

Jisung giggles quieter, but he can't seem to stop his laughter, "I knew it, our sex life will be amazing."

Minho smiles as he brings a hand up to scroll through the rest of the page, "What does it say about romantic shit?"

"The best thing about their connection is in their ability to understand each other in silence, not ever wanting to let each other down."

Jisung pouts, cooing at the boy on his shoulder, "Aw, you understand me."

Minho laughs, faint blush still on his face as he shakes his head, laughing lightly, "Oh shut up, Casanova."

Jisung shakes his head, giggling, "Okay, okay last one," he scrolls a bit to the emotions section, "There is no other sign that can sense the needs of a Scorpio better than a Virgo, and no other sign that can dig up the emotions in a Virgo better than a Scorpio."

Minho grins, "Is it weird that this shit makes sense?"

Jisung shakes his head, smiling stupidly down at him, "No, not at all."

—

Minho hums as Jisung runs his hands through his hair again, his head laying in the younger's lap.

It was late, but neither were sure how late, all they knew was that as soon as they went to sleep, the night would be over, and their sleepover would be too.

Jisung looks down at Minho's fluffy hair lovingly. There wasn't anything particularly interesting happening, in fact they were sat in silence, but it was comfortable, nice.

Minho takes a breath, he looked conflicted, though Jisung couldn't see.

"I think the thing I regret the most about that night is that I knew how upset you would be, that you might be set into a panic attack, and I still said those things."

Jisung's soft smile disappears, they hadn't talked about it since they had arrived in the hotel room.

"And it hurt because, I _hate _seeing you like that. All I wanted to do was comfort you, and hold you until you stopped crying."

Jisung stays silent.

Minho sits up slowly, turning directly to face the boy. His face was grim, it was serious, but he speaks softly.

"You shouldn't have forgiven me so quickly."

Jisung's expression immediately contorts into one of confusion, "W—what?"

Minho shakes his head, he seemed to be containing himself in a bubble of composure, panicking underneath his calm demeanor, "What I said to you, it wasn't okay, Jisung."

Jisung wants to say something but Minho continues, "And—and, if you forgive me just like that now, you're always just going to."

Minho shakes his head, tears welling up in his eyes, "You don't deserve that."

Jisung feels tears in his own eyes, Minho was sweet when he wanted to be. The younger lifts a hand to caress the man's cheek, "God, Minho if I didn't think you deserved to be forgiven I wouldn't."

Minho looks like he will protest, but the look in Jisung's teary eyes tell him to stop, "I believe you are a good man, Minho."

Minho smiles softly, holding back his tears, "Jisung-ah.."

Jisung looks between the older's eyes, he looked so vulnerable, human, "I love you."

A tear falls down the older's cheek, from joy maybe, "God, I love you too."

Jisung bridges the gap between them, connecting their foreheads, they study each others faces, a fit of emotional outpouring, leaving them speechless. Yet so much is being said.

Minho smiles his cute little box smile, "Damn, Casanova, got me crying and shit."

Jisung laughs at the older's stupidity, not allowing him to ruin the moment any more than he already has by kissing him sweetly.

It's slow, but full of love, plenty of times it ends with a smile, they can't control how happy they are.

Jisung pulls away, goofy smile on his face and a glint in his eye, "Does this mean you'll finally ask me to be your boyfriend?"

Minho laughs, rolling his eyes at how cheesy this all was, wiping his eyes quickly, "Oh god, Casanova you know I'm not good with the romantic stuff."

Jisung giggles shaking his head cutely, "I know, but I just want to hear you say it."

Minho giggles along with him, squeezing his eyes in embarrassment, "Okay, Han Jisung," Jisung nods to encourage him, "Will you be, uh," he pauses out of embarrassment, "will you be my boyfriend?"

Jisung yells again, leaning back slightly and throwing his arms in the air. The older leaning forward with the boy to shush him, laughing brightly and enjoying how cute Jisung's wide eyes and smile look.

The younger cups Minho's face giving him a few pecks, "I thought you'd never ask!"

Minho laughs grabbing his hand to place several kisses on it, "Jesus, I love you so much."

Jisung giggles, mumbling cutely, "I love you too."

Jisung lets out a yell, pulling away to plop back onto the bed and shout to everyone, "I love Lee Minho!"

Minho, not generally one to join in on the boys crazy antics, decides it was very much worth it. He cups his mouth, cute smile on his face as he tilts his head back, "I love Han Jisung!"

Jisung's cheeks hurt from all the smiling he's doing, "God, I'll never get tired of that."

Minho leans back onto the bed frame, smiling up at the ceiling, "Me neither, Casanova, me neither."

—

"Hurry your ass up!"

Minho quickly picked up his dropped athletic bag, running into the locker room after his boyfriend, "If you had set an alarm, I wouldn't have had to hurry up!"

Jisung laughs loudly as he strips as fast as possible, they were going to be late, "If you would have let me go after you fell asleep, I could have set an alarm!"

Minho shoves his baseball uniform over his head, laughing, "It's not my fault you made me fall asleep."

Jisung puts on his baseball cap while Minho ties his shoes, "I can't help I'm a _wonderful_ little spoon." The younger begins to make his way to the exit to the field, Minho left behind, "Casanova, wait for me!"

Jisung laughs while he leans against the door, watching his boyfriend lovingly, "You're so slow!"

Minho finally runs over to the door, trapping him with a kiss, "As always."

Jisung can only stand shocked at the smirk settled on the older's face as he pushes the door open, "You Scorpio!"

Minho laughs brightly, beginning to sprint to the center of the field where the coach and the rest of the players were gathered, Jisung trailing behind.

When they arrived, the coach hardly looked up from his clip board, "Han, Lee Know."

The boys smile cheekily, chests still heaving from all the running they had been doing.

The coach isn't quite as amused, "Nice of you to join us."

Minho gives off a feeling that he's going to say something, chest puffing up, glint in his eye while a playful smile danced on his face. Jisung is scared of what he might say.

"Nice to be here, sir."

—

"You wanna get some lunch before the game?"

Minho was sitting on the bench tugging off his cleats while Jisung was using a rag to dry his sweaty head, "Nah, I think I'm gonna take a long shower and get a snack." Jisung was breathing heavily, obviously tired from a rough practice and his minimal amount of sleep the night before, "I really want to but I feel like a sweat monster right now."

Jisung pouts because he doesn't want to disappoint his boyfriend, "I'm sorry."

Minho laughs at the younger, "Jisung-ah, it's fine, I'm not going to have a conniption because you can't have lunch with me one day."

Jisung leans over close to the older, smiling cheekily, "But isn't that what boyf—"

Minho pokes the boys sides, surprised look on his face as he laughs at his boldness, "Shut up!"

They both look around to see if anyone heard, but the locker room wasn't too full, "You're paranoid, my dear Minho."

Minho giggles poking the boys leg again as he takes a drag of water, almost making him spit it out, "Rightfully so."

Jisung rolls his eyes as Minho makes his way behind him to whisper in his ear, "See you on the bus then?"

The younger giggles, "Wouldn't miss it."

Jisung begins to change as Seungmin approaches, "Yah, Han Jisung."

Jisung laughs at his friend trying to be serious, "Hello to you too, my dear friend."

"Why were you and Minho late?" He has his brow furrowed, but Jisung can't quite take him seriously.

"Look, this protective friend thing you're doing is cute, but nothing happened." Jisung pinches the boys cheeks which he shakes off quickly.

Seungmin looks at his friend suspiciously, "Except for the fact that you weren't talking to him yesterday."

Jisung shrugs as he folds his uniform into his bag, "Well now I am."

"Well what happened? Changbin said you didn't come back to your room last night."

Jisung snickers, zipping up his bag, "Felix didn't quite make it back to his apartment either."

Seungmin gasps, "Are you serious?"

Jisung nods, finally looking up at the boy, "Yeah, I walked in on them."

The boys eyes widen, "Oh? Yikes."

Jisung laughs, "Mm, that's what I said. Look nothing happened, we worked through it, we got room service, we talked, and we stayed in the same room, but _no _we did _not_ have sex."

Seungmin nods, eyes wide, "So everything's good? Is he not going to take the spot?"

Jisung shrugs, seeming unbothered, "I don't know, but I do know that whether he takes it or not, he's not going to give up on us."

He gets a dazed look on his face, stupid smile and all, "It was fun, he's fun, he's—" Jisung realizes something, "Oh! And uh," he gets a shy look on his face, blushing hard, "and we're together now, _officially_."

Seungmin gasps, "Oh shit, really?"

Jisung nods cutely, while Seungmin hugs him happily, "Ah! That's great!"

Jisung hits his friends arm, signaling for him to let him go, "Yes, but it's not something we're exactly broadcasting to the world, so keep your fat mouth shut."

Seungmin salutes playfully, "Yes, sir."

"Whatcha guys talking about?" Hyunjin slings his arms around both boys, looking between them smugly.

Jisung looks shocked, and frankly disgusted that he was even touching him, but he would let that go for his friend.

However Seungmin looked equally as bothered, rolling his eyes dramatically, "None of your business, _Hwang_."

Jisung almost wanted to laugh at the sheer immaturity radiating off of them, he instead he opts for shaking off the boys arm.

Hyunjin is clearly all up in Seungmin's face when he doesn't want him to be, "C'mon baby, don't be like that."

Seungmin melts at the name, clearly falling for whatever spell Hwang Hyunjin puts on people, "I can't tell you, I would if I could though."

Jisung always wants to vomit at Seungmin's little cute voice he uses around Hyunjin, "Anyways I'll be going now."

Hyunjin grabs Jisung's shoulder, panicked look on his face, "Wait!"

The two other boys stand frozen, Seungmin still under Hyunjin's arm while Jisung stood stuck under his tight grip, "Jisung, c—can I talk to you?"

Jisung almost wanted to laugh, it was hilarious. Here was Hwang Hyunjin, the epitome of arrogance, towering over him yet, asking him a favor. And he was so nervous to ask said favor he _stuttered_, a thing Jisung never thought he'd live to see, but here he was. If Hyunjin thought Jisung would easily forget this, he was terribly mistaken, because Jisung was going to relish this moment, and finally be the one to step on him for a change.

Jisung immediately stamps an arrogant look on his face, sticking his nose up at the request, "Why?" Simple and cold.

Hyunjin looks desperate, however he still insists on rolling his eyes.

Seungmin has his eyebrows drawn together, eyeing the two suspiciously, but still did not speak up.

Hyunjin huffs, bitter demeanor returning, "God, never mind."

Jisung tries not to laugh when he grumbles away.

—

Jisung bursts into his hotel room today, figuring that walking into a fuck fest proudly was the only way to do it, "Whaddup _Chang-bean?"_

Changbin looks thoroughly confused.

"Not butt fucking anyone in our room today, are you?"

Changbin stands up from his bed quickly, "Ah, Jisung, I'm so sorry."

Jisung pats the older on the back, "I'm just joking, Hyung."

He looks relieved, letting out a breathe, "Ah good, you have no idea how bad—"

Jisung has a smug smile on his face, as he pinches the mans cheek, "You do owe me though."

Changbin has a scowl on his face at the younger's boldness, however he restrains from saying anything.

Jisung searches through his drawer for some new clothes while Changbin looks over him, "So, are you and Felix official?"

Changbin's eyes widen considerably, shocked expression hanging on his face, "Uh, well,"

Jisung waves it off, "Ah, don't worry about it, I'll let you tell me when you're ready."

Changbin furrows his brows, watching the younger walk to the bathroom calmly, "No," Jisung turns around surprised, "he's my boyfriend."

"W-what?" Jisung's previously smug expression was nowhere to be seen, shocked by the sudden admission.

Changbin shrugs like it's not a big deal anymore, "Felix is my boyfriend."

Jisung laughs, "Hyung.." he covers his mouth giggling like a child. The older furrows his brow, getting defensive, "What?"

The boy is still laughing, he finds this hilarious, "You're such a hypocrite."

Changbin's eyes widen, "What? No I'm not!"

Jisung laughs harder at this, "As I recall you told me I shouldn't have a crush on Minho because that would be _mixing work with my personal life_, and here you are dating someone you work with."

He scowls, shaking his head, "No, that is just _not_ what I said. I said that he was on your rival team and _that’s_ why you couldn't have a crush on him."

Jisung smiles knowingly, "Oh I'm sorry, you're right, you said that about _you_, that _you_ couldn't mix work with your personal life, my bad."

Changbin's brow stays permanently furrowed, "But he's not even a baseball player!"

Jisung shrugs, satisfied smile on his face, "That's exactly what I said, but you insisted it couldn't happen."

Smoke seems to pour out of the mans ears, "I'm not arguing with you anymore about this."

The younger giggles as he walks into the bathroom, ready for his long awaited shower, "You just don't want to admit that I'm right, and you're wrong."

Changbin seems livid, only contributing to Jisung's amusement, "As if!"

—

It was a Monday, which was quite unspectacular, but more importantly, it was the second to last game of Spring Training.

Tuesday would be the last, and people who weren't playing in the official season, would leave Wednesday.

It was weird.

Jisung didn't quite want to think about it, or well, he really didn't want to think about leaving Minho. It seemed like they had forever yet, they were almost done.

Jisung turns around from where he stood leaning against the dugout fence. There sat a content Jeongin, a smile many had missed in the past days present on his face.

The older plops down onto the bench next to the excited boy, "Watcha doin, kid?"

Jeongin's face is lit up, like he's excited to tell him, "I'm playing a game where I guess what happened based on the reaction of the crowd," he looks over the fence, lined with boys blocking the view of the game, "I think I'm pretty good at this."

Jisung's mouth is wide open, he wants to ask why he doesn't just stand up and watch the game, however he's simply amazing by the boys brain that he can't even bring himself to question it, "So, according to your calculations, how's it looking?"

Jeongin furrows his brow, "Well, not good. I think the Dodgers have 2 runs and we have zero, and it's easy to figure out the inning based on when people leave and enter the dugout. We're in the 5th inning, with someone on first base, and," he pauses, thinking, "And two? strikes?" Jisung nods encouraging him, "Yeah, so not good."

Jisung thinks to himself, "And how many balls?"

Jeongin's brow furrows, "Hm, balls are hard."

Jisung laughs, patting the younger on the back, "How bout you _don’t_ say that again."

The younger catches what he said, laughing along with him, "Oh god, what are we twelve?"

He laughs, "I mean, pretty close."

The older pauses, searching the boys excited expression, he looked happy, "So, does this mean you're thought about you're future at all?"

Jeongin's face quickly turns away from the blocked field to look at Jisung's face sincerely, "I love baseball."

He shakes his head as he looks down at his fidgeting hands, "I mean I don't know what else I would do."

"Baseball has been my whole life, and yeah maybe that's inhibited me a little bit, I don't have all the experiences normal kids do, but I fucking love it. There's not anything I would rather do, so if this gets me there, then that's what I have to do."

His words make Jisung tear up, he's incredibly proud of him. The level of maturity Jeongin has gained since the beginning of Spring Training is immense and Jisung wouldn't expect any less.

Jeongin sees the older's welling eyes, pouting at him sadly, "Hyung.. don't cry."

Jisung brings the boy into a hug, because this would speak louder than any words he could think of.

—

"Where's Changbin?"

Jisung had just gotten out of the shower, still drying his hair with a towel as he walked out of the steamy bathroom, loose t-shirt and sweats hanging off of him, "He felt bad I had to relocate that one night because of him and Felix, so he gave me the room tonight."

He flings the towel in the bathroom to jump onto the bed next to the older, "But we all know he's just trying to act like a good Samaritan when in reality he's just gonna have a fuck fest in Felix's apartment."

Minho laughs loudly as he ruffles up Jisung's messy wet hair, kissing his forehead, "How honorable of Changbin."

Jisung turns in the boys arms to face him, smiling cutely, "Truly a hero." The younger leans in for a sweet kiss, stroking Minho's cheek with his thumb.

The older's pulls away, sneaking smile on his face, "I just feel bad for the extra bed, he'll go unused all night!"

"He probably needs a break from Changbin for a night anyways."

Minho gasps hitting the boys arms playfully, "You're so mean!"

Jisung laughs brightly as his boyfriend tickles his sides in punishment, "No! No, I'm sorry, It's all muscle!"

He stops finally, giving his another kiss, longer this time, passionate. Jisung sighs into the kiss, relaxing in his boyfriend's arms.

The younger blushes heavily while smiling embarrassedly when Minho pulls away, smug smile on his face, "You hungry?"

Minho gets up before he answers, lightly pushing the boy off him, "I'll get some room service."

Jisung follows him to the phone, wrapping his arms around his waist cheekily, "Look how domestic we are."

Minho laughs as he dials the front desk, "You would say that in any situation, Casanova."

"Let me dream, babe."

The older blushes at the name, something that didn't happen too often, "That's a new one."

Jisung whispers behind him as he starts to order, "You have a nickname for me, only fair I have one."

Minho accidentally laughs into the phone at this, continuing to order. He hangs up, turning around in the younger's arms, "That's just not original, Casanova."

Jisung looks up at him, smiling knowingly, "Yeah, but you and me both know you like it, babe."

He looks up at the ceiling, away from the younger, as he blushes a bright red, "You're the worst."

Jisung smiles, he knows he won, "That's just not true, you know you love me!"

Minho pauses smiling, he does know, he almost tells him, but suddenly there's a knock at the door.

"Ooh! Room service!" Jisung runs over the hotel door excitedly. Minho mumbles to himself, "That was fast."

Jisung jumps over dirty clothes on the floor, suddenly flinging to the door open.

"H-hyunjin?"

There stood a shy Hwang Hyunjin, a sight never seen before. He was messing with his fingers nervously, and his head seemed to ducked down in hesitation, "Hey, Jisung."

Jisung's previously excited smile had faded, leaving a furrowed brow and confused expression, "What are you doing here?"

"Uhm, well," he looks at the ceiling for answers, "I _really _need your advice."

Jisung looks behind his shoulder to see Minho looking out the door, expression equally as surprised. The boy steps outside his room closing the door behind him, "Is this about this afternoon, because if it is, I'm really sorry—"

Hyunjin shakes his head, arms crossed across his chest in insecurity, "No, no, nothing like that."

Jisung nods, still very confused, "Okay, then, what is it?"

He seems to stare at the ground before finally meeting the boys eyes, "I first just want to say I'm really sorry for the way I treated you before, you didn't deserve that, I was just being immature."

Jisung shakes his head, "No, that was partly my fault too, I was being just as childish."

Hyunjin laughs sarcastically, "You forgive people too easily. I made a lot of mistakes, I was an asshole."

Jisung laughs at the boy, "I just seem to be able to spot sincere apologies and good eggs."

The quiet boy laughs shyly, simply nodding in response.

Jisung shifts back and forth, wondering if the conversation was over, "Uh, was that it?"

Hyunjin looks up from the group, panic in his eyes, "No!"

The other stood shocked at the boys sudden outburst, eyes wide, "Uh, okay."

Hyunjin seems to be drawing the confidence to speak again, something Jisung had never seen before. It was crazy to see such an angry stubborn man, stutter and shake in front of him, like he was scared.

Hwang Hyujin was not one to be scared.

But he was human.

"I came because I—," he sighs, seeming to be beating himself up on the inside. Self frustration was bubbling up inside of him and soon it was going to explode, Jisung could tell.

"I want to surprise Seungmin because I haven't treated him the best the whole time we've been together, so I wanted to ask him out on a date but I realized I don't even know what he likes,but I want to do something special because for some reason I really fucking like him, he's cute and fun and he straightens me out and I realized that I can't imagine not having him in my life so please, god, please help me."

Jisung's eyes are wide, mouth open slightly in shock, the word vomit that just came out of Hyunjins mouth was _a lot _to take in.

He shakes his head, trying to catch his beating, "So whats you're saying, is that you want _me _to help _you _plan a date with Seungmin."

Hyunjin nods desperately, "Yes please."

Jisung laughs, it's hilarious. The begging boy scowls, upset that he was laughing at him so obviously.

The giggling boy takes a few seconds to control himself, still laughing slightly when he responds, "Yeah, okay."

Hyunjin doesn't even have time to get excited before Jisung speaks again, "But I have a few conditions."

He seemed willing enough, nodding enthusiastically, "Yes, of course, anything."

Jisung hums, "If I'm going to help you, you're not going to run away."

"What do you mean?"

He sighs, "I'm not going to let you vie for Seungmin's heart and run away at any sight of trouble."

"Secondly, no more drugs."

Hyunjin gasps, eyes wide, "W—what?"

Jisung has a dead serious look on his face, "I know about the cocaine."

The boy's eyes are blown open, he's stuttering, "D-did Seungmin tell you?"

"Does it matter?"

He stays silent.

"Do we have an agreement?"

"I mean, for Seungmin yeah."

—

"Why was Hyunjin here?" Minho immediately let the tired boy fall into his arms, Jisung's head resting on his shoulder heavily.

His voice is muffled into the older's shoulder, but Minho listens to the mumbling boy, "Why do I always get stuck with all the hard jobs?"

—

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guys, we're almost done!
> 
> i 95% sure next chapter will be the last one, which makes my ocd quite happy that we're ending on 10.
> 
> however don't worry! there will be a quite lengthy prologue where we see how they're doing in the future.
> 
> i love that shit
> 
> anyway thank you guys so much for being patient with me throughout this fic.
> 
> (also i have a fic in mind to write next, and it will be nothing like i've ever written before, so look out for that!)
> 
> love you guys <33
> 
> one last thing, hope you had happy holidays and have a happy new year guys :))


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi guys :)
> 
> i feel bad that i skipped last weeks update however i think this time i had a valid reason
> 
> so i was in a car crash last saturday 
> 
> no one was hurt, i’m fine, my car wasn’t, but it wasn’t my fault so insurance thankfully paid for it.
> 
> i’m not telling you this for you to worry i just figured i should explain my absence
> 
> anyways i hope you guys enjoy the last chapter :]

Changbin was not one to be chirpy, but this morning he was particularly quiet, almost as if he was carefully stepping around what he wanted to say. It bothered Jisung, he didn't like the silence, and he didn't like the anticipation, however no matter how far their relationship had come over the weeks, he was not comfortable enough to get it out of him yet.

Jisung instead let it be, getting ready for practice like it was a normal day.

However was not.

Not only was Changbin being entirely weird, but Jisung could not for the life of him wrap his head around the fact that today held the last practice, the last bus ride, the last game of his time spent in LA.

He didn't want to leave and he didn't want to think.

He wanted to play baseball, so that's what he would do.

Jisung was sitting on the end of his bed, tying his shoes quietly, as if to not disturb the peace.

Both boys both agreed on keeping the lights off so early in the morning, the only thing lighting up the room was the slight dark blue light of the morning sky coming in through the window.

Changbin was approaching, and Jisung could feel the relief coming at the thought that he might finally get whatever was bothering him so much off his chest.

"I think I messed up."

Jisung's face scrunches up in confusion, "What do you mean?" He was scared of what this might mean, however he was preparing himself for the worst.

Changbin sighs, plopping onto the bed next to the younger, "Well, my intentions were good."

"Aren't they always?"

The older flicks the boys forehead, "You are not helping."

Jisung shakes his head, "C'mon spit it out, you can't stall forever, old man."

Changbin scowls however he lets it go, solemn look still on his face, "I'm not leaving on Wednesday."

At first Jisung laughs, "What do you mean, man?"

"I mean, I'm on the team."

At first it didn't quite register, it was early in the morning, Jisung did a double take.

"Wait, what?" Jisung immediately looks up from his shoes to pat the older on the back, "Holy shit, that's incredible, congratulations."

Changbin has a shy smile on his face, "Thanks man."

Jisung's smile falls off his face, he didn't think Changbin would be the type to have the same reservations about taking the position as Jeongin, but for some reason he was sulking, that scared him, "So...what's the problem?"

"Uh," he fiddles with his hands, "I haven't told Felix yet."

It definitely wasn't what he was expecting, however if he was going to break up with Felix for no reason they were going to have problems, "Why is that?"

The man lets go, sighing deeply, suddenly turning into a shy child, "I wanted to surprise him."

Jisung is overcome with a wave of relief, "Oh my god, Changbin, you scared me, I thought you were going to break up with him." He almost wants to hit him, but he refrains, figuring he valued his life.

Changbin buries his face in his hands, voice muffled, "He's been so sad and sulky! He thinks I'm leaving tomorrow and it has been killing me not to tell him." He looks up at the ceiling exasperated, "Now I'm starting to think I should have just told him from the beginning."

Jisung laughs at the stressed man sitting beside him, hand rubbing his back in comfort, "Dude, calm down! It's too late for you to start regretting things now."

Changbin groans, looking at the younger unimpressed, "What fantastic advice you have given me, Jisung."

Jisung sighs, rolling his eyes, "Look, I'm sure he'll love the surprise."

The older gives him a look, "Are you sure about that? Because as I recall you aren't the one who's had to watch him mope around for the past couple days."

He huffs, rubbing his eyes tiredly as Jisung starts to speak again, "You just have to make sure your actions seem intentional."

Changbin raises his head up out of his hands, he looks lost, "How do I do that?"

Jisung sighs, "Just make sure he knows that you waiting was for _him_, make him feel special!"

The older still sits perplexed, brows drawn together, there's a knock at the door, the boys figured it was Woojin, "How do I do that?"

Jisung gets up to answer the door, walking backwards to talk to Changbin, "I don't know figure it out."

The younger reaches the door, leaning on it as his facial expression softens, "Hyung, you know him better than you lead yourself to believe, you'll get it."

Changbin smiles softly from the bed, it's silent for a few moments.

"Thanks, Jisung."

He simply nods opening the door to reveal a certain Hwang Hyunjin, standing just the same as the previous night.

"Where have a seen this picture before?"

—

"Okay, listen to me Hyunjin," Jisung had his arm wrapped around the boys shoulder as they walked to the locker room, explaining his instructions very carefully, "ask Seungmin if he would like to ride back to the hotel together, because _you have been sweet to him all day_, he will of course say yes."

Hyunjin nods attentively, "Okay so we go to the hotel together, are you saying we should—"

"No, any of the things you are thinking of right now, you will not be doing." Hyunjin opens his mouth to protest, but quickly closes it at the look on Jisung's face, "You will take his hands right there in front of the hotel, you won't care who is there, and you will ask him on a date."

Hyunjin nods enthusiastically, "Okay, okay, I can do that."

Jisung nods back, moving away from the boy to enter the locker room separately.

"Wait, that's not enough details."

Jisung rolls his eyes, turning back around, of course Hyunjin would need a step by step guide, "Look Hyunjin, it's not that hard, let him go up to his room to freshen up, and tell him to meet you back in the lobby."

Hyunjin nods attentively, beginning to enter the locker room, "Are you sure I can do this?”

Jisung stops the boy, placing his hands on his shoulders and looking straight into Hyunjins eyes, "No one knows Seungmin better than you. You are convinced that this will be too hard, but I think you will find that it will come easily."

Hyunjin smiles softly, "Thank you, Jisung, really, thank you for all that you've done for me in the last couple days."

He pats the boy on the shoulder, smiling back, "Thank me when it's over."

Hyunjin laughs, nodding, "Yes, Captain."

The boys finally enter the room laughing quietly.

Jisung smiles at the way Seungmin tries to hide his obvious jealousy, eyeing them in hopes they would approach him instead of leaving him out. Hyunjin looking over at the same boy, love sick look in his eyes.

Jisung rolls his eyes, pushing him over to Seungmin, "Go get him tiger."

—

Coach had a satisfied smile on his face, watching as his team gathered up in front of him. He seemed proud.

Yes, the team wasn't the best of all time, he did grow to love them.

It was quite bitter sweet.

Jisung stood close to Minho, leaning towards him naturally, his hand wanting to reach out a grab the older's, however he restrains himself, settling with the thought. Jeongin stands on his other side whispering quietly to Kevin, giggling every once in a while.

"Good morning, everyone, did you sleep well?"

Minho leans over the Jisung, smile dancing on his face, "I've been here a month and I still have no idea what the fuck he's saying."

Jisung stares back lovingly at the older's face, laughing quietly, "I wouldn't expect any less."

Minho places a hand on the younger's shoulder to shake his slightly in retaliation, attention returning to the coach.

Coach sighs, arms behind his back, "I'm proud of you guys, and, and yeah I know I'm getting a bit mushy with you guys, but I truly, I truly think you'll all go places."

"You all have a role to play in the future of baseball, and I really believe that."

"We started out strong and played our best till the end, no matter how many we've lost, we did play a good game."

"So on that note, let's get to practice, and play one damn good game tonight."

—

The heat was searing and you could tell it was starting to near summer. The summers in Korea could not even compare to the ones in California, Jisung was practically dying in the heat of the afternoon sun.

The team was waiting for their bus, which hadn't arrived yet, a crowd of baseball players sweating through their shirts on the tarmac. People were starting to get restless, fanning themselves and dropping their bags onto the ground lazily. No one dared to ask the frazzled coach if they could go inside, he had been on the phone yelling tirelessly, demanding a reason for the tardiness of the buses.

They're game was in about 3 hours, with a two hour drive to the stadium and enough time to warm up, leaving at 3pm seemed like a perfect idea. However if the buses didn't show up soon to game would have to be delayed, and his team would have no time to warm up.

Jisung picked his baseball cap up off of his head, wiping the sweat off his forehead. His tight baseball pants were starting to get uncomfortable, he shifts back and forth.

Jeongin sighs loudly, fanning himself dramatically as if to draw the coach's attention. The coach however was turned away, yelling just as loudly into his phone.

Jisung finds himself not caring who was looking, and dropping his head tiredly onto Minho's shoulder, watching the heat waves rise up from the pavement. Jisung glared at them, as if to scare them away, however they persisted, wiggling up from the ground just the same as ever.

Minho looks down at the boys head concerned, brows furrowed. He lifts a hand to pet the little hairs on the back of Jisung's neck, wet with sweat. He finally huffs, starting to take a few steps towards the coach, leaving Jisung's head to fall.

Jisung quickly grabs the older's wrist, wide eyes, "Where are you going?"

Minho looks angry, which Jisung did not like the look of, "I'm going to go ask coach why the hell we aren't going inside." He attempts to walk away again but Jisung tugs him back, "Why?"

The older turns back around, expression softening, "You're going to pass out if you don't cool down soon."

Jisung chuckles softly, pulling him back one more time, this time close enough to where he won't let him leave again, "Minho, I'm not going to pass out."

Minho still seems unsure, shifting back and forth on his feet. Jisung still has a grip on the older's wrist, making sure he wouldn't bolt as soon as his guard was down, "Do you even know what you're going to say?" Minho opens his mouth quickly, about to speak when Jisung cuts him off, "In _English_?"

Minho closes his mouth, scowl on his face, "Yes in fact, I do."

Jisung laughs brightly, nodding, "Okay tell me."

He draws in a fortifying breath, cute accent coming out, "Why we no go in building?"

Jisung giggles at the boy's broken English, drawing him in for a hug and quietly whispering, "You're so cute."

Minho mumbles, "No I am not."

There's a gasp, a cheer, the whole team starts to talk loudly as the bus starts to approach.

Minho has a small smile on his face, laugh slightly as he watches the bus, "I can't wait until I can kiss you in front of whoever the fuck I want."

—

"Yah, Han Jisung, pay attention unless you want a baseball to the face."

The team was warming up, Jisung was pitching back and forth with Changbin, however Minho would not stop making faces at him from where he stood talking to Hyunjin. Whether it was a wink or a stupid face, he never failed to make Jisung blush and laugh.

Changbin was getting fed up however, because every time he looked away the flow was messed up, as much as he wanted to, he refused to throw the ball at Jisung without him ready to catch it, so he waited.

"Sorry, Hyung, blame Minho."

Changbin shakes his head, moving away from his spot to get some water, clearly done with warming up with Jisung for today, "You two are disgusting."

Jisung follows, the older to the chatting pair, whining, "Don't act like you and—" Changbin cuts him off, "Don't finish that sentence."

The younger rolls his eyes, being bratty, "No one even understands what the fuck we're saying, Changbin."

He raises his eyebrows in response, "Oh so we're cursing now?" He takes a sip from his water bottle, Jisung winding up for a comeback until Minho walks up to place a hand on each of their shoulders, "Okay, that's enough, you guys won't even be friends anymore by the end of this at this rate."

"Minho, he's being over dramatic." Jisung whines to his boyfriend, hoping he'll take his side.

Changbin raises his eyes brows, not believing the things coming out the boys mouth, "And you're not respecting my privacy!"

Minho rolls his eyes, sarcastically looking both of them in the eyes, "And you're both being childish, so you can both get over yourselves."

Jisung spots the coach approaching the warm up area first, quickly straightening up and facing him as everyone else does, ready to listen as he reads off his clipboard, "Okay I need Jeongin on the mound," Jisung had already gotten over the fact that the coach new Jeongin by name instead of by his baseball name and no one else, "Andrew on first, Lee Know on second," the coach pauses, he thinks something over, "Mark, you're on right field, Hyunjin center," Jisung was shocked, the coach always has an order to things, and announcing positions was no different, short stop was always after third base, he skipped short stop.

Jisung was a short stop.

"Reid you're on left field and," he trails off again, he glares at his clip board, turning something over in his head very carefully. He sighs, he seems hesitant but he seems to gather his confidence in this person, "Han, you're short stop."

Minho cant even try to hide his huge smile, maybe he seemed more excited than Jisung. He grabs onto the younger's shoulder, shaking him slightly, silently giving him a congratulations.

The shocked smile on Jisung's face stays as he looks at the coach's reassuring eyes, "I'm trusting you, Jisung, don't screw this up."

As he begins to walk away, the boy stands frozen, even as Minho did everything he could to tell him how proud he was other than grab him by the face and kiss him, he stood shocked.

He knew his name.

—

Jisung loved the way Minho looked when he played baseball, and he considered it a blessing to stand so close to him instead of looking on from the dugout. Of course he also used this as an excuse to ignore the excitement feeling in his stomach stemming from actually getting to play a game.

He loved the way Minho adjusted his cap and the way he dug his cleats into the dirt, but most of all he loved the way he scrunches up his nose when he's trying to focus. It's like he’s to blind to see home base, like he has to squint to see it, maybe he needs glasses, or maybe he's just a creature of habit.

Either way, it's one of those things that proves to Jisung just how much he loves him.

And it always gives him a good laugh.

The game was a tight one, the crowd was just as invested as the players, eyes following every little movement. It was the end of the ninth inning, the last inning, however both teams were tied.

There was almost a certainty they would be sent into extra innings, however the home team had someone on third, ready to run to home base.

The home team had 3 outs, and the LA Angels were hoping they could strike them out before they made a run and won the game.

Jisung was nervous, he wanted the game to be over, however he refused to let the other team win.

His last game would not be a loss.

The next guy came up to bat, and Jisung could feel himself starting to sweat. He hears the man through the speaker announcing Adrian Baker up to bat, long drawling sound on the ears. The night had cooled the air considerably but between the stadium light beating down on and Jisung's anxiety he felt himself starting to deteriorate.

His eyes dart between Jeongin on the mound and the batter on home, he would not let himself ruin this game.

Jeongin starts to wind up as soon as the batter gets into position, throwing a killer curve ball.

Adrian swings and misses, the umpire catching it and calling out a strike. Jisung found himself failing to remember the umpire's name.

Jisung looks over to his right, drawing confidence from Minho, he figured if the short stop got to stand so close to Minho, he picked the right position.

The boy takes in a deep breath.

The tension in the air was suffocating, absolutely dreadful. A lot was riding on this one batter.

Jeongin throws another pitch straight to home, he misses again.

Jisung notices how much he tenses when the ball is thrown, only relaxing when it's safely in the umpire's glove.

If this guy had one more strike, the game would be sent into extra innings automatically, and Jisung would be safe to go to the dugout, but if he hits it, the defense would be the ones in trouble.

And god forbid he hits a home run.

Jeongin digs his cleats into the dirt of the pitchers mound, giving himself a stable footing. The batter hits his bat against the ground twice for good luck before finally getting into position.

Jeongin takes a look at the man on third base, leaning towards home, ready to run. He winds up, picking up his front leg for momentum, delivering a fast ball straight to Adrian.

Minho saw the speed of the ball, beginning to back up in case he had to catch it, leaving Jisung to be his back up.

The crack of the ball on a bat was something that Jisung was used to, it was what he heard every day, however this one seemed to be deafening. He could only hear his heartbeat, pounding in his chest as time seemed to slow down.

The ball was traveling slightly to the right of second base, Minho was expecting too much from Adrian, expecting a harder hit, unprepared to have to return to second.

Jisung knew he couldn't let the ball fall to the ground, he knew he wouldn't let it end that way. He refused to look but he knew Adrian was sprinting to first and the man on third was running to home, he was going to get a run.

Jisung was sprinting, the ball was so close to the ground, all he knew was that he had to catch it, and they would have three strikes.

Three strikes you're out.

He lunges.

Dives really, sliding on the ground arm outstretched, to slide his glove under and catch.

He caught the ball.

Before he knew it everything seemed too fast again like he might pass out.

He chucks the ball to first, not even rising enough to stand from his knees, watching as his teammate on first catches it.

Striking Adrian out within milliseconds of reaching first base.

Jisung hadn't won the game, but, he didn't make them lose, and that's all that mattered.

—

Jisung was sure Minho wouldn't leave him alone, from the moment they reached the dugout he couldn't restrain himself from hugging him and patting his back, whispering to him how proud he was. Anything that could pass for platonic if you didn't look too hard.

Jisung couldn't help the huge smile that was plastered on his face, as Minho rubbed his back congratulating him silently.

They were sat on the bench as the younger took a big sip of water, resting his head on the older's shoulder telling him silent thank yous.

The coach walks into the dugout.

It was the end of the 11th inning and the Angels were batting, so the infield and outfield players were resting.

Everything was a blur to Jisung, but he thought Changbin was batting.

"Minho," said boy looked up at his coach surprised, eyes wide, "I want you to bat next."

Minho blinked, he almost thought he misunderstood him, a miscommunication via the language barrier. However these were words he had heard many times before throughout his stay in LA, he did not easily misunderstand them.

It was not unheard of for him to bat, however the bases were loaded, meaning three potential runs were resting on his shoulders, this was not an easy position to be in.

As soon as Changbin made it to first, Minho felt the pit in his stomach start to grow, he felt nervous in a way he had never before.

Jisung silently watched his boyfriends face twist with fear, hating the way he was so helpless.

Minho started to stand up, straightening out his uniform. At first Jisung was sure the only thing he could do was watch after him and pray he does well, until he realized that's what friends do, not what boyfriends do.

Jisung catches the older's wrist, bringing him into a hug. He hoped the other players didn't find it weird, however if they did Jisung figured he wouldn't ever have to see them again after tonight, he was okay with that.

Minho seemed to need the hug, squeezing the younger’s waist with an intensity that told him all the words he wanted to say.

Jisung settled with saying the thing that seemed to make the most sense.

"You'll do great, I love you."

Minho nods, "I love you too."

Separating quickly, and grabbing a bat on his way out of the dugout. Jisung finds a place at the fence, there was no way he wasn't watching him.

Felix comes up behind, standing beside him quietly. He senses the nervous energy surrounding him, so he grabs his hand sitting on the fence.

"He's going win this for us."

"I know he will," Jisung breathes deep, "I just need _him _to believe that he will."

Minho walked up to the plate, anyone who knew him could tell purely from his demeanor that he was freaking out inside.

Felix squeezes his friends hand in reassurance, suddenly straightening up, "You can do this, Minho Hyung!"

Jisung was jolted by the sudden yell, but he looked to see the small smile on Minho's face, he realizes a little embarrassing is exactly what he needed, "You got this Minho!"

The yelling spread to Jeongin and Changbin, eventually the crowd roaring along with them, however Minho couldn't take his eyes off of his beloved boyfriend, smiling loving back.

Jisung sends him a small heart before Minho gets into position, smile still evident on his face, no trace of nervousness left.

The only thing Jisung could wish for was for Minho to do well, and as soon as the pitch was thrown, he felt himself tense in the same way he did when he himself was on the line.

He held his breath.

The crack of the bat was overwhelmingly loud to Jisung once again.

It was amazing.

Unbelievable.

Jisung was jumping up and down as soon as he saw where the ball was going, Felix jumping up and down with him.

He hit a home run.

That was the end, all three bases ran through home and straight to Minho, hugging him tightly.

Jisung was the first person to run out of the dugout, Minho's arms waiting patiently to take him in. The hug was warm and loving, and full of so much happiness, Jisung felt like crying.

The rest of the team followed, bringing out the huge cooler of Gatorade, pouring it out straight onto the couple.

Minho only held on tighter, the team could pat him on the back, they could cheer, they could pour gallons of Gatorade on him, but the only thing he wanted to do, was hold Han Jisung in his arms.

—

"You should have seen him Chan! He was fucking insane!"

Chan laughed as he drove, eating up the story.

"He was so nervous, but as soon as he heard his team cheering for him he cracked out a home run that went straight out of the park!"

Minho blushes profusely, sitting in the middle seat between his boyfriend and Jeongin, "He's over exaggerating."

Jisung pokes the boy's sides, "He's lying! You had to be there, he's completely underselling himself!"

Jeongin bounces on the other side of the car, "Woojin Hyung, did you see?"

Woojin laughs happily, the bright energy I the cat infectious, "Yes, I saw."

Jeongin has this excited look on his face, one only a person so young can have, "Wasn't it amazing?"

Woojin giggles, nodding, "It was pretty amazing."

Chan squeezes Woojin's hand, looking at him sweetly, "I believe you."

The ride to the hotel was full of laughter and joy, and suddenly it didn’t seem like their last night was so bad.

As soon as Chan put the van in park the boys were bounding our the doors, yelling and laughing loudly. Minho slung an arm around Jisung’s shoulders, leaning his head on the younger’s.

Chan and Woojin trailing along behind, Jeongin bounding in before everyone else.

The lobby was still lit up with a warm glow, from the big lights lining the walls, people from the game and other teammates flooding in.

Woojin stood in front of his team again, counting heads as he always does, except he somehow ended up with only one of his players and two others from their rival team.

Usually this is the point where he would search for them endlessly until he ensured they were safe in their rooms however, he was a bit more lenient tonight. Woojin places a big hand on Jisung’s head, paternal energy radiating out when he ruffles the younger’s hair, “Do we know where the other two are?”

Jisung giggles, shaking off the older’s hand, “Seungmin is on a date and my bets are on Changbin being at Felix’s apartment.”

Woojin sighs, he figured he could give up being a manager for one day, “Okay, as long as they’re here in the morning.”

Jisung nods, “I’m sure they know, you can relax for one night you know.”

Woojin laughs, “I know, I know.” He steals a glance at Chan, placing an arm around him, smiling sweetly. He returns his attention to his only player, “I will see you bright and early in the morning, don’t be late.”

Chan pulls the oldest’s arm, attempting to get him out of the hotel and away from manager mode. Woojin still turns his head over his shoulder as his boyfriend drags him, “6 am, Han Jisung! Don’t forget to set an alarm!”

Minho giggles lightly by Jisung’s side, squeezing him closer to his side. He looks around sneakily, checking to see if the lobby was clear. He steals a kiss from the younger quickly, prompting him to playfully hit him, “What are you doing, you’re crazy!”

Minho grabs the younger’s hips, while the younger places his arms around his neck, “The heart wants what it want.” Jisung looks over the older’s shoulders nervously, checking again to see if the lobby was empty, “What if someone sees?”

A smile grows on Minho’s face, a hand coming to stroke the younger’s cheek, “We’re in America, home of the free, Casanova, we can kiss whoever the fuck we want.”

Jisung takes the opportunity to kiss him.

—

“Can I ask you a question?”

Minho nods, running his hands through the boys hair.

“Where do you see yourself in five years?”

Jisung traces small pattens on Minho’s bare chest, cuddling up on his shoulder some more. Minho takes in a breath, thinking, “Probably playing baseball, on the verge of retiring, starting to make a family, maybe adopt some kids.”

Jisung giggles quietly, “I never took you for someone who wanted kids.”

Minho looks the boy in the eyes, searching his boyfriend’s face lovingly, “Never judge a book by its cover.”

He steals a kiss, a sweet one, theough it never seems to end.

“What about you, Casanova?”

Jisung hums, closing his eyes Minho gently strokes his hair, “I think after I retire, I want to coach little league,” he smiles sweetly up at his boyfriend, “maybe get married.”

The older giggles, “And what a pretty little bride you will be.”

Jisung tries to act tough, hitting the man’s chest though not doing much damage, “Who says I’m going to be the bride?”

Minho bumps their noses together, smug smile plastered on his face, “Say you in this bed 30 minutes ago!”

Jisung gasps dramatically, “That does not mean anything, you stereotype follower! We’re both wearing the pants in this relationship!”

A humorous glint in the older’s eyes shines brightly, “But what if I want to wear a skirt!”

Jisung picks up the extra pillow hitting Minho in the head, “Oh so you’re a comedian now!”

Minho picks up the other pillow starting to hit the younger with it mercilessly.

“Wait, wait, wait!” Jisung scurries our of bed, quickly picking up his underwear to slip on.

He turns around, big smile on his face, “Okay, now I’m ready!”

Minho tilts his head at his boyfriends cute little quirks, smiling as he lets out a sarcastic drawl, “Oh how modest of you.”

—

The sunlight started to tickle, Jisung’s face, waking him up, slowly. The bed felt cold, like he was the only one in it, however he can’t bring himself to move. He finds himself half asleep and half awake.

The alarm came easily though he’s not sure how much later it went off he was finally fully awake.

Jisung woke up to an empty bed, the first thought was that Minho was ashamed of what they had done last night, however he knew that was not very like him.

Jisung’s clothes were strewn across the floor but Minho’s were gone. It was like he dreamt it.

Like it didn’t happen.

The second thought was that Minho was on the team, that he had gone to practice.

Jisung didn’t really want to think like that, however he never really got a straight answer.

The sun pouring in through the windows seemed out of place on such a bitter sweet day. Jisung’s emotions were stuck between resentment and happiness. He wanted the best for his boyfriend yet he hated, no loathed the thought of being so far away from him.

He hated it.

Jisung crawls out of bed, eyeing his packed suitcase, he only had a few things left to pack. The clothes on the floor reminded him Minho wasn’t there. It reminded him of the time zones and the long flights and the lengths he’d have to go to see him.

He snatched the clothes off the ground, projecting his anger onto the innocent T-shirt he grasped. Jisung slipped on some clothes, some fit for such a long flight.

Changbin entered not long after, small smile on his face disappearing after he sees the steady eyes Jisung, standing pathetically in the middle of the hotel room, shivering slightly.

The older immediately brings the boy into his arms, hugging him tightly.

He lets him cry.

—

Jisung walked slowly, approaching the lobby, packed _full_ of other baseball players meeting with their managers, taking up spaces on the numerous lobby couches and forming groups of suitcases and people as they gather together.

It was a mess.

Changbin led him down, though he wasn’t leaving, he couldn’t bear to let his team leave without saying goodbye.

The first person he spotted was Woojin, he stuck out like a sore thumb as he frantically looked through the crowd of boys.

When the manager spots him he looks like he might kill him, however as he approaches his expression softens as he spots his swollen eyes, “Oh my god, Jisung are you okay?” The older’s pulls him in for a hug, which is a sure fire way to get someone to start crying again. Jisung stays strong.

“I’m fine, Hyung, just,” he breathes in slowly, “just struggling to say goodbye,” he huffs, “if I even get a goodbye.”

Woojin’s brow furrows, pulling away to place both his hands on the younger’s shoulders, “Have you not seen him at all this morning?”

Jisung sighs, putting on a fake smile, “I still have other people I have to say goodbye to.”

Woojin nods, letting him travel the crowd of baseball boys.

The boy spots Jeongin first, standing next to Hyunjin and his manager. The youngest almost runs to him, engulfing him into a bone crushing hug, “I’m going to miss seeing you everyday.”

Jisung laughs, nodding into his friends shoulder, “Me too, Innie.”

The older pulls away to look the boy in the eyes, “Just promise me we’ll stay in touch.”

He laughs in response, “You won’t be able to get rid of me when I come back to visit Seoul.”

Jisung nods, laughing, “Doesn’t sound like a bad thing.” He turns his attention to Hyunjin, he was looking down as if he wasn’t sure what to say, “Yah, you can at least say goodbye to me.”

Hyunjin scowls, at him in response, “We’re going to the same city, maybe even on the same flight.”

Jisung looks unimpressed, making the other roll his eyes, “Okay fine, I’ll see you whenever I guess.” He figured they would always have a love-hate relationship.

Seungmin suddenly shows up from behind Hyunjin, smiling at his friend and giving him a greeting hug, “Hey Jisungie.”

Seungmin suddenly gasps in realization as he sees Changbin approaching, “I can’t believe you’re leaving us!” He draws the older in for a tight hug, Felix showing up behind him.

Felix is surprised when the same boy engulfs him in an equally tight hug. They were never particularly close, however neither were ones to turn down a hug, “Take good care of Changbin, god knows he needs it.”

The Australian laughs brightly in response, “Ay-ay captain.”

Jisung juts his lip out as he outstretches his arms for Felix to give him a huge hug, “I’m gonna miss you so much.”

Felix scowls over his friends shoulder, “No, _I’m _going to miss _you_ so much.”

Jisung shakes his head violently, “But I’m going to miss you more—“ Changbin separates the two, “Okay, this is getting old fast.”

The squirrelly boy sticks his tongue out at the older, “You’re just jealous.”

Changbin opens his mouth to say something but Jisung is already talking to Felix again, “Don’t forget to call me!”

Jisung finally turns to Changbin.

As scared of him as he was at the start of this journey, he had found someone he could truly confide in.

“Thanks for being a friend, Changbin.”

He smiles sadly, nodding nonetheless, “My pleasure.”

Jisung returned to Woojin, his teammates following him, “Where’s Chan? I wan’t to say bye to him too.”

The oldest furrows his brow, seeming just as bothered, “Not sure, said he had to drive the van somewhere but I’m not sure who was asking that of him so early in the morning.”

Jisung furrows his brows along with his manager. He guessed neither of them would get a true goodbye.

He spoke too soon.

It was almost as if he was a knight in shining armor, waltzing into the lobby with his suitcase and a exasperated Chan in tow.

His eyes searched the crowd of boys, you could only guess who he was looking for, stopping immediately as soon as he found him.

Jisung can’t help the huge smile the spreads across his face.

The older rushed over, practically picking him up in a tight hug, “Did you miss me yet?”

Jisung hits his shoulder as soon as he puts his down, Minho feigning pain, “Where were you?”

He has a smug smile on his face, “I was telling Coach I couldn’t be on his team.”

Jisung’s eyebrows shoot up, “You what?”

“You didn’t think I could live across the globe from you did you?”

“Are you saying you’re going back to Korea?”

Minho shrugs, nodding passively, “Yes, it was implied.”

Jisung skips the part where he hits him and goes straight for the hug, “I can’t stand you sometimes!”

Minho only laughs, “And I love you too, Casanova.”

—

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the ending feels a bit weird however i must go with it !
> 
> ALSO i understand there is probably a big misunderstanding when i say last chapter, this is the last “chapter” however, there will be a HUGE prologue that will probably take me about 4 more weeks to write lmao
> 
> so don’t fret, it’s not over yet
> 
> (see what i did there)
> 
> feedback is appreciated <3
> 
> love u guys :)


	11. SUMMER

_Los Angeles, California, USA_

"I think I'm going crazy."

Kevin almost chokes on his food at Jeongin's sudden outburst, what the hell was he going on about now? He swallows his food slowly, "W—what? Why?"

The younger sighs as he shoves around his soggy noodles idly, "I don't know," he scrunches up his face in thought, "I—I guess I feel stuck."

Kevin still has a shocked expression on his face, forgotten noodles hanging from his chopsticks as he tries to compute what his friend has said.

"I feel like my career isn't going anywhere."

Kevin finally puts down his utensils, scooting his chair closer to the table, "You mean like, baseball?"

Jeongin nods slowly, moving his bowl away from him, no longer hungry.

The older sighs, leaning back in his chair, taking a good look at his friend, "It's only been a couple months, how could you feel stuck already?"

The boy looks out the window of the little Korean restaurant in LA, shaking his head lightly, "I don't feel like I'm improving, I feel like I'm just a static player, practicing everyday and doing the same stuff," he furrows his brow as if cringing at himself, "I feel like I don't belong, like this was a mistake."

Kevin stares at him for a few seconds, face blank.

Suddenly he reaches over and flicks Jeongin's forehead, making him hold it in pain, "Stupid."

"Ow, what the hell was that for, Kevin?"

The older begins to eat his food again while he shakes his head disapprovingly.

Jeongin looks at his friend deadpanned, "The hell is wrong with you man?"

Kevin begrudgingly puts his chopsticks down again, unimpressed look on his face, "You're the most talented pitcher on our team, Yang Jeongin," said boy blushes, "and you're worried about not getting better?" the older scoffs as he shakes his head, "You've been here, what, three months?" Jeongin is quick to correct him, "Four, _four_ months." Kevin rolls his eyes, "Same difference."

"Either way, you don't have to rush man, you're 18 for Christ's sake, you have _years_ ahead of you."

"If you seriously think you're stuck now imagine how you'll feel at the end of your career, when you're in your mid-thirties and these children are vying for your spot on the team."

"You're not stuck, you've just convinced yourself that you are."

Kevin shakes his head continuing to eat again, Jeongin smiling softly at his new friend.

"Thanks, Hyung."

The older smiles, reaching over to hit Jeongin's shoulder playfully, "Anytime," something seems to occur to him, "and if it's any consolation, I think you've been improving like crazy since the beginning of the season."

This makes him blush, giggling nervously, "Ah, thanks."

The youngest begins to eat again, feeling embarrassed by his insecurities, "I'm sorry I put that all on you, I just miss my friends and my home."

Kevin looks up at him with sympathy as he listens, "You and Changbin are all I have right now, the ones that actually understand me."

The older chuckles, "Hey, Mark is trying!"

This makes Jeongin giggle, remembering Mark Tuan's botched Korean, "He is, he's definitely trying."

When they stop laughing Jeongin smiles down at his bowl with hesitancy, "I guess what I'm trying to say is thank you for being there for me."

Kevin pauses for a few moments, looking over the younger. He reaches over to ruffle Jeongin's hair, big smile painting his face, "You're welcome you big dork."

—

_Seoul, South Korea_

Minho was being especially flirty tonight, even more than usual, and in the most inopportune time.

His stupid smirk and his stupid winks.

It was like he was _trying_ to distract him.

Jisung's face immediately draws into a scowl, glaring at his boyfriend with every mean fiber in his being (although there weren't many).

He _was_ trying to distract him.

It was as if Jisung realized all at once that he was playing against his boyfriend.

Their rules that they set out before the game did not include distractions, in fact maybe Minho had pointedly avoided that.

Jisung was going to kill him tonight.

Minho was on first base having just went up to bat, while Jisung was between first and second as short stop.

The batter at home base was preparing to swing, making the rest of the team become more alert.

Jisung wasn't supposed to wish the other team good luck, but he secretly hoped Minho would make it to second base.

Not because he wanted to be near him.

Just because wanted to get revenge.

Maybe his wishing worked because soon enough the batter was on first and Minho was on second, right where he wanted him.

It took a few moments for him to slowly make his way closer without being suspicious. Jisung walks casually closer to second base, keeping his eyes on home, "You think you're slick?"

Minho almost seems surprised that he's interacting with him but he keeps his cool, "I have no idea what you're talking about."

Jisung shrugs, nonchalant air around him, hands crossed behind his back, "Sure you don't, babe."

The boy flushes at the name, Jisung does not use that name too often, but it always makes his heart jump when he does, Jisung would be a fool if he didn't know that, "I don't think you're supposed to be talking to the opposing team so openly, Han-ssi."

Said boy scoffs at this, "Han-ssi".

The audacity this man has to come here and act like he doesn't know him. Of course he would act like they're strangers.

Jisung was definitely going to kill him.

Minho was good at manipulating him, sure, but over the months, Jisung was getting quite good at manipulating his boyfriend too.

All in good fun of course.

Jisung walks even closer to his boyfriend, stand almost side by side, speaking out in front of him as to not be suspicious, "Will you call me that in bed tonight, _Lee Know-ssi_?"

The blood seems to drain from Minho's face, before returning into a red hot blush stealing on the apple of his cheeks.

The short stop smiles evilly, watching the flustered boy, the wheels turning in his head.

Minho seems to want to attack his boyfriend for making him think of such crude things in this moment. He opens his mouth to say something but Jisung is already starting to walk away with that awfully smug smile on his face, waving 'cutely', "Play ball, Lee Minho-ssi."

—

_Los Angeles, California, USA_

"Shhh, the neighbors are trying to sleep." Felix can't help but giggle as his boyfriend shoves him into his apartment, being rowdy as usual.

Changbin grabs both of their athletic bags throwing them off to the side, kicking the door closed with his foot, "The neighbors are a bunch of grannies if they're going to sleep at 10pm."

Felix walks backwards into his little apartment, big smile crowding his face as he shakes his head at the short boy's insult, "Ten o'clock is considered late, babe."

His boyfriend approaches, going to cup the younger's cheeks lovingly, "It's is," he smirks with a nod of his head, "if you're a granny."

He pecks Felix's lips sweetly before making his way into the kitchen, swinging the refrigerator door open, "Tonight, my dear Felix," Changbin grabs a couple cans of beer, almost throwing them down onto the kitchen counter, "we drink."

The Aussie walls over to his boyfriend, unimpressed with his actions, "C'mon, now they're all shook up." His eyes follow Changbin's movements, his hands reaching for the can and grasping the tab, smirk evident on his face, "That is exactly the point, Babe."

Changbin opens the can over the sink, the bubbles pouring down his hand before he lifts it up to his mouth quickly and chugs, beer tracing down his chin.

Felix uncrosses his arms when Changbin finally puts down the can, grabbing a napkin from the table and wiping down his boyfriend's mouth like a mother to her child, "You're an absolute mess," he tosses the napkin in the bin before returning his hands to hips, looking at him disapprovingly, "you know that Seo Changbin?"

Said boy smiles evilly, looking proud of his reckless actions, "And you love me for it."

The Australian can't help the smile that spreads on his face, "Unfortunately."

Changbin raises his eyebrows feigning surprise, "Oh really? Is it really that unfortunate to be in love with me?"

The giggly boy nods playfully, "I've been planning for months on how I'll get rid of you."

He gasps dramatically, "I didn't know you felt this way!"

Felix laughs brightly again, eyes scrunched up in joy, "It's all true!"

Changbin puts on a serious act, picking up the left over beer can, "Come here."

"No!! I refuse to encourage your drinking problem." The Aussie laughs and shrieks in joy as Changbin brings him in for a "hug".

"I refuse to drink alone."

The younger rolls his eyes, arms useless as Changbin presses him close, keeping him from moving. He opens the can with one finger before bringing it to the aussies lips.

Felix tries his best to chug the bubbly liquid but he ends up laughing, getting beer all over the two of them.

His shrieking laughter fills the apartment as he looks at his boyfriends shocked face, beer running down the front of his shirt.

The two begin to laugh uncontrollably as the older starts to chase Felix around, trying to get his revenge, beer forgotten.

Changbin catches him, throwing the skinny boy over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. The Australian beats his boyfriend's back in protest, yelling, "What will the authorities say? Giving alcohol to a minor?"

The older returns the boy to the kitchen, placing him on the counter as he stands between his legs, "They'll know you're trouble as soon as they see you."

Felix places his arms around the older's neck, giving him a sweet peck, "Nothing is ever boring with you."

Changbin chuckles, "Yeah nothings ever boring but now I have no shirt to wear."

The younger rubs his nose against the other's, "How unfortunate."

"Cheeky."

Giggles sound out in the room as little pecks are exchanged, "Alright I seriously need to go back to the hotel and get some more stuff, I have no more underwear here."

Felix pouts, latching on tighter to his boyfriend, "Don't leave~"

"I have to baby, I'm going to be naked at this rate, I have no more clothes," he pauses, "or toothpaste for that matter."

The grip on Changbin's shoulders doesn't loosen, instead Felix continues to argue his case for him staying, "Use my toothpaste, wear my clothes!"

It was a valiant effort on the boys part but Changbin couldn't fall for it anymore. He chuckles, planting a kiss to the side of Felix's head, "Baby, you're a twig compared to me."

The pout is relentless.

"I promise I'll be back as soon as possible, I just need to get some more stuff."

As the older begins to move away, suddenly it's almost as if Felix jumps when he moves, clutching onto his shirt, "Changbin."

There's a look of fear in Changbin's eyes, scared of what Felix was so serious about all of a sudden.

The boy suddenly seemed small, finally shorter than him (something that bothered Changbin terribly), eyes downcast as he hesitated, words obviously on the tip of his tongue.

Changbin lifts his head with a hand on his cheek, looking him in the eyes as if making sure he's okay, "Is there something you want to tell me?"

He nods.

Felix didn't get shy, generally, he was a very out going and friendly person, however, if he was embarrassed or scared he becomes the child, forcing Changbin to be a man in face of his constant immaturity.

The Aussie studies his boyfriends face, looking deeply into his concerned eyes.

"Why don't you move in with me?"

At first it's so quiet Changbin isn't sure he hears it correctly.

"What?"

Felix is quick to shake his head, getting uncomfortable quickly, "Neve mind, nev—"

Changbin repeats it to make sure he heard it right, he has always assumed Felix didn't want that, "Did you ask me to move in with you?"

The Australian looks down again, biting his lip nervously, like it was the first day they met all over again, "Y—yeah, but now I'm realizing it's a stupid idea."

The older lets out a breathe, a short laugh, "No it's not, it's a great idea."

Felix looks up, surprised, eyes wide, "R—really?"

Changbin laughs airily, nodding his head, "Yes, 1000 percent."

"Y—you want to move in with me?"

"Fuck, Felix, I thought you'd never ask."

—

_Seoul, South Korea_

Woojin was running home.

The LG Twins vs. Doosan Bears game ran way too long, he was supposed to be home _hours _ago, however they went into _six_ extra innings _and_ he got stuck in some hell-like traffic. He didn't even want to imagine what Chan was thinking, what if he thought he stood him up?

They had promised each other that as soon as Woojin got home they would Skype until Chan fell asleep.

That would have worked perfectly if he was home at 7pm, like he planned. Chan has always been a night owl anyway, so staying up till 2am wasn't a big deal, however the impending local time in Korea seemed to loom over Woojin, he didn’t want to check.

Woojin stumbled into the elevator, violently pressing his floor number. He fumbled with his phone, pulling it out of his pocket.

It was 11:04pm.

The man's face scrunched up as he did the math in his head.

_Oh god._

It was 6am in LA.

The elevator dinged, signaling for Woojin to step out.

He hesitated, the door beginning to close until Woojin snapped out of it, putting a hand on the door, making it open once again.

Woojin walked into his apartment, the same excited sprint had long since left his body. He wanted to talk to him as soon as possible, but he felt bad about waking him up. He already knew that Chan got almost no sleep sometimes and he would hate for him to be one of the main reasons.

Well, sometimes he felt that that was _always_ the case, but if Woojin had told him this he would deny it immediately.

Woojin threw his jacket somewhere before slowly coming to sit on his bed. He opened his laptop hesitantly, the bright light in the dimly lit room making him squint. The several missed Skype calls made him cringe.

He debated for a few minutes, he wasn't entirely sure what to do.

Sighing deeply he took one last look at Chan's profile pic, smiling boy making his heart flutter.

He'd be damned if he didn't try.

Woojin furrowed his brow as he moved his mouse to the call button, whispering to himself, "I'll call once, if he doesn't answer, I won't bother him anymore."

The ringing was unexpectedly loud, he quickly turned down his volume as he waited. It seemed to go on forever, patiently waiting he picked at his jeans, realizing he should change.

Soon he realized that he wasn't going to pick up, there's no way he would be awake at 6 am.

As the ringing finally stopped, he couldn't hide the disappointment radiating out from him. He just wanted to talk to Chan, lately it seemed like their schedules never synced up, resorting to texting every minute they were free, yet trying to avoid being fired.

As he began to stand up, Woojin suddenly realized how sore his body was, running around today was making him feel like an old man.

He groaned as he forced himself off the bed to cling to his dresser, searching through the drawers for some sweats.

It was as soon as he began to strip when he heard the ringing.

It was Skype.

He rushed over to laptop, kneeling before the end of his bed to look excitedly at the incoming call from an Aussie boy.

Woojin was sure he could have broken his mouse pad with the force in which he answered.

"Hello??" Woojin's eyes were wide with a growing smile as the black screen switched to a dark room with a camera full of bed covers and a sleepy Chan.

He rubbed his eyes tiredly, sleep evident on his face, "Good Morning." a small smile followed as his eyes finally registered the giddy (and shirtless) Woojin decorating his screen.

A sweet smile painted Woojin's face as he took in his beautiful boyfriend. The light from the computer washing out his pale skin in the low quality computer camera. If he had said that he looked beautiful Chan would quickly deny it saying he looked scary without makeup on. Woojin would never agree with that.

The older's eyebrows immediately furrowed, discontented look on his face, "Did I wake you up, isn't it really early there?"

Chan sniffed cutely, rolling over to look over his shoulder for his phone, "Is it?" he continued to search until he was half off the bed, finding it on the floor, "Oh, no it's not that early, it's almost 6:30."

Woojin's displeasure did not clear from his face, "That's still way too early, what time did you go to sleep?"

The sleepy boy giggled, "I think I passed out at 2:30, got tired of waiting for you." he says this as a joke, hoping Woojin will forget about the fact that he only got 4 hours of sleep.

It's almost as if Woojin's face pales as he starts to panick, stuck in a loading phase as he tries to figure out the fastest way to explain.

Chan giggles quietly as he listens to Woojin's panicked explanation, making the older pout, "I'm sorry I made you wait, I feel so bad."

The Australian only shakes his head slowly, "I love you, Kim Woojin."

This brings a soft smile to his boyfriend's face, opening his mouth to respond just as lovingly when he realizes Chan is asleep once again.

He whispers a quiet "I love you too" back as to not wake him up, before muting himself.

Woojin decided he would fall asleep with his boyfriend beside him.

—

_Seoul, South Korea_

"Make sure the coast is clear."

Hyunjin rolls his eyes, tired of Seungmin's nagging everytime they do this, "I got it, I got it."

Hyunjin leans his head out the back door of the stadium, looking around for paparazzi or pedestrians roaming the streets.

Seungmin stares at Hyunjins back expectantly, squeezing their intertwined hands as he watches his boyfriend scan the area.

The boy turns around with an excited smile on his face, cheeks slightly bitten from the cold already. He gives Seungmin a sweet peck before giving his report, "The coast is clear, sir."

Seungmin smiles, shaking his head at his boyfriends antics before pushing him out the door slightly.

Hyunjin raises his eye brows as he walks backwards out the door, challenging him, "Oh? So you think your tough?"

The mentioned boy giggles quietly, nodding in response, "I could beat you up any day.”

The tall boy presses him up against the brick wall next the door in response, "Oh really?"

Seungmin looks up at Hyunjin, refusing to back down, "Yes, really."

Hyunjin wastes no time kissing the boy, cupping his cheeks sweetly, contrasting the kiss.

The kiss was a mix of sweet and sensual, fast but careful, rubbing up and down his sides, squeezing every once in a while. When he bites his lip, Seungmin snaps out of it, hitting his boyfriends sides, trying to get his attention.

He only moves from his mouth to his neck, letting the boy ( not really ) speak, "Hyunjin we can't do this in public what is someone sees?"

The tall boy trails up and down Seungmin's neck with kisses, taking a short break to respond, "It's 11:30 at night, no ones out walking around at this hour."

Seungmin rolls his eyes as Hyunjin nips at his neck feistily, "Tonight was the biggest game of the season there could still be paparazzi hanging around."

Finally the boy pulls away, staring into his boyfriends eyes with love and lust all mixed around. He pecks him quickly with his swollen lips, pulling away to study his face, "Let them see, I don't care, maybe then they'll finally know how much I love you.”

Seungmin smiles at him, this big doofus sometimes surprises him.

"You really wouldn't mind people knowing?"

He shrugs, a looking down for a sec only to retune his gaze a few seconds later, "I don't know, not having to hide all the time seems pretty nice."

Seungmin thinks he might cry, he can feel the tears forming, but he won't let them fall, "Yeah?"

He smiles sadly at his boyfriends glassy eyes, kissing his forehead sweetly before holding him in his arms, "Yeah.”

—

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> helloooooo
> 
> it’s been a bit, very sorry about that !
> 
> i’ve been struggling to find time to write but i hope you guys will be patient with me
> 
> this is the first of four parts of the prologue which, seems quite hefty but these aren’t as long as my typical chapter
> 
> usually i write a 5k word chapter, this one only turned out to be 3.5k
> 
> so obviously i will write an autumn, winter, and spring prologue as well so please be patient with me while i try to finish out this fic 
> 
> things going with me if you want to know:  
(optional)  
1\. i’m completely healed from my car crash so no worries !  
2\. i just finished my fall season of dance so no more performances for a while ! (more time to write yay!)  
3\. school is kicking my ass :/  
4\. i’ve been a bit sicky (by a bit i mean very)  
-> DID YOU GUYS KNOW THAT IF YOU COUGH A LOT YOU CAN GET BRUISED RIBS WTF  
5\. bruised ribs wtf  
6\. spring breaks coming !! :))
> 
> anyways thats some info you probably didn’t really want to know so yk i get it if you skipped it 
> 
> thanks for the support, love you guys <3
> 
> feedback is always appreciated :)


	12. AUTUMN

_Seoul, South Korea_

"Is it ironic that I'm nervous?"

Minho turns to his boyfriend, smile gracing his face as he looks lovingly at the boy sitting on the examination table. He leans over to kiss him on the side of his head, "You're always nervous, baby."

A small laugh fills the room, Jisung picking the rip in his jeans to distract himself, "That is very true."

The older simply rubs the boys thigh soothingly, reminding him that he was there if he needed him.

The wall was a sterile white, pamphlets warning of disease and endorsing vaccinations sitting on a table next to the chair, a chair for Minho.

Jisung took extra notice that instead of taking the seat that seemed so far away from him, Minho stood attentively next to his boyfriends side, preferring to be as close to him as possible.

The sharps box stared dauntingly at the nervous boy, he didn't do too well with needles, but he was reminded of what Minho said when they first walked into the doctors office, "They're not going to draw your blood baby, there's no need, you're just going to tell them why you're here."

He was instantly calmed, the princely man too was examining the room, taking care to look at each of the things lining the walls.

The younger is momentarily reminded of the pediatric doctors office he went to as a kid, his mom holding his hand and stroking his back when he coughed weakly.

Except today he wasn't sick, not physically at the very least.

Jisung was sure just visiting the doctors office alone would send him into a panic attack but, Minho, Minho was here.

That made it all better.

"Thank you for coming with me."

Minho snaps his head to face his boyfriend, confusion dotting his features, "What.." he trails off as he examines Jisung stressed features.

"I don't think I would have ever made it here if it wasn't for you," he fiddles with his fingers, "I—I would never have confronted this so head on."

The older gives him a small smile, taking his hand and rubbing the knuckles, "I may have been there for you, but it took your own strength to get you here."

Jisung nods, pressing the lightest kiss to his boyfriend's lips, "You keep me sane."

Minho scrunches up his nose teasingly, "Of course, you're absolutely crazy, someone's gotta take care of you."

Giggles fill the room as he pushes his boyfriend playfully when the door opens, a sweet lady maybe in her early thirties walks in, "Good morning."

Both boys were caught off guard, but they both bow politely greeting her as she situates herself at the counter, "What seems to be the problem?"

There's a heartbeat starting to pulse in Jisung's ears, a breath escaping him.

But then there's a squeeze on his hand, Minho's small reassurance, and it's all okay.

"I think I have anxiety."

—

_Los Angeles, California, USA_

Felix was perched quietly at the kitchen counter, textbooks spread out before him as he studied the words with innate focus. The whole apartment was silent, and nothing stirred, the only thing that could be heard was the silent whirr of the air conditioning (because yes, even in the fall, LA managed to be burning hot) along with the intermittent turning of pages.

A ding from Felix's phone broke him of his trance, making him jump slightly as his head snapped towards the direction of the sound, hidden deep under his study material.

The Australian reached over to unbury it, hoping for some relief from the monotonous teachings of his unrelenting sports medicine textbook.

His eyes turned over the words hopefully only to find a useless notification from one of the stupid games he had downloaded for when he was bored in class. Felix sighed as he haphazardly slid his phone away from him, placing his head in hands frustratedly.

His mind felt fuzzy, not sure how much more brain capacity he had left, it would be a miracle to even finish the page. He looked out at his abandoned problems from math applications and his unfinished research essay.

As much as he wanted to tell himself it could wait till the end of the week, he knew how much he would resent his past self for leaving all of his work to cram on a Thursday night, (because it's seems his professors refuse to make a due date on any other day than a Friday).

Now that Felix had started school again, he saw Changbin significantly less. He missed going out to a baseball game every night with the one he loves, he missed watching his boyfriend play. He missed feeling like a doctor, examining _real_ patients, doing what he loved.

He missed it all, but mostly, he missed him.

Felix was willing himself to dive back in, finding the paragraph he left off on, when he heard the door bolt begin to turn.

Changbin was home.

The Aussie immediately turned to his textbook, prepared to pretend he was currently enthralled in a very interesting piece of literature.

"Honey, I'm home!"

Felix acted surprised, though smile evident on his face, "You've been studying English for what, 8 months now? And this is what you remember?"

Changbin chucks his athletic bag somewhere in the living room, coming to plop himself down on the couch, pain evident in the way he groans when he falls, "Only the important things, baby."

A scowl forms on the younger's face as he observes his boyfriends actions, "You okay?"

A lie forms upon the older's lips, something Felix has heard many times, "Yeah, I'm fine."

The Australian doesn't buy it, leaving his place at the counter to walk around the couch towards his boyfriend, "Yeah, sure, and the Earths flat."

Changbin raises his eyes brows, pointing a finger at the approaching boy, "Hey, that's not completely disproven."

Felix rolls his eyes as he sits down next to the aching boy, "Give me your arms."

The older tried to seem surprised, like this interaction hadn't happened before, but Felix knew very well how much pain came with the long and intense training Changbin had been doing in order to compete with the rivaling baseball players of the World Series.

Especially his arms.

"Hey, now that's not a very polite way to ask—"

Felix grabbed his arm without waiting for the whiny boy to finish complaining, rubbing small circles into his bicep.

If Changbin was one thing, he was stubborn, and it was very hard to convince him he needed help from anyone else, "Lix, I'm fine, really."

The Aussie immediately stops his movements to look his boyfriend dead in the eye, completely unimpressed by his attempts to stop him, "This is my job, Changbin, let me at least do this one thing."

He seems hesitant, but eventually he relaxes, letting himself sit back onto the couch.

It's silent for a few moments, Felix glancing up at the older's pained disposition, "How's practice been?"

A small smile grows on the older's face, turning to look at his boyfriend with the first happy face of the night, "It's been really _really_ good."

Felix can't help but smile at this, eyes flickering back and forth from the bicep in his hands to Changbin's cute smile. It made him eternally happy that his boyfriend loved his job, that despite the training and pain, he still enjoyed himself, he could live easily as long as Changbin was happy.

Changbin tilts his head, gesturing towards the pile of abandoned papers on the counter, "You been studying hard?"

The Aussie can only roll his eyes, focusing on the arm in his hands rather than willing himself to look in the smug boy's eyes, "Yes, _Mom_."

The sass was returned with a playful slap from the older's free arm, "Hey at least give me a dad, mom sounds like I cut the crusts off your bread."

Felix scrunches up his nose teasingly, getting all up in his boyfriends face, "Yeah well dad sounds like I'm going to give you a daddy complex."

Changbin laughs, and Felix can see the joke forming as the older's eyes sparkle, "I mean.. shit.."

Bright laughter fills the room as Felix relinquishes the sore arm to beat up Changbin momentarily, "You think you're funny?!"

The older can't stop laughing as he begs for mercy, yelling and squirming as he tries to escape the wrath of Lee Felix.

"Yah! What happened to me being a cripple?!"

Felix laughs loudly as he transitions to tickling the boys sides evilly, "And what happened to you being fine?!"

A noise complaint or two was made.

—

_Seoul, South Korea_

A burning sizzled in Woojin's heart, from what though, he wasn't sure.

Maybe it was excitement, maybe it was fear, maybe it was a feeling of joy.

He's reminded of the saying his father always used to say when he was being especially impatient, "A watched pot never boils."

Today however he couldn't help it.

When he tried to open his book, when he tried to check his phone, when he tried to watch the people walking by or the extra luggage going around in circles on the baggage claim, he always ended up with his eyes glued to the door.

The door that he was sure Chan could be walking out of any minute.

It was true, his plane was landing soon, but it was as if Woojin couldn't handle being away from him for a single extra second. He wanted to be in his arms as soon as he saw him.

The impatient man finally gave in, putting his book down frustratedly as he crossed his arms.

He did not like to wait.

He scowled at the people who entered with out a certain dimpled smile, unintentionally of course, however he did make a few people uncomfortable.

He stretched his legs achingly, thinking that maybe he had been sitting too long. Despite the knowledge that he would start pacing as soon as he got up, he stood up slowly, stretching his arms above his head.

Woojin drew in a fortifying breath as he closed his eyes, willing himself to calm down, to accept that he would come soon.

When he opened his eyes, he noticed a new flood of people who had started entering through the revolving doors, rushing to their families and their luggage pouring out of the baggage claim.

But there.

Stopped.

Stood a certain dimpled smile.

Standing still in the midst of chaos.

He almost looked shocked to finally see him, to see the man across the room, however the smile growing on his face (and were those tears? ) showed his true emotions.

For all the talk of not being able to be away from him for a single moment, he found himself frozen, unable to move his feet.

A shuffle sprang up however, when Bang Chan's first tear fell from his face, Woojin couldn't handle to watch him cry. He ran over, the huge smile on his face contrasting his frantic walking.

The sob wracking the younger's body was quelled by Woojin's huge embrace, but the tears came faster with the whispers in his ear, "Don't cry, you'll make me cry."

Chan only clung on tighter to him, "I missed you, _so _fucking much."

Woojin took the Australian's face out from his shoulder, wiping the tears from his soft cheeks, "I missed you too, you big softie."

Chan's fists beat the older's chest softly in retaliation, pout gracing his beautiful face, "Hypocrite." He says gesturing to man's own glassy eyes.

Their hands wouldn't leave each other, either squeezing a shoulder or hand, or caressing a cheek or a head. Woojin smiled softly, "You know you love me."

Chan smiled, a tear slipping out quickly, "I do, with all my heart."

—

_Los Angeles, California, USA_

A knot had formed in Jeongin's stomach, this feeling.

He could throw up, he could cry, who knew.

He couldn't seem to swallow the lump in his throat as he walked down the daunting hallway.

He wasn't really sure if it counted, but his coach was basically his boss. If he decided it was right, Jeongin could be fired, traded, his contract could be terminated (though he wasn't sure what the reason would be).

It was nerve racking, whether he liked it or not.

He was technically an adult, but he still couldn't help but feel like a child, waiting to be scolded, standing in front of that terrifying office door.

"Jeongin?"

It wasn't his coaches voice, however it was the sound of someone he was very close to.

When he turned around there was a charming, princely Kevin Moon, charisma pouring out of him.

A genuine smile graced Jeongin's face for the first time since the coach asked to talk to him, one of relief, "Kevin? What are you doing here?"

His smile was comforting, one that calmed him immediately, "Coach Ross asked me to translate."

The mention of the man's name made the smile disappear from the younger's face, he only nodded in reply.

Jeongin's face had noticeably changed and turned down, away from the older. Kevin leaned over slightly, trying to meet his eyes again, breaking the tense silence, "Do you know what it's about?"

Eyebrows drawn, the boy shakes his head softly, "No," he takes a deep breath, "no I don't."

Kevin didn't like the silence, or the worried expression painting the boys face, it made him feel like Jeongin had done something wrong, though he was sure he hadn't.

Suddenly the younger spoke up again, "I'm scared."

A ghost of a laugh fills the room.

A hand grasps his, tightly, reassuringly.

Jeongin looks up, piercing eyes meeting his, "Don't be, you're a child prodigy, Yang Jeongin, he'd be stupid to even attempt ruining his chances with you."

A sarcastic laugh falls out of the worried boys mouth, still a smile nonetheless. Kevin smiles sweetly as he looks the younger, "And if that man has one bad thing to say about you, I will take it upon myself to beat him up."

The laughter was cut short by an assistant emerging from the office door.

Kevin dropped his hand, but he could still feel his presence, his fingers pressed against his knuckles.

The assistant was smiling as she gained the boys attention, "Coach Ross is ready to see you."

Jeongin looked over at Kevin one last time, met with a reassuring smile, he was going to be fine, no matter what.

The young boy nodded as he walked through the door, Kevin following behind.

The office was much more comforting than Jeongin had expected, colorful sports posters and trophies lining the walls. The paperwork that Coach wasn't very fond of (as mentioned many times by the man) was stacked up messily on his desk.

The next thing he noticed was that there was an apparent smile on the man's face, a very _very _good sign that the man had decided this was good news and not unfortunate ones.

"Good after noon, Mr. Yang, how was practice?"

Jeongin had barely been able to change out of his practice clothes before he had been told that Coach wanted to see him, the abruptness of it all was what scared him the most.

The young boy's hesitancy had Kevin opening his mouth, but Jeongin waved him off. He didn't need him to translate.

"It was," he couldn't really think of a more complex word so he settled with a stilted, "good."

Coach Ross smiled heartily, he was a sweet man when he wasn't on the field, and he knew that. Jeongin watched as he talked, but he only found himself catching a few of the words, and putting them together was still a puzzle for him.

As soon as he was done talked he looked over at Kevin's happy face, it _was_ good news, "He says he sorry to have called you in so abruptly, but he has something very exciting to share with you."

A weight was lifted off his shoulders.

Kevin had no doubts that it would be good, Jeongin was one of coach's favorites, but the young boy would refuse to believe it.

Jeongin looks down briefly at the Coaches intertwined fingers as he talks, rather than focusing on what he says he breathes for what feels like the first time since the locker room.

An abrupt hand came down on Jeongin's knee suddenly, causing Jeongin to snap his head towards the boy griping his leg. A surprised, a shocked expression. Kevin was looking at Coach Ross with wide eyes, a huge smile growing.

Kevin spoke a mile a minute, barely even getting his words out before he took another breath, "Jeongin, you're a nominee for Rookie of the Year."

The news came at him so quickly he was sure he heard it wrong.

The boy looked in between the Coach and Kevin, "W—what?"

Coach Ross spoke up, "Rookie of the Year."

Everyone knew those words.

You had to.

Jeongin hadn't been in America too long, but there were somethings he had learned on a baseball field that any sports player should know, the curse words.

_"Holy shit."_

—

_Seoul, South Korea_

(goodbye yellow brick road covered by sara bareilles)

It was loud.

But Seungmin couldn't hear anything.

It was all dull, muffled, bright neon lights muted to passing shadows and police sirens cast away as shrilling background noise.

The flashing of cameras made the boy flinch, the pushing of the paparazzi made him cry harder.

The tears were hot on his cheeks, but he couldn't feel them, in fact he wasn't sure when they started.

The relief of the cool autumn air was welcomed, feeling sticky in the midst of the men.

He stared blankly at the scene as the police officer pushed him, back hitting a camera, a man. He suddenly picked back up his sprint, yelling, screaming. The officer held him back, "That's my boyfriend! Let me see him!" The gasps of a few of the men behind him laid silent in his ears, "Please!" The sobs wracked his body as the police officer finally let him go, saying something, Seungmin didn't even want to think in another language, he wanted to see _him_.

He had to be okay.

The alley laid open before him as he ran across the street, the police car, the officers _shaking_ him, opening his eyelids, flashing a flashlight over his eyes.

The spoon, the man, a _dirty _man, shivering, scowling.

Seungmin despised him, he didn't have to know him.

The tears fell hot and fast, he almost fell on top on him, slapping his cheeks, yelling screaming.

"Hyunjin!! Dear god, wake up!"

He watched his own tears fall onto the man's face, the man he loved, this shell of the man.

His arms were drawn from him as he was dragged away from him. He struggled and twisted, screaming bloody murder, distantly hearing the officers yelling, "Sir, you have to let us treat him."

When he relaxed, he was sat on the ground, wet cement soaking his jeans as his tears soaked his shirt.

Seungmin clutched his head as his tears fell.

He almost couldn't watch, the paramedics lifting him onto the stretcher, lifting him into the ambulance.

He hit the ground helplessly, his heart squeezed in his chest, and his head spun.

The tears stopped coming after a while.

An officer walked over slowly, lifting Seungmin off the ground gently, helping in into ambulance, the seat next to his unconscious boyfriend.

He was calmer now, he knew all he could do was hold his hand, and hope.

He wasn't mad anymore either.

Who could he be mad at?

Hyunjin?

The cocaine?

No, that was stupid.

—

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello ! lovely day ! 
> 
> the last part was a bit sad, but i promise things will be okay :)
> 
> thank you for being patient, only two more parts after this ! today i managed to not update super late (i actually was finished writing yesterday afternoon, that never happens wow) anyways thank you for reading, love you all <3
> 
> feedback is always appreciated:)


	13. WINTER

_Sydney, Australia _

Holy fuck Felix's stomach was churning.

Because there he was.

He can't remember the last time he said more than a few words to him, not since he started school, not since Changbin.

But as soon as he got that text, that text that asked him if he was home for the holidays, that stupid text that brought him here, to this stupid bar.

He couldn't say no, in fact, the very realization that they used to be very close friends hit Felix in the face like a ram truck.

Felix thought he could forget about him, forget that Christopher Bang even existed.

But then he was reminded of Changbin, he didn't need to be worried, because no one would compare to the boyfriend he has now, no old crushes would change that.

Felix drew in a fortifying breath, standing up a bit straighter as he aimed for the bar stool, waiting for a certain Lee Felix.

Chan had already gotten a drink, and was looking around hopelessly, waiting for the boy's arrival.

When Felix finally stood next to him, he was faced away, eyes drawn to the football game on the TV above the bar.

He stood there awkwardly for a few seconds, unsure of what to do, until he finally cleared his throat, a low voice someone could recognize anywhere, "Chan.."

The older jumped, head flipping quickly to take in the lanky boy to his left. A smile grows quickly, taking him to his feet to finally hug him, "Shit, Felix, hey!"

"I feel like I haven't talked to you in forever!"

Felix's inner conscience wants to scream, _"We haven’t! That’s why_!", but the hug takes him out of his pessimistic thoughts, "I know." Felix lightly rubs the older's back, he _had_ missed him, no matter how scared he was to talk to him.

Chan pulls away after a few moments gesturing for Felix to take a seat at the bar stool next to his, "How have you been?"

Felix couldn't help the small smile that spread on his face, he should have known. Chan's overflowing charisma could calm him down without even trying.

He didn't even know why he was nervous.

Maybe this was closure.

"I've been really good, schools been beating my ass though."

The older laughed loudly, there was an overwhelming feeling of joy in the air of the bar, and it was quite contagious, "Hey, but college is a walk in the park compared to high school."

Felix scoffs, teasing him, "What do you know? You're a business major."

"Ohh, so you think you're better than me since you're going to be a doctor?"

The younger smiles, shrugging, "If the shoe fits."

Chan playfully hits Felix's shoulder, "Lemme get you something to drink."

Felix watches the man interact with the bar tender, he knew what Felix wanted to drink, he could never forget.

It was weird, a new feeling, to be able to look at the man without feeling the butterflies, with out his heart palpitating.

It felt like relief.

He was going to have to do it at some point, it was only a matter of when he would finally will himself to do it.

"So.." Chan looked like he wanted to ask something but he didn't exactly look like he knew how to say it, "did Changbin come with you to Australia?"

Felix downed his drink, and it wasn't like it was a shot, no he downed his fruity drink in less than ten seconds, "I used to have a crush on you."

Chan, who didn't want Felix to feel like he was drinking alone, almost spit out his drink, "W-what?"

Felix knocked on the bar, requesting a shot this time, those icy drinks give him a brain freeze, "So nice to be back in Australia where I can drink legally."

The older still had an incredulous look on his face, "So you're just going to ignore what you just said."

The boy snorts, rubbing his face tiredly, "I wish."

When he looks back up at the Aussie beside him he sees he's frustrated with the lack of information, bordering on anger.

"Look I'm not telling you this because I expect something from you. Hell, you and me both know we would be morons to give up on the people we have now, but this is for me."

With a sad smile, Felix looks up at his friend, "This is closure."

Chan has a concerned look on his face, as he often did, "And, are the feelings all gone?"

Felix absent mindedly plays with the napkin set before him, folding it nervously.

"I'm sure a part of me will always love you."

He back tracks, panic leaking into his voice, "And-and I do, you're like my best friend, but no, not like that."

The older smiles amusedly, laughs when the boy slams down his shot, "How long?"

Felix laughs, "Is it cheesy if I say since the first day I met you?"

Bright laughter, signature to Chan fills the loud room, "Oh god, yes."

The younger reaches up and flicks his friend's head, "Don't let it go to your head, asshole."

"Oh yeah, or what?"

"Or I'll tell Woojin, he'll definitely be on my side."

—

_Seoul, South Korea_

"Is this all, sir?"

Woojin looked down at his sad box of cereal and a pint of milk sitting on the convenience store counter.

He felt pathetic.

"Yes, ma'am."

It was an old woman, one who seemed to only have a job because she couldn't stand staying home all day, her gray hair and sweet smile however lifted Woojin's spirits and quelled his late night-long distance relationship blues.

"And what is a handsome man like you doing here so late at night?"

Woojin laughed, shaking his head as he looked down shyly, "I wish I knew."

The lady placed the cereal box into the shopping bag, looking up at Woojin before turning to the milk jug, "Surely a handsome man like you has someone waiting for them at home."

A grimace formed on the man's face, "Something like that."

The milk jug was double bagged before she responded, "Then where are they?"

Woojin smiles sadly, "Australia."

The woman can't help the shocked expression that forms on her face, "Wow, that's a long way from home."

A sigh can be heard, "Don't I know it."

He didn't he want to know how she'd react if he told her he usually was in LA.

"That will be 7,572 won, sweetheart."

Woojin got out his card quickly, inserting it into the machine. He looked up as he waited, finding the TV in the corner of the small store, a ceremony of some kind going on.

"Ah, you know him?"

The man's head snapped away from the screen to return his attention to the lady behind the register, "Excuse me?"

"He's the one who transferred from the Doosan Bears a while ago, Yang Jeongin?"

His eyes widen at the name, "You said Yang Jeongin?"

The lady smiles as she tears off the receipt, "Yeah he just won the rookie of the year award tonight, I just finished watching the ceremony, he has quite a large fan club here in Korea."

Woojin smiled proudly up at the TV, a video of Jeongin delivering a speech at a podium, cameras flashing, living the dream.

"Well I'll be damned."

—

_Los Angeles, California, USA_

Jeongin shook violently.

He quickly splashed water in his face, watching the water drip off his chin in the bathroom mirror.

Everyone else was outside at the after party, however the boy couldn't stand to be in the crowd for very long.

Holy fuck.

He just won rookie of the year.

Jeongin dried off his face, hands still shaking. He lets out a curt laugh, smiling for the millionth time tonight.

He closes his eyes, drawing in a deep breath.

The bathroom door opens slowly, a hesitant Kevin Moon approaching, "Jeongin? You okay?"

The younger smiles at the sight of the older, "Yeah, I'm—I'm okay, I'm great."

Kevin walks over quickly, wasting no time bringing to boy into a rib crushing hug, Jeonginblinking away his tears in the boy's shoulder, "Jesus, Jeongin, you make me speechless."

This was a new one, different from all the other congratulations he had received

"What—what do you mean?"

The older pulled away, placing his hands on the rookie's shoulders, "There's so many things I want to say to you, but _fuck _I can't seem to put anything into words."

Jeongin couldn't help the swelling of his heart, but it broke him to see the way Kevin's eyes shone, maybe he was just as emotional as him. The younger lifted his hands up to cup the older's cheeks, wiping the tears, "Are you crying? Oh my god you big softie."

Kevin pouts as the joyful tears pour out, "Do you blame me?"

Jeongin rolls his eyes, a sad smile on his face, "Yes! Why are you crying for _me_?"

  
The older examines the boy's soft hair, petting his head with care. It was his turn to wipe the other's tears, "Something inside makes me want to care for you, from the first day I met you."

He nods, sniffling lightly, his eyes were lit up despite the tears silently running down his cheeks.

"You always impressed me, I—I couldn't help but look up to you even though I'm your senior."

He laughs, stroking the boy's head again, it was loving, "I'm a sucker for people who are good at what they do, especially those who work their asses off despite it."

"Never have I met someone with the same amount of drive and rigor that seems to pour out of you, Yang Jeongin."

Jeongin blushes, shaking his head, getting shy.

Kevin lifts the boy's head in his hands gently, "I couldn't help but fall for the ambition in your eyes."

Jeongin kissed him, and for the first time in a while, he knew he wouldn't ever have to bealone.

—

_Sydney, Australia _

"What if they hate me?"

Felix groans for millionth time that day, rubbing his temples with frustration.

He figured that Changbin would have given up by the time they were walking up the driveway of his parents home, however even approaching his childhood home, he continued his worrying.

"Changbin," the Aussie turns around wrapping his arms around the boy's middle, looking the big baby in the eyes, "I'm going to tell you for the last time," he pecks the boy's lips softly, "they're going to love you."

Scoffing, Changbin rolls his eyes before bumping his boyfriend's nose with his, "That's what they always say."

Felix drops his head on the man's shoulder in frustration, when he lifts his head he cups the older's cheeks, "You're rich and famous, Changbin, what is there not to like?"

Before an objection can even come out of Changbin's mouth, the Aussie is slapping a hand over his mouth laughing at the way the muscular boy pouts so childishly, "Furthermore, it is Christmas, and no one is in the mood to ridicule you, plus, your _dearest boyfriend_ is asking _very nicely_ for you to come play nice with his family."

Changbin smiles at the boy's cuteness, shaking his head at his sarcasm.

"So, will you please just come inside?"

There's only a small portion of hesitancy left on Changbin's disposition.

"If you're good, I'll left you make out with me on my old bed like they do in all the movies."

Changbin doesn't waste time turning the boy around and wrapping his arm around the younger's shoulders, leading them to the front door.

"What are your Aunt and Uncles names again?"

—

_Seoul, South Korea_

lover, please stay by nothing but thieves

A cool breeze blew through the streets of Seoul, and if you wore a coat, it seemed quite nice outside.

Honey light splotched the shiny pavement and the leaves on the trees rustled calmly. Seungmin might have liked it, however this night was quite bittersweet for him.

Their night had started out great, in fact they were perfectly happy not acknowledging the ramifications of a night like this.

However after dinner, their façade broke and they were left with a silence that spoke for them.

Hyunjin's hand was warm in Seungmin's, they swung slightly between them as they walked.

"It's pretty out tonight."

Seungmin looks up at the taller boy sweetly, trying to start the conversation desperately.

He only gets a nod in response.

And that was the end of the conversation.

Fairy lights strung along the trees, giving a yellow hue to their cold night.

A bench, it sat beneath the trees, maybe Seungmin wanted to sit there.

He sighs at the empty bench, "Ninety days isn't too long, and—and the rehab place I was looking at looks really nice, I'm sure you'll be—,"

However Hyunjin started to shake, the vibrations transferring through their intertwined hands. Seungmin turned away from the bench to find the black-haired boy's bangs shadowing his teary eyes.

"Oh my god, baby, are you crying?"

Hyunjin looked up from the ground, a pained look on his face, "Seungmin," said boy takes up his hands to grasp the crying face in front of him and wipe his tears, "I'm so sorry."

A gasp escapes the worried boy's lips, "W—why are you sorry baby?"

Sobs start to shiver through Hyunjin's body, drawing attention to the passerby's however the couple doesn't seem to notice.

"If—if I—I wa—," hiccups break up his words, his breathing coming in ragged, breaking Seungmin's heart.

"Shhh, take a breath, Hyunjinnie." The shorter pet his boyfriends head sweetly, trying to calm the boy's ceaseless crying.

He nods in response, pawing at his eyes as he tries to wipe the endlessly flowing tears, _"Fuck,_ I'm just so sorry you ended up with a man like me."

Seungmin shakes his head frantically, tears pooling in his own eyes at the sight of the broken boy, "_What_ are you talking about? You're the light of my life, I _love_ you, with my whole heart."

He nods, looking at the ground, curt laugh, "I know you do, _I know_."

"But at what cost you know?"

Seungmin can't believe the words that are coming out of his boyfriends mouth, "That's such bullshit, Hyunjin, you know that."

He's crying too, "I would give up everything to be with you, it's unfair for you to say such things about yourself."

Hyunjin sobs, shaking his head, silently telling the boy no, "I'm so _fucking selfish_, you have no idea."

"I know what I'm putting you through, yet—yet, I can't seem to force myself to push you away."

Quickly Hyunjin falls into the man's arms, sobbing into his shoulder heart achingly, "Just, please never leave me, Seungmin."

"Please stay with me, please, god _please_ stay."

Seungmin retrieves the boy out of his shoulder to look him the eyes. They were red and puffy.

The pain was so strong it stung.

Fuck, Seungmin loves him so much.

"I will never leave you, Hwang Hyunjin, never."

Hyunjin leans into Seungmin's open palm, his words making him smile, "You just have promise me to get better, that's all I ask, baby."

"I just want you to get better."

\--

_Seoul, South Korea_

carry me home by jorja smith

"W—what are you doing, Minho?"

Jisung's wide eyes couldn't believe what he was seeing.

It was a sight for sure.

One minute they were standing Hangang Bridge, trying to find stars in the city sky, and the next, Minho had gotten down on one knee.

"M—minho what are you doing? Seriously."

"Han Jisung."

Both of said boy's hands come up to cover his mouth in shock.

"From the minute you entered my life, Han Jisung, something in me changed. I fell so deeply in love with you and i realized something."

"I realized the moment I stopped being lonely, the moment I stopped living for a pre-prescribed life, the moment I started living for myself, it all coincided with meeting _you_."

"I don't quite know what I would do without you, probably would be a shell of the man I am right now, living a life in LA, unknowing of the amazing adventures I would have with Han Jisung."

"I want to spend the rest of my life with you, Casanova."

Jisung's eyes betray him, letting his joyful tears spill onto his puffy cheeks.

He almost can't watch as he pulls out the little black box from his coat, two gold rings sat there neatly.

Minho lets out a ghost of a laugh, "It's not much, and—and I know gay marriage is still illegal here, but, a ring is more metaphorical than most people realize anyways."

The younger laughs through his tears at the man's pessimistic humor, even in a moment like this.

"I guess what I'm asking is: will you spend the rest of your life with me? I've already made up my mind and it would be a very hard existence if you refused."

Jisung laughs again, forcing the boy off his knee, snatching the box and shoving the promise onto his ring finger, "Jesus, Minho, you didn't even have to ask."

The younger grabs his boyfriend's face, kissing him with every ounce of passion he has, holding him as close as possible.

Jisung would die to keep the same feeling he gets when he sees the look in Minho's loving eyes permanently fixed in his heart.

They stare endlessly into each others eyes, picking out every detail, examining every little mark, things they had already memorized, "I love you, Lee Minho."

Minho pecks the boy's lips again, "Is that a yes?"

Jisung scoffs, hitting Minho gently, "Yes, you absolute idiot."

—

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so much crying in this chapter ! 
> 
> however mostly tears of joy :))
> 
> i can't believe the very last chapter is upon us, i have thoroughly enjoyed writing this for you guys <3
> 
> the story will be neatly be wrapped up with all happy endings so no need to worry :))
> 
> thanks for reading guys and as always feedback is appreciated <3


	14. SPRING

_Los Angeles, California, USA_

"Something just came to mind but it's very embarrassing."

Minho looked up from the sink, eyebrows furrowed, "What is it?"

Jisung shook his head looking down, shyly. He had been waiting for Minho to finish using the restroom but it had hit him as soon as his boyfriend had started washing his hands.

"I don't know if you remember, but—"

Jisung sighs placing his hands over his eyes embarrassed as ever.

The airport bathroom was completely empty except for the two, their flight had been delayed two hours so it was very late when they arrived in LA.

Minho turns around after drying his hands, dragging the blushing boy over to him by his wrists, the same ones that covered his blushing face, "What? Tell me."

Jisung sighs finally looking into Minho's eyes with a pout, "Do you remember seeing me in the airport bathroom our first day in LA?"

The smile on Minho's face grows, "How could I forget, Casanova?"

"Ahh! I hoped you didn't know it was me!"

Minho chuckles, hands releasing the boy's wrists to come down and poke his sides playfully, "No, it was definitely Han Jisung."

The embarrassed boy covers his eyes in defeat, completely leaning on his boyfriend as he buries his face in his neck.

The older wraps his arms around him in a hug, smiling at how cute he could be. He kisses his temple sweetly, "The look on your face when I caught you staring, _priceless_."

A muffled whine emerges from Jisung, face still glued to his boyfriend's neck, "Stop it.." he draws out the last word childishly.

"And how embarrassed you looked when that man ran into you."

Jisung completely pulls away from the older, crossing his arms with an unbelievable pout, "You're mean."

Minho tried to bring the boy back to him, laughing at the boy's stubbornness, "You brought it up!"

Jisung stopped his struggles, a scowl (that wouldn't hurt a fly) appearing on his face.

"That's it." he starts to walk out of the bathroom, raising his voice as he gets farther away, "No more kisses for the rest of the night!"

The smile drops off of his face, concern dotting his surprised features, "Wait, no Casanova, wait—baby, I take it back!"

—

"Welcome to our humble abode!"

Changbin fumbled with the keys as he opened the door to his and Felix's apartment, "Sorry, this is as clean as it gets."

Jisung laughed, the dirty living room did not surprise him one bit, neither Changbin nor Felix seemed like the cleanly type, "Our place would look the exact same way if Minho didn't obsessively clean our apartment every weekend."

Minho gasps in response, deeply offended, eyes glaring at his boyfriend relentlessly. He holds onto the boys statement stubbornly, as Felix and Jisung greet each other excitedly, hugging tightly and pouring out their 'I missed you!'s.

As Jisung moves back to his boyfriend, Minho takes up the boy's comment again, pouting childishly, "I do not _obsessively_ clean the apartment." Changbin and Felix move around the couple as if they're not there, the older taking their luggage out of the way and leaning it against the closest wall, "Minho, you _willingly_ vacuum."

Felix makes his way to his boyfriend giving him a chaste kiss to welcome him back home while the couple bickers, "Was the airport crowded?" Changbin follows the Australian back into the kitchen, "No, it was—" Changbin stops dead in his tracks, "are you cooking?"

The older quickly moves a stray textbook _away_ from the _burning_ stove and _boiling_ pot of water. Felix rolls his eyes, "Yes, I am _cooking_, is that an issue?"

Changbin looks scared, and rightfully so, "Well, uhm, I guess I'm just worried—" Felix suddenly throws the noodles into the pot of water haphazardly, making Changbin jump with genuine fear, "Babe, I thought we talked about just ordering in some food?"

The pout that forms on the Aussie's face makes Changbin immediately regret his words, "Binnie, I promised them a proper meal, I want to cook something nice for them."

The older melts at the boy's wholesome wishes, there was no possible way he could say no. He leans over to kiss his boyfriends temple, silently praying he won't burn anything, "Then I'll leave you to it."

Changbin hesitantly leaves the boy's side, as much as he hates to leave him alone with a pot of scalding water, his sense of self-preservation moves him out of the kitchen and back in front of the bickering couple.

"There is a simple standard of cleanliness, Jisung."

The short boy claps his hands on the couple's shoulders with exasperation, he was tired of this topic already and he had only just arrived, "Okay, enough of that," he moves them over to the couch sitting them on either side of him. If Felix would have noticed their pow-wow forming in the living room, they would look quite suspicious, however (thankfully) the young Australian was completely immersed in his cooking.

Changbin leaned in, his arms that wrapped around his friends shoulders drawing them in as well, it was clear they were being let in on a secret, "Okay," Changbin whispered, "Felix is in the kitchen _cooking_," neither of the men he sat with seemed concerned, but they had never experienced the extent of his boyfriend's awful cooking skills so full on as Changbin had, "and I just want to warn you, whatever is produced from this sudden burst of culinary inspiration, I expect that you pretend it is the most delicious dish you have ever eaten," he looks in between the two baseball players, "Got it?"

The look of concern on Jisung's face was matched by Minho, both unsure if Changbin's serious tone was supposed to be taken lightly or not.

"If it's inedible, I am granting you permission to hide it in your napkin and move it around your plate until it looks like you've eaten a sizable amount."

This did not relieve the worried countenance lying on Jisung's features, he was hungry.

Changbin sighs, nodding as he squeezed his friends shoulders in reassurance, "And I promise I will give you money to buy food on your way to the hotel."

Jisung smiles as his boyfriend, both deciding this was a great idea telepathically. Minho offers his hand in a handshake, "You've got yourself a deal, Mr. Seo."

—

There had been a few moments of silence in the car before Chan turned in his seat completely, looking at Woojin silently.

The airport's parking lot was dark, they were on the 5th floor, the only noise came from the busy sounds of Los Angeles in the distance.

"What are you doing?"

Chan smiled, he was caught, "I'm getting a good look at you."

The older laughed at his boyfriends antics, nodding to hide his faint blush, "Okay well you tell me when you're done."

The couple sat their for a few more moments, a comfortable silence coming over them as they examined each other. They didn't even try to hide their stupid smiles.

"You changed your hair."

Woojin's face morphs into surprise, he had forgotten Chan hadn't seen him since it was dyed black, "Ah, yeah," he pauses examining the younger's face to gauge his reaction, "do you like it?"

Chan smiled, it was a timid one. There was a weird vibe in the car, in the night.

"I love it."

Woojin's smile faltered, maybe he winced. It wasn't exactly convincing, or enthusiastic, "Are you sure?"

Chan seemed to recognize his hesitancy immediately, "Yes! Sorry, I really do like it, it suits you."

The car seemed suffocating, why?

What was different?

Woojin couldn't stand it.

"Is something wrong?"

Chan was silent.

The older began to get frustrated, "Seriously, what the hell is going on? As soon as you saw me in the airport you've been looking as if I killed your dog."

A frustrated sigh comes out of the Aussie's lips, "It's nothing, Wooj."

"That's such bullshit," the frustrated man says, his eyebrows draw together angrily, "When have we ever been like this? When have I ever been angry?"

"When have we spent enough time together to even know, Woojin?!"

The yell was crisp in the stale air, Chan didn't lose his temper like this.

Woojin is speechless.

Chan huffs frustratedly, attempting to stay calm, as he always does.

It stays silent.

"I can't _do _this anymore."

The older speaks in a calm tone, unbelieving, "What the hell are you talking about, Chan?"

He takes in a sharp breath, "I mean," his voice is shaky, "I can't live 11 hours away from the person I love anymore, Woojin, I _can’t do it_.”

Woojin doesn't speak, he doesn't know what to say.

Chan sniffles weakly, a tiny voice coming out, "When do long distance relationships work out anyway?"

Its silent again.

"Come live with me after you graduate," Woojin looks up from his hands, taking a serious look into his boyfriends eyes, "in Seoul."

Tears well up in the boy's eyes, he looks hurt by this, "So, what, you want me to just leave LA? Just give up on everything I've done here after I graduate college?"

Woojin knows this was a mistake.

"Do you know how hard I've worked to make myself someone in that company? I'm not just the stupid intern anymore, people know me, Woojin, you know that."

Chan scoffs, "Or maybe you don't, I don't know."

Woojin opens his mouth to say something, but Chan doesn't let him.

"Let's just go home, you're already here."

Woojin faintly hears the sarcastic laughter, and the Aussie speaking under his breath, _"home."_

—

"Remember I sucked your dick on that chair."

Jisung had just gotten out of the shower, to find a spaced out Minho looking at said chair longingly from his seat on the bed.

The younger took Minho by surprise, snapping his head to face the boy. He was wearing a big t-shirt and shorts, drying his hair idly with the hotel towel.

There was a hesitancy, and a lingering in Minho's look as he examined the freshly cleaned Jisung, "What the hell are you talking about now, Jisung-ah?"

Minho hates the look on Jisung's face, or maybe he loves it.

"You know what I'm talking about, Hyung." he says it with a devilish smile, Minho wouldn't expect any less.

"Well, not that _exact _chair."

Jisung is satisfied that he at least put the idea in the older's head, "Yeah, but you still remember all the things we did in that hotel room."

There's a silence as Minho thinks deeply, eyes taking his boyfriend carefully, "What are you trying to start?"

Jisung approaches the bed, standing in between Minho's legs, provoking him as he looks down at him.

"You know what I'm trying to start."

The younger pushes the man back down on the bed, coming up over him to straddle him.

Minho's demeanor changes, he was already fully convinced, but he loved when Jisung shamelessly seduced him.

Jisung almost pouts, his innocent act does nothing for him as he grinds down on his boyfriend, eliciting a low groan from the man, "This is our last opportunity for you to fuck me good before baseball season starts."

Minho's grip on the boy's thighs tighten, as if he's trying to restrain himself.

Lips are felt on the older's neck, soft teasing pecks. This close to Minho's ear Jisung can't hide his soft little gasps caused by the little stimulation he was causing, "Coach will _kill_ me if I limp around the field."

Jisung sits up straight, almost jumping a little bit causing Minho to moan lowly. The younger runs his hands up and down the front of his boyfriend's torso, pouting once again, "We'll be stuck with boring old blowjobs."

Minho chuckles lightly, taking the boy by the waist and flipping them over swiftly. He kisses the front of Jisung's neck, looking up at him teasingly, "I don't know," he leans down again to kiss the boy's collar bone softly, hands trailing up the front of the boy's shirt,"you can make a blowjob pretty entertaining if you ask me."

—

The lobby was beige, white, and so silent you could hear a pin drop.

It reminded Seungmin of the morning he dropped Hyunjin off. The only difference he found was the warmth spread though his chest at the thought of seeing his boyfriend again instead of the cold feeling of separation.

There were a few people sitting in the waiting room silently, but it was calm, as it should be.

Seungmin approached the reception desk with hesitation clear in his movements. The receptionist waited patiently as the boy made his way up with innate shyness, placing his hands softly on the desk, "Hi, my name is Kim Seungmin," he breaths in a fortifying breath, "I'm here to pick up Hwang Hyunjin."

She smiled sweetly, nodding politely, dialing a number on the desk phone calmly.

The sun shined through the big windows of the reception office, hitting Seungmin's eyes softly.

It was spring again.

It reminded him of the year before, making new friends, meeting the love of his life. The flowers on the trees outside fluttered in the wind, Seungmin couldn't help but feel a connection with them.

He felt free.

_Hyunjin _was free.

"He's on his way down, Sir."

Seungmin bowed politely, moving away from the desk, longingly looking at the doors, the doors he had watched him enter 90 days ago.

The boy laughed to himself, a sad one.

It seemed a lot longer than 90 days.

He could have sat down, but he couldn't bring himself to, only being able to stand and stare at the rehab door expectantly.

The buzz of the door opening was ugly in the quiet room, but it made Sengmin excited along with all the other people turning their heads, watching hopefully.

Seungmin watched the door creak open slowly.

It was nerve wracking.

The first thing he saw was fluffy black hair, bouncing on the top of a familiar head, a familiar face.

He wore an adorable beige sweater that swallowed him whole and a pair of gray sweatpants.

It made Seungmin almost want to cry, he looked, comfortable, he looked rested, he looked like he did when he woke up beside him.

Like the first sweet kiss of the morning, like a breath of fresh air.

Hyunjin bowed politely to the nurse who held the heavy door open for him, eyes raising slowly to meet the weary eyes of his boyfriend.

Seungmin felt like everything had slowed down for him, to let him look at his boyfriend as long as he wanted.

But, that's not what he wanted.

Actually, he wanted to be in his boyfriend's arms as soon as possible.

He loved the way Hyunjin's face lit up, his eyes scrunched up in happiness, how his arms opened up almost reactionary to the boy running towards him.

It was warm, the hug.

Seungmin jumped straight into the boys arms, wrapping his limbs around him tightly, Hyunjin held him without question.

Maybe he was a baby, but Seungmin couldn't help but cry, it had been _way_ too long since he had seen the man holding him.

Hyunjin kisses the side of his head in response, a big fat smile ironed on his face.

Reluctantly Seungmin slid out of his boyfriends grip to stand on his own feet again, however it was only because he wanted to see the boy's face.

The tears of joy were falling slowly and Hyunjin couldn't help himself when he wiped them sweetly.

Seungmin wanted to say something but all the emotions laying beneath his skin weighed on him, he couldn't say anything.

"Hi."

Hyunjin finds this funny, heart filling with warmth at the mere sight of his boyfriend. He pulls Seungmin into another hug, petting his hair as the boy sniffles happily in his shoulder.

"I missed you."

Seungmin's smile is bright, his grip tightens on his boyfriend's waist, "I missed you too."

Hyunjin finally pulls away, looking into the boys eyes seriously, "I promise to never do this to you again."

The tiny boy hits Hyunjin's shoulder playfully, "You better not, I will not hesitate to leave your sorry ass."

Laughter bubbles up between the two, Hyunjin picks up his duffle and slinging an arm around his boyfriend as they start to slowly make their way out of the clinic.

"You know," Seungmin looks up sweetly at the man, "we don't have to go tomorrow if you just want to stay home."

Hyunjin kisses his cheek for his consideration, speaking softly against the boy's temple, "The only thing that could make me almost as happy as I am right now, is seeing my friends."

The boy in his arms perks up, giving a chaste peck to him, he didn't care who saw.

—

"I swear the whole world could be in an emergency lock down and you would still be here practicing."

Jeongin isn't shy about glare he shoots at Kevin, "We're not in an emergency lock down but we are weeks away from *opening day."

*first game of the baseball season

The older walks over to the boy, giving him a warm back hug, "Give yourself a break for once."

The stubborn one turns around in his boyfriend's arms, a look of satisfaction settled on his face, "I _will_," Kevin's look of relief is turned sour at the boy's next words, "_after_ baseball season."

Kevin scowls at the trick despite playing with the little hairs on the back of the younger's neck, "Just promise me you won't over work yourself."

Jeongin rolls his eyes, leaning up for a sweet peck from the older, "I promise." He moves away as he packs his duffel full of baseball gear, talking over his shoulder, "In fact, we're going drinking tonight."

"We _are_?" Kevin couldn't hide the obvious surprise in his voice, Jeongin was not the type to suggest a night of drinking, "You know that _is _illegal here right?"

The younger turns around, hands on his hips, "Since when did you become a rule follower?"

Kevin only glared in response.

Jeongin walked up to his boyfriend, wrapping his arms around his waist as he looks up sweetly, "All my friends from Seoul are coming to visit and _you _are coming with me."

A suspicious look still was ironed on Kevin's face, causing the younger to roll his eyes once again, "Chan is buying the booze and we're enjoying it in the privacy of his apartment, is that more legal for you goody two shoes?"

Kevin sticks out his tongue childishly, "Yes, thank you _so __much_, I feel _so _much better."

Jeongin wraps his arms around the older's neck, kissing him teasing, "You're _very _welcome."

—

The first thing Jisung noticed when Woojin opened the door was his fake smile and the lack of a Chan in the room.

Jisung knew Woojin, and this was not him.

Changbin was the first person to speak up, arm slung around Felix holding his prized wine bottle, "I come bearing gifts!"

A more genuine smile spreads on the man's face, maybe of relief. He hugs him gratefully, pulling away to look at him sarcastically, maybe he rolls his eyes, _"Thank you,_ Changbin."

Woojin looks to his side to see a shy aussie, the oldest opens up his arms with a welcoming air, hugging him politely, "Hey, Felix, nice to see you."

The squirrel like boy excited jumps in place, opening his arms excitedly for his manager, "Hi, Hyung!"

Another eye roll is produced from the older but he excepts the hug, "I'm around you too much, you miss me after only a couple days."

The group laughs a the man's sarcastic comment, Woojin greeting Minho with a side hug warmly.

"Okay! Enough greetings, everyone inside before Chan's neighbors complain."

Felix laughs as his boyfriend clings to his ex-manager, the muscular boy letting the older drag him into the apartment via his back hug. He wouldn't say it, but he _had_ missed him.

The manager takes this opportunity to take the man by the ear, Changbin immediately curling up in pain as Felix carefully takes the wine bottle from his hands and into the kitchen, "I have a bone to pick with you," the younger whines at the pain coming from his ear until Woojin finally releases his grip, "Why didn't you think to tell me Jeongin was nominated for Rookie of the Year?"

An incredulous look forms on Changbin's face, "Was I _wrong _to assume you already knew?"

"You should have told me as soon as you found out!" The older says, going to reach for the boy's ear again.

"Ah! Ah!" Changbin flinches away, holding his hands up in innocence, "You're right! You're right! I'm sorry!"

Woojin smiles at his friend bemusedly, pinching his cheek teasingly, "Have you been treating your new manager well?"

Changbin waves away the older's hand, Felix coming back from the kitchen to wrap an arm around his boyfriend's waist, joining the conversation, "Can't understand what he's saying anyway!"

The Aussie rolls his eyes at the boy's comment, hitting his shoulder playfully, "He's underselling himself, the amount of English he's learned in a year amazes me sometimes."

The dark boy can't help but fake his modesty, smiling teasingly, _"Noo,_ but please go on."

Felix pokes the boy's side in reaction to his ego, "No, it will only go to your big fat head."

Changbin pouts as Felix directs his attention back to the oldest in front of them, "By the way, where's Chan?"

Jisung who had been looking around Chan's apartment idly perks up at this question, he was wondering the same thing.

Both Felix and Jisung notice how Woojin's smile fades immediately, he seems taken by surprise, like he wasn't expecting his name to be mentioned in his apartment, "Oh, uh, he's out buying the food for tonight."

Felix nods hesitantly, trying to lighten the sudden dampened mood, "Ah, _of course _he didn't buy it in advance." the Aussie says, shaking his head disapprovingly.

"Yeah," Woojin's fake smile wasn't helping his unconvincing tone, "he just needed some air."

The room was only silent for a few beats, but the words hung the air with gravity, with meaning.

The door bell rang crisp in the silent air, Woojin suddenly moved, like he was dying to move away from the air in the living room.

Jisung silently watched Woojin open the door, Seungmin and Hyunjin yelling something about how they coincidentally met up with Chan in the parking lot, the oldest's fake laughter carrying through the room. Minho leans over Jisung's shoulder as they watch the scene unfold, Chan and Woojin avoiding each other carefully, "I don't know him as well as you do but," he pauses as Chan yells something to roll about bringing the booze, "Is something wrong with Woojin?"

The younger nods slowly, "Yeah, somethings up." he turns around to look his boyfriend in the eye, "I'll figure it out though don't worry." he ends with a sad smile and a sweet peck from Minho.

Seungmin wasted no time making his way into the living room, making Jisung jump up and hug his friend happily, "Oh, god, suffocation."

From the door way, Woojin laughed genuinely, closing the door after everyone, "He's surprisingly clingy for someone who you see almost everyday isn't he?"

The boy in Jisung's arms nodded exasperatedly after he finally let go, Hyunjin coming up behind him. Jisung smiled at the sight of his long lost enemy, "_Hello_ Hyunjin."

"_Hello_ Jisung, nice to see you again." It was a long running joke that they still hated each other but through the countless times they were forced to hang out due to being best friends with each other's boyfriends, they had actually become quite close.

Minho clapped Hyunjin on the back in one of their "bro" hugs while Chan yelled trying to gather everyone near the table he was placing his grocery bags on.

Woojin approached the table everyone else talked loudly instead of listening, a shy smile on his face, a look of reconciliation, "It's like herding cats, isn't it?"

Chan's smile faded at the sight of the man, he laughs politely, like he thinks he has to. Maybe it was a scoff, like he was amazed he had the balls to come talk to him.

Either way, he didn't respond.

—

The night was cold, but Chan liked it, the apartment was too hot inside.

Everyone else was grilling meat, drinking, laughing, but Chan didn't feel like it, his thoughts were battling too intensely to focus on his friends.

The sound of the balcony door opening caused Chan to snap his head to find a hesitant Felix closing the door silently, "Hey, Lix."

It was nice to speak English again, all the Korean he had been speaking today was getting jumbled up in his head.

Felix joined his friend on the balcony railing, leaning on his arms as he looked at the older expectantly, "What's wrong, Chan?"

The pale man hated how the tears pricked his eyes at the words, so much was wrong.

He rubs his eyes, trying to hide his glassy eyes, "I don't know what to do."

His shaky voice gives him away causing Felix to rub his back comfortingly, it caught the eyes of Changbin from inside, he had been watching through the window, he wanted Chan to be okay too. The peeping boy looked over to Woojin to his left, his eyes were glued to the window out to the balcony, sitting unstably as if wanted to run outside and take his boyfriend in his arms.

Felix spoke in a whisper though he didn't have to, he felt like if he spoke too loudly Chan would break, "You can talk to me, Hyung."

Chan nods, sniffling as he tries to compose himself, "I told Woojin I couldn't do long distance anymore."

The younger couldn't help the disappointment that seeps through his voice, "_Oh_."

"Yeah, _I know_." he can't help but laugh at himself, "I keep going back and forth between whether or not I was in the wrong," he pauses as he thinks back on the moment in the car, "we were both angry."

Felix tries to digest the words, "_So_, what did he say?"

Chan seems angry at himself, "He told me to come live with him in Seoul."

"Then what's the problem?"

The older shakes his head, like he was angry, "I can't leave everything I have here, Felix."

It was quiet for a few moments, Felix carefully choosing his words.

"Why not?"

It was an obvious question, it made sense, but for some reason he couldn't answer.

Felix stroked the man's back, sighing deeply before speaking up again.

"What you really need to be asking yourself right now is: what's more important? This supposed job or Woojin?"

Chan furrows his brow, "Well when you put it that way it sounds like there's an obvious choice but—“

"But what, Chan?" the younger sounded frustrated as well, "Do you love him?"

At first it seems like he might hesitate, but for the first time glassy eyes meet his friend's, "Fuck, _yes,_ with my whole heart."

Felix smiles patting his back lightly, "Then that's my answer to you."

Jisung looked up from his plate, watching the longing Woojin watching the window so sadly. The baseball player couldn't watch his manager sit like that anymore, he reaches a hand over on his shoulder, shaking it slightly. Woojin's surprised eyes searched the boy who had caught his attention, checking to see if he was okay only to see a comforting smile sat on his face.

"Go talk to him, Hyung."

Woojin shook as if he didn't expect anyone to notice, however he stood up immediately, speed walking straight out the door, almost running into Felix on his way out.

He leaves the door open, he wanted everyone to hear, "Chan," he takes a fortifying breath, "I love you, _Jesus _I love you so much, I don't know what else to say except," he walks forward to take the man's hands in his, "please don't give up on me, I know this shit is so hard, but _please _just don't give up on me. I can't live without you."

Said boy moves toward him, the words had him choked up. He placed his hands on the boy's cheeks lovingly, "I could never give up on you, Woojin."

Woojin immediately lets out a breath of relief, "Thank god," he nods hopefully, "Okay, we can work on this, I could visit more often, _hell_ _I_ could move—"

Chan cuts him off, shaking his head at the rambling man in front of him, "I want to move to Seoul."

The man is speechless, he opens and re-opens his mouth several times, searching the Aussie's eyes for regret, "A—are you sure?"

"Yes, fuck, _yes_," he laughed through his teary eyes, "I was just being stubborn before, please let me come live with you, please grow old with me."

Woojin answers with a passionate kiss, cheers coming from the gays watching intently from inside, drunken yells and clapping cheerfully making the couple on the balcony smile into the kiss.

Jisung stands up quickly dragging the boys inside, handing them both a shot of soju. The whole room bulged with joy and laughter, kisses and hugs shared everywhere.

The door opened revealing a smiling Jeongin, having heard the yelling from down the hall, "I'm here now so the party may begin!"

Everyone laughed and yelled at the entrance, 'your late's attacking him as soon as he opened the door.

A _very_ drunk Jisung stands up, Minho cautiously holding his leg on the floor beside him however a big dopey smile was on display as he looked up at his boyfriend lovingly, "It's the Rookie of the Year!"

Red blush decorates Jeongin's cheeks as a proud Kevin comes behind to twirl him.

Jisung claps and soon it spreads through the room, however Minho has to sit him down when he starts to yell.

The youngest bounds around the room giving a bone crushing hug to Jisung, "I missed you!"

The friends break into a fake cry until Jeongin spots the rest of his friends, finally crashing next to Hyunjin, giving him a big hug as the man pours him a drink.

Jeongin goes to pour his friend a shot but Hyunjin stops him graciously, "Oh nah, I'm not drinking, you go ahead."

The boy smiles knowingly, glad to see the cleaned up Hyunjin sat beside him, he wraps an arm around the man's shoulders and squeezes tightly.

Kevin sits down beside his lover shyly, he couldn't help but feel out of place.

Jeongin of course notices this, yelling to everyone at the busy table, "This is my boyfriend Kevin, everyone say hi!"

Felix leans over the table with a bottle of soju as everyone greets him happily, Changbin hold his waist so he doesn't face plant in someone's plate, "We always take in the gays, welcome to the family."

Kevin laughs, graciously taking the drink while Jeongin kisses his cheek sweetly.

It doesn't take long for Jisung to start up again, yelling that he was making a toast.

When it was quiet and the only sound left was the sizzling of the barbecue he spoke.

"I would like to make a toast," he pauses for dramatic effect, "for baseball." Groans are heard throughout the room but Jisung insists, "No—wait guys just listen, not only for giving me a job, but for showing me who I am, and for introducing me to all you lovely people. This time a year ago I met some of my closest friends," he pauses as he looks at everyone at the table, "and I don't know what I would do without you guys, I truly do not. I would like to thank Jeongin and Seungmin for forcing me to play with Hyunjin, my mortal enemy, and therefore meet my future boyfriend because lord knows I wouldn't have had the balls the approach him otherwise, shout out to ya'll," Minho laughs kissing the side of this boyfriends head at his antics, "I'm so glad we're all together again, it makes my heart so happy."

"So, uh, for all of that," he wouldn't admit it but he didn't really remember what he said, "cheers!"

They clinked their glasses merrily, despite Jisung's peculiar speech.

Minho was completely infatuated with Jisung, but he would have to tell him that later. He also knew at some point he would have to cut Jisung off, but for now, a little more alcohol couldn't kill him.

—

If Lee Minho was forced to explain how he felt, he wouldn't know where to start.

He felt buzzed.

His cheeks were rosy and they hurt from all the smiling he did tonight. If not for the sleeping boy on his shoulder maybe he would have been unstable, but he felt as if having Jisung curled up on him sobered him, made him smile all over again.

He felt nostalgic.

There was soft music playing through the uber yet it felt like they were in the back of Chan's van again, like they had just finished playing the hardest game of their lives. It was dark, it was late, but the city lights lit up the sleepy boy's features every once in a while, he loved how the city always glowed.

He felt sad.

It would probably be a long time until he saw everyone again, his friends.

He felt relieved.

Minho knew he would see them again someday.

He felt invigorated.

This night reminded him why he was alive, why he ever went on. Why he loved Han Jisung, though he was reminded often. The thought of Jisung's happy face made his heart beat faster.

Most of all however, he felt grateful.

To whatever god granted him the life he lives, the friends he has, the boyfriend he loves, he was eternally grateful.

Minho raised a hand to move a piece of hair off the sleeping's boy's forehead. He smiled at his peaceful face, it was the most relaxed he had seen him all night, week maybe. He leaned down to press a gentle kiss to the boy's forehead. The shadows passed by through the windows, Minho watched the boy sleep for a while.

He whispered quietly, stroking his boyfriend's cheek.

"Thank you, Han Jisung, _thank you_."

_"for everything."_

—

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it’s over ! it’s so sad that i have to say goodbye but i’m happy with how it turned out.
> 
> thank you to everyone who stuck with me and has been patient with me.
> 
> i truly hope you enjoyed it.
> 
> if you did, please look out for any of my fics in the future.
> 
> love you guys :)


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